Does anyone else not want kids?

Like I don't want kids ever. Like no. Never. If you ask why just look at all those people who have to take care of their family before themselves. No thanks!


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Most Helpful Guy

  • You're 20. No offense but I thought I'd never want to have sex when I was 8. Only 6 years later and I could hardly think about anything else. Sooner or later you'll feel your biological urges. I'm not saying you must have kids but ruling out something with 100% certainty is silly when you're only 20 years old. I'm 8 years older than you, getting close to my 30s and I can tell you one thing: you'll change a lot during the next 10 years. You probably don't believe me. That's fine. I also didn't believe my dad when he said "one day you'll want to kiss a girl". I thought he was talking bullshit. But my life experience has taught me that nothing should ever be completely ruled out. Even James Bond once said "Never say never" :-).

    Besides, taking care of someone else and feeling like they're more important than you can be a very valuable experience. It's humbling. I don't think learning to be humble is a bad thing. And just because you have children doesn't mean you'll never have time for yourself. If you find a good boyfriend/husband who is willing to share the work with you, it won't be all that bad. My parents also went traveling together when I was a little kid or my dad would stay home when my mom was working late or going to the movies or dinners with her friends.

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    • No way! I'll be damn!

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    • you that I love you very, very much and that I WANT to always stay together with you and that I'll PROBABLY want to get married with you but I can't promise you that we'll always be together until the end of our lives because it's something I simply don't know. I'd have to lie and I don't want to lie."
      I know some women find this attitude unromantic and I first thought so too but then I realized how right my girlfriend was. There are no certainties in life and thinking that there are is silly.

    • It would definitely make sense in other cases since some of them wouldn't be a major change. But having kids has got absolutely no benifits. Why would I ever make a decision that's only gonna ruin my life and make it miserable?

Most Helpful Girl

  • I know for a fact that I want a child in my life. But I often think about how selfish the act of having kids is. It is after all just the biological urge to propagate the species. All the good feelings that come with it, is just nature's way of ensuring we have an incentive to breed. It's natural selection at work. Nothing more.

    On the other hand, the more humans we bring onto this planet, the more we are destroying it. Of the thousands of babies born every second, how many actually contribute significantly to human kind? Most of human kind (me included) are more like just leaches on earth. With every minute of our existence we pollute and ruin earth for the other species that call it home... We have way more humans than is sustainable, yet we keep producing more and more...

    Meanwhile there are millions of kids out there that don't have parents or anyone to take care of them... why don't more people that want kids just adopt one of them?

    So what I am saying is, while I want kids, I recognise it to be a selfish desire, and would rather adopt children to fulfil my wish...

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What Guys Said 36

  • (Raises hands)

    I don't want the possibility of dealing with a depressed and unhappy kid that will always fight with me and probably end up doing something that may get themselves hurt or killed and then I would be the one to suffer for it afterwards.

    Besides with the way the current state of the world is, I think I'm better off completely passing on it. I honestly don't think the conditions will eventually improve and things are going to get worse eventually and by bringing someone into this world I believe I would only be setting them up for more suffering, pain and ultimately death. Which is something no one in their right mind would ever desire, want, demand and ask for.

    No kid of mine ever asked and requested me to bring them here in the first place therefore I feel it's the only control I really still have, I choose not to bring them here to save them all of the troubles and miseries they'd have to face once they are brought into existence here.

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    • perfect!

    • @apple24

      I'm glad we think similar then.

      If anybody ever come around to fuck with you and give you a hard time about not conforming to the societal "norms" of having children, just let me know.

      I think the more we "childfree by choice people" stand together then the less discrimination we will face and eventually it will have little or no real impact or effect.

      Fuck what they all think or feel.

      They can't control us and expect us all to follow the majority and jump on the bandwagon to become parents just because they are parents or had become parents. Though no offense to any parents out there as long as they don't expect or demand that the rest of us that are different than they are, to follow them and conform to their way.

    • Yeah I feel the same way!

  • Hi, I notice more people don't want kids. Deciding of whether to have kids will always be your decision and if that is what makes you happy, then that's alright. :)

    For me tho, even from a young age i always dreamed of having kids. Having my daughter has come with many life changing experiences and it is certainly tough, no doubt about that. But it was an experience that i wanted so i worked hard to create an environment so that i could support having kids.

    Honestly tho, as a dad, i really enjoy putting my family first ahead of my career sometimes... why? hard to describe, but i feel deep within my heart a sense of genuine happiness and peace. Strange as i was always taught to put myself ahead of others in my career and in life so as to not get "left behind", but it was the very opposite that eventually made me happy, to help and care for others. Anyway enough of me babbling on, haha :)

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  • I never wanted any but had an "accident" If I could do it over I still wouldn't have kids. My son and I have no relationship of any kind. The reason I didn't want kids is simple, I'm too selfish but I'm ok with that

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  • I used to want kids but not anymore. I can't be a good father. I just can't. Best for me to just not have them. Should be an easier and cheaper life too.

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    • If I may ask, why you feel like you can't be a good father?

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    • All the reasons you just listed doesn't make you a bad parent. Everyone goes through those doubts. With a partner that you love, you share those doubts, troubles and try to be the best parents you can be. Bc trust me, no parent is perfect :)

      Best wishes

    • @sovetskii13

      Glad you had your reality check before making any irrational decision or just giving in to the whole biological chemical process in our bodies and brains called "hormones", it's all a lie I tell ya. Physical attraction, sexual lust. They don't last forever. Looks eventually fade anyway. But if you do end up marrying someone, make sure you marry someone that is absolutely certain they do not want kids or at least open enough to follow through with it. If you want to be absolutely safe and certain, get a vasectomy or something.

  • Just be careful and it won't happen to you. But do keep in mind that I know oh so many women my age who said "Never!" when they were your age, and they are all either (1) raising now teenage kids or (2) regretting never doing it.

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    • never do what? lol Having kids? No thanks. I don't think so.

    • Hey, that's OK. It isn't for everyone. But I do know oh so many women who said "Never!" at 20, but some of them were aching to get pregnant by 30, and others were getting upset and crying that they no longer could at 40.

      I'm not saying that you will be one of them, but it does happen.

    • Hopefully my heart stay bitter and nothing can come by the way me and something I didn't need!

  • I do want kids of my own. Three would be perfect.

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  • Our ex daughter in law didn't want kids either... until she turned 35.

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  • You'll probably get more likely to think otherwise as you grow older, but that's just my opinion/guess.
    I've personally wanted one my whole life!

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  • That's OK. Plus you have 20 years to change your mind. Once you have one, you can't return it to where it came from...

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  • I'm 38 and I don't have any. I would be happy without them. I don't reallly want to have a rebellious teenager when I'm over 50

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    • hahah! That would be funny! lol

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    • @melmel1 I think about 38

    • @zagor Dang. Well I am happy for them :))

  • I'd very much like to have kids someday.

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  • see, when i have the money i am getting tons of cosmetic surgery like getting an eye colour change, teeth whitened etc but i know even after doing all that i'll go from being a 5/10 to a 7/10 at best, so its not worth putting in that dna in a kid and making his/ her life miserable

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  • Right now I don't, but, I go through phases of wanting one

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  • I don't. Life is already hard enough and dangerous enough, why would I bring another human into it.

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  • Just get a couple apple seeds boyo

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  • i dont planning on having kids any time soon unless its with my gay lover enrico and they have to be asain for some clichie reason :)

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  • Yep me

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  • I do!! 🙋🏾

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  • I don't want kids I would rather be a rich bachelor with a bunch of women then get married and settle down

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  • I don't

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  • Who you talking to lmao

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  • Not now, but I can't speak for my future self - I could change my mind.

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  • I'm open of having kids someday

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  • I want to be a Dad, but without a spouse it won't be happening.

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  • I didn't until I did

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  • Can't say I blame you.

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  • no i want kids.

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  • i want kids who grow up to be pop stars a good investment. ahha

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  • I want kids. Maybe 2-4 if G-d allows. Maybe i won't have any.

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  • More from Guys
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What Girls Said 26

  • I actually used to want 4 or 5 kids when I was around 14. Lol.

    At this age, I still want kids. 2 boys. Preferably twins. Although, I'd still love a girl [or girls] if I was ever to have kids.

    *In like 5+ years.* Let me find the right man first.

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  • I wouldn't ever wanna bring kids into this sad shitty world. But omg recently I've been having so many dreams about being pregnant its really freaking me out like hell. I think its telling me something. Probably to never have unprotected sex in my life 😂😂 I REALLY DON'T WANT KIDS LOOL. Better not fucking happen.

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    • in sorry I'll stay outta ur dreams for now on

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    • i'll be super rich and great looking and will only have sex with hookers, not letting any girls or their stupid tantrums and emotions get in my way in life @BlueCoyote

    • @BlueCoyote lol fyi I have been suicidal... I never said there aren't good things in this world. Of course there is. Going out for dinner with my friends is a good time, cuddling with my dog is a good time lol. But honestly I'd rather not live than live if I could choose. But OFC I'm not gonna do that to my friends and family so instead I'll just live life and find happy things in life that I can do.
      But I wouldn't wanna bring kids into it. But that's just how I see it. I'm not just going to live oblivious to the horrible things that do happen in this world and pretend like those problems don't exist, that's just not me.

  • I don't want kids. Thankfully, neither does my boyfriend. That caused a lot of difficulties when I was still dating, as most guys want kids at some point, so I'd usually only get about a month in before that topic would come up and we'd realize there's no point in continuing (or they'd assume they could get me to change my mind).

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  • I really really did not want kids, but I was stupid and ended up pregnant anyway. I didn't want to abort the baby and I know I would never be able to give my baby away so I kept him. I still dont want kids, bur the one son I have is enough to last me a life time. If I could go back and change the past I probably would, but only if I knew for sure that I would still end up with James but have him when I was much older. The very first thing I said after I had finneshed giveing birth was... Oh my god never again... and I am sticking to my guns ha ha.

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  • I didn't at your age, but starting to feel a bit more like it now, like I can feel a bit clucky haha but ideally want to be settled and be with someone for like 3-5 years and get married before that.

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  • i want a baby NOW! 😠

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  • I know there are people out there who don't. You're not alone Apple!

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  • I don't see myself having kids either and feel like I have way to many problems. So I couldn't handle giving a child any kind of focus.

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  • There are many that don't.

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  • I think it's fine not to want kids, but what's not fine is to get a girl pregnant and refuse to look after the child because you told her to get an abortion. If you do have a child, whether you'd like to or not, you must look after it.

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  • The thought feels weird to me too. I don't exclude the possibility, but it's hard to think of myself as a mom :))

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  • I might want a kid someday. I would be able to deal with being pregnant, but I don't know maybe if we adopted or if she went to a sperm bank and carried the baby. I haven't ruled it out yet.

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  • i dont like the idea of kids now and i try not to think about it :P it just terrifies me lol but I do want kids at some point, just not in the near future haha

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  • I have no choice in the matter I can't have them.

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  • I sure as hell dont want kids. I knew since I was a kid that I didn't want any ever.

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  • Yeah I definitely don't want them

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  • Nope. Don't want kids.

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  • I definitely don't want kids. Fuck that lol

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  • I do not want kids
    I do not plan on having kids

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  • I don't want any either

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  • Yes, yes I do very much so.

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    • I'll give u two in one shot

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    • there is a race more subhuman than indians and arabs, guess what n?

    • "I'm having orphan's kids."

      I love how that sounds

  • I want to, sure.

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  • No I don't want kids, usually people frown upon me when I say that in front of them and they act so perplexed.

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  • I have a daughter

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  • I have two and they like grow up. Maybe the answer is I do not want more.

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  • Same! No kids for meee!

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