Guys, Forced to go to a gay club. I was then called a "homophobe" for leaving early?

So a bunch of my partner's friends are gay. She asked if I would go with her to this club out of town. I told her that it wouldn't really be my scene but after badgering me for 2 hours and throughout dinner, I said I would.

We got there at 11:30pm. It wasn't busy at the time, so I thought it might actually be an alright night. By 1:30 am it was full.

I got extremely uncomfortable because a bunch of men were flirting with me... so I told them I was straight and not interested. One of them said "So why are you here then?" and I said "it's none of your concern".

At one point I lost it, so I sent a text to my partner and let her know I was leaving. Apparently her (gay) friends all think I'm a homophobe now...

My partner isn't mad at me, thankfully. She told me it wasn't the best night ever.

So was it homophobic that I left early?


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What Girls Said 1

  • You are. Just a little though. The new place and environment just made you a litter more uncomfortable.

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    • So uncomfortable = homophobic?

      If I was uncomfortable around a heterosexual couple kissing I would be "heterophobic"?

      Strong logic.

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    • I told them I was straight and not interested. What's wrong with that?

      Should I have said "I'm gay, come home with me" instead?

    • That wasn't wrong. It's the second part of the conversation. When someone asks you what are you doing here, it's usually polite to say, just hanging out with a friend, instead of 'none of your concern'. You were uncomfortable and you couldn't stand the environment anymore so you bailed. You didn't even tell your partner or her gay friends in person that you're leaving. You just sent a text. These things do point towards you being homophobic. It may or may not be true.

What Guys Said 2

  • No, why would it be. You didn't want to be hit on by a bunch of guys. So if thats homophobic, any gay person who is uncomfortable being constantly hit on by some one of the opposite gender would be heterophobic. Call them out on it. Just because their gay doesn't mean they have the right to do what they please and be as ignorant and prejudice as they please (they are judging you because your straight after all).

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  • Did you assault or belittled anyone for their sexual preference? If not you're no homophobe

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