Who can tell the best jokes?

Feeling pretty down lately (weight, looks, money, school etc) and need a pick me up. who here can tell the best Jokes and write them out!


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Most Helpful Guy

  • -Wanna hear a modern joke? Feminism.

    -Why do the Parisians plant trees along their streets?
    -So that the Germans can march in a shade.

    -What's the difference between a dead ganster and a dead dog on the road?
    -The dog will have break tracks behind it.

    -What do the console peasants think of 60FPS gaming?
    -Nothing, they don't experience it.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • When life gives you lemons, throw it back in its face and tell it to give you something useful.

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What Guys Said 15

  • What's the difference between a Harley Davidson motorcycle and a vacuum cleaner?

    With a vacuum cleaner, the dirt bag is on the inside!

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  • Being vegetarian is a huge missed steak

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  • What's the difference between Snowden and Clinton exposing classified information?

    Snowden is wanted for treason, Clinton is wanted for president.

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  • There was a young man from Kent.
    Who's cock was exceedingly bent.
    To save himself trouble,
    He put in double
    And instead of Cumming
    He went.

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  • We ride together we bake pies together

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  • I love science jokes, I've always got my ion them.

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  • If your dog is barking at the back door and your girlfriend is yelling at the front door "who do you let in first"? The dog of course, it will shut up when you let it in.

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  • This is slightly racist so if anyone is offended, I apologize in advance,

    OK, there's 2 Indian guys trying to rob a bank. One is the gunman, and one is the getaway driver. The gunman leaves the car and runs inside. When he gets back to the car, instead of holding a bag of money, he's brought smartphones, tablets, and a whole desktop computer.
    "Why'd they give you all this tech? Selling it takes longer than just grabbing the money" says the driver.
    The gunman responds "They thought I was tech support". :)

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  • I'm 😉

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  • What's the worst part about being a Bernie supporter? Having to drive your girlfriend's son to school everyday.

    #FuckLeftism

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  • i'll eat you out ;)

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  • a girl was sucking her boyfriend's cock then he told her i'm gay.. she told him i'm shemale and fucked his ass then he got pregnant from anal sex and eventually but last but not least the kid game with vagina and cock.

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  • Wife: "I look fat. Can you give me a compliment?"
    Husband: "You have perfect eyesight."

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What Girls Said 3

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