Why, traditionally, men are supposed to ask a woman out, ask her to marry, pay for the first date, etc?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Because prior to the last couple centuries women had virtually no power. They were quite literally treated as property. Men courted women they liked in order to gain favor to be able to marry them from their fathers'. The father could ultimately marry off their daughter to the highest bidder but I'm sure some liked to take their daughter's preference into consideration.

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    • True, but for over 200 years + we have moved on, but asking to marry or asking out has remained the same, why?

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    • @mistixs lol fathers are not paying men to marry anymore. so they are not.

    • @dudeman
      bride price is just one tradition. Dowries are the reverse. Bride gifts have also existed side by side, and a ring is a type if bride gift if a somewhat potlatche one.

What Girls Said 9

  • Traditionally, it was because women weren't in control of any money and were seen as possessions - therefore men had to ask her - or, more appropriately, her family - to marry them because the woman wasn't allowed to make her own legal decisions like that. Same goes for paying for the first date, women didn't have money so they couldn't pay. It's a tradition that seems to have stuck around, though there's no real reason why it should.

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  • if other animals whined and cried the way human BOYS do about having to make the approach they'd go extinct. it's natural for men to do the pursuing. to try to make themselves seem as appealing as possible to get the woman/women. weak mwn stay single and keep their weak genes from being passed on. basic survival of the fittest. grow a pair of balls or get over it and enjoy your solitude. or work on making yourself more physically desirable and maybe you'll be lucky enough to have a more powerful/stronger woman than you to make the approach.

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  • Because it's "Manly" for a guy to "take charge" I don't fucking know but I don't buy into it either. I wasn't going to wait around for the odd chance that the guy I liked might subliminally get the message that I liked him and ask me out. No one is a mind reader so I just told him what I wanted and asked him out, now it's almost been two years we've been together. I say if you want someone or something go out and get it I don't care what's between your legs!

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  • Because traditions are extremely hard to break? How many women still wear white dresses during marriage? A lot. How many are virgins when they marry? I'm willing to bet not as many that wear white dresses.
    How many guys still ask women out? A lot. How many have to? None.

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  • Because traditionally Wemon weren't considered people. You didn't ask the girl anything you asked her father. So Wemon are still crawling out of their submissive roles.
    We have moved forward a bit from asking fathers to asking the girl but there is still a bit to go. This is not just on the girls side either I have asked questions to men on gag that if their girl asked them to marry them (given that they wanted to marry) would they say yes. A good majority either said no or that they would dislike it because it would hurt their pride.(or around those lines)

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  • Paying for dates where I'm from is just called being a gentlemen. Anyone can do the asking out but why would a man want a woman to propose?

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  • Women were indentured servants meant to look pretty and grow sons

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  • Because traditionally they're viewed as more dominant/confident, be the breadwinner etc... But it's changing a lot now these days but that's my guess.

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  • Because they're men

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What Guys Said 6

  • it comes from chivalry.

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  • We're the predators they're the prey

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  • That's how we've evolved as primates. You see it in chimps and whatnot as well. Females need resources to carry offspring, males offer resources in exchange for sexual access.

    Not that I agree with the practice of that tradition now - and this is where the chimp analogy comes in - I think of it like getting mad and attacking someone for stealing your banana; it's uncivilized.

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  • Because women used to be super passive and didn't have jobs

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  • Because women are lazy.

    Because in the past women didn't have money.

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  • I dont do this, if women want a piece of me then they gotta do it themselves. I am really awesome too so women that choose to wait for me to ask them out are missing out on a lot. I am fully capable of asking them out, I just choose not to because why should I? They can do it themselves too, and since I am so great they are the ones that should be doing the asking.

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    • They probably do and then you ignore them. Quit being so conceited

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    • Nooo. It was to Anon

    • I bet you don't get too many women do you? It can go both ways a woman doesn't have to pursue you just like you don't have to after a woman. It's you that missing out if you choose to just sit there and let the woman do all the work. It takes two

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