What do you guys think of this short poem?

I know it is awful but I'm just starting to write poetry and need some help.
Advice and thoughts on it needed please!

the world

has parted

the skies and seas,

the started and uncharted,

the fantasies and realities,

leaving us caught in between.

forcing us to decide

to be the tide

or in the tide

in both where we can be tied

cast aside

multiplied.

but why

must we choose

when we might lose.

but why

must we choose

when we might be bruised.

but why

must we choose

when we might be accused.

but why.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • i like this. very simple but powerful. i like how u slowed ur reader down by separating the words on different lines. not bad at all =]

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What Girls Said 2

  • It's really nice! :) keep making poetry and in no time you'll get a lot better!!

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  • Poetry is the engineering of emotions. What I just read was very deep & intrinsic.

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