Is love a feeling or a choice?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • A choice, at least in my case.

    Nobody is owed love; I choose to love you depending on what you can do for me.

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    • Show All
    • Again, never said it was unconditional... Feelings change. I guess I was thinking that you were saying what they could offer as far as actions they do for you or providing material things. Of course when you move someone out comes with other feelings, but I don't think of those things as something they are doing for me. I think of those things as something just naturally occurs when you love someone. Those things weren't conscious thoughts, but yes they are there and part of mutual love. I guess I just see it a bit different, but I get what you are saying now.

    • Sorry for typos. *When you love someone it comes with other feelings*

Most Helpful Girl

  • Deep down it is a choice we make in our subconscious mind and only then it transforms to the feeling. I believe that we love with brain not with heart. We can fall in and out of love anytime. It is not emotion which makes us blind. It is our mind which decides to love or not to love somebody.

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What Guys Said 11

  • Agree w/ one of the anons. Love is a feeling but with choices involved. You can choose to ignore your feelings towards someone, choose to be with them, choose to dump them... There are lots of things you can choose! However, when you're with the person you find attractive you may feel happiness, comfort, and the "fuzzy" feelings inside. All of this is usually involved. People think of love in different ways.

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  • It's both. The feeling part is probably the easiest to understand. But it's what motivates us to choose to do things that are themselves acts of love.

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  • Love is an action and connection, not an emotion. The feeling you feel from it is euphoria and bliss. When people get this mixed up, it can develop unhealthy relationships. Just because I have the feelings that feel identical, from the feelings of love, doesn't mean it love. It's all in your actions and connection you have for that person.. Things done out of love are actions of unconditional care.

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  • I say feeling. I can't force myself to love someone. I can choose to care about them but love is just something that has to happen on it's own naturally. At least in my opinion.

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  • Both. In my opinion

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  • Love is COMPLETELY emotion, and isn't a conscious choice.

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  • totally a feeling

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  • It's a feeling lol if it was a choice I would never allow myself to be so opened

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  • Feels like a choice mostly.

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  • Feeling. A. damn tough one too

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  • feelings for guys and calculation for girls.

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What Girls Said 8

  • It's a feeling. Damn, I wish it was a choice.

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  • A feeling for sure. However, you can choose to do what's best for you or not.

    For instance, you can love someone who isn't good for you, but you can love yourself enough to separate yourself from them. You can love them, but you can do that from afar.

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  • it's... neurochemistry.

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  • It's a feeling :)

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  • hard to explain considering feelings cannot be controlled nor can falling for someone

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  • It's a feeling, but it's your choice whether to come close to a person or not, otherwise you won't be able to feel love for another person.

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  • It's a choice

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  • Wow great question - that is really deep!

    Ideally, I think it is both a feeling and a choice. Feeling should come first since you have no control over how you feel while a choice is something you consciously make.

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