Are there other reasons we should forgive and not hold grudges besides religion and god?

Usually I'm not into holding grudges unless the person really hurt me badly and play with my emotions or seriously deceive me.

However, whenever I hear about forgiving and not holding grudges it mostly likely involves religious connotations and how the lord forgives.

What if someone was an agnostic or atheist like me, then what would be the reason for forgiving? For me, I think that at some point you don't want to keep living with such anger inside you and you just want to let it out by not thinking negative about that wrongdoer anymore.

Updates:
For instance, I have a long-term online rival (years to be exact) and someone else mention that it's not nice to hold grudges and once again put religion into the conversation. That obviously didn't convince me at all.

0|0
3|5

Most Helpful Guy

  • Like you said, forgiving someone is a way of psychologically cleansing yourself (the ancient Greeks would call this catharsis). Though it might have some religious connotations, it's not actually something any religion has invented or has a monopole on. Forgiveness is an inherently human action and it has likely developed as a means to strengthen social bonds and society as a whole. That is why it is practiced everywhere around the world, regardless of ethnicity, culture and language. The people who wrote the new testament simply understood the importance of forgiveness and thus included it in their texts and in the legend of Jesus Christ. In other words: the bible merely tries to morally enforce an action that has already long before the bible was written. It is one of those rather few passages where the bible shows itself as a good-natured, positive and ethically good text.

    1|0
    0|0

Most Helpful Girl

  • I am agnostic myself and I work to forgive because the people that hurt me do not deserve to have any space in my heart reserved for them. My heart is for those I love and cherish. That space in your heart needs to be filled with love and empathy not hatred, poison, anger, and resentment. You are exactly right. Those people aren't worth the time of day let alone the kindness in your spirit. Don't let your hatred for them grow into a festering cancer because all you're doing is letting them continue to hurt you by hurting yourself. They aren't worth that and you deserve better than that.

    1|0
    0|0

What Guys Said 4

  • It's simply unhealthy for an individual to hold a grudge or not to forgive. it wears on you physically and mentally. It takes away from your positive energy as a person. It's as if you drink a glass of poison and hope that your rival dies from it. The only person that all that negativity affects is you and the people that's around you. I've learned to let It Go it's not worth it. I want to be happy and positive as a human being

    1|0
    0|0
  • I am atheist and I forgive and forget because there is no point being mad at someone unless they did something really heinous like rape or murder. If was something relatively harmless, it is more burdensome to care.

    1|0
    0|0
  • It makes you bitter and angry. why would you want to feel like that when forgiving can ease those emotions
    If you liked that person before or were ftiends with them then forgiving and sorting stuff out repairs the relationship
    If a long term grudge, then it just gets petty after a while, almost immature to still be annoyed about something from ages ago

    0|0
    0|0
    • One time I did liked that person (long, long ago) but very awful and false things were said about me... then I found out that person never liked me so that yeah that can hurt.

    • hmm yeah i can get why you wouldn't like that person... but just try to let it fade to a kind of indifferent neutral. there's nothing wrong with disliking someone in general, but try not to hold grudges over specific things. if you think her doing that one thing makes her a bit of a dick in general, fair enough, but just forget about her then (or him)

    • true... thanks, that rival is a guy that's like about 20 years older than me

  • Because life is too short to feel hate and prolonged negative feelings. It makes you unhappy, and life is too short to feel that way very often. However, it depends on how bad whatever he/she did to you was. Like cheating on you, that's awful, not gonna forgive that person. But if that person means something to you, then you should forgive them to let yourself be happy.

    0|0
    0|0
    • Yeah, if someone cheats on me they would be out of my life that very next day. I'm not the ''woman takes back cheating bf/husband'' type.

      You're right life is short. I'm going to eventually forgive my online rival one day.

What Girls Said 2

  • For your own mental health

    1|0
    0|0
  • I believe in God and religion but when I'm angry and decided to forgive people, I don't think just about The God, I think about myself and them too. My experiences were, when I forgave them, what I felt was very relax and free. It was like I said to myself, 'Hey Tia, you don't have any problem left. Everything is okay.' And so I believe that forgive people may make me happy, beside the religion side.

    0|0
    0|0
Loading...