How can we tell our neighbor that we don't want to talk to her?

Let me explain me and my boyfriend's personalities:
Shy, socially awkward, have social anxiety, private people, keep to ourselves, homebodies

Now with that being said, we are more than willing to say hello to our neighbors in passing. We don't mind if they want to have a small conversation when we first move in to get a feel for us. However, we just moved into this apartment last week and already there's someone who won't leave us alone.

She is almost always outside and we can't go out without her talking to us. It's always something weird she has to say and she wants to ask way too many questions about our personal lives. It's gotten to the point that we avoid going out the front door unless we have to.

Really, we just want to walk our dogs or go to work without being bothered. We didn't move in here to make friends, we moved in because we needed a home.

Is there any way we can let her know that we don't want to talk to her without being rude or starting drama?


0|0
3|17

Most Helpful Guy

  • Stop being autistic, start being social. It makes sense that people should know their neighbors, and even be friends with them. You have every right to be shy, and introverted people. God knows I am one too. But your neighbors are the people who live closest to you, the people you should be able to turn to the fastest and easiest should you need help, and the people you need to at least stay on a pleasant enough relationship with to avoid problems. Trying to pretend the world doesn't exist because you don't want to deal with people is foolish. Humans are social animals, and every human civilization is based on a community, which starts with the people who live close together. If you want nothing to do with other people, find a house in the country where there is no one around on either side for a dozen miles.

    1|3
    0|0
    • She doesn't have to be social...

    • Show All
    • Actually I said we have no problem saying hello in passing. My problem is the weird "hey how are you, my dog just ate a condom what should I do?" conversations. It's weird, and I would really like to go on about my day without having to stop for a 10 minute conversation where I feel uncomfortable the entire time. That doesn't make me autistic.

    • no, i suppose if that is how they act, it really doesn't say anything about you that you would feel compelled to avoid them I suppose.

Most Helpful Girl

  • You should not feel like prisoners in your own house. I dont know if she is just trying to be friendly or if she is nosy but if you want this to stop just carry your lives on as normal but dont stay and answer all the questions, just a hello and sorry i am busy sort of thing. She should get the point after a bit and is polite enough way

    0|1
    0|0

What Guys Said 16

  • well i think you need to consider how much time is she really taking up when she makes conversations. if it is signfiicant then i think you should make an effort to converse with her at times and then not others

    0|0
    0|0
  • No, not really. Howvere, if you keep conversations short, she will eventually realize that you aren't very sociable.

    Still, I think it is in your best intetests to change yourselves because being social is a critical survival skill; you never know when you need assistance in an emergency.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Some ideas.

    Pretend you're not a native speaker. Can't talk.

    Give weirdly conflicting answers. You say your married. He says you're brother and sister. Etc. He says your pregnant you say you're known to be infertile.

    Pretend to be deaf. Make her WORK when she talks to you. ,"What? Can you repeat that?" "No I've never been to Milwaukee" in response to are you taking a walk?

    Always yell, "I'm late, gotta go!

    0|0
    0|0
  • Nope there is no way to tell your neighbor that you don't want to talk to her, without being rude or starting drama.

    If she says hi, either don't give eye contact and keep on about your way, or say "can't talk now" and just walk away promptly.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Sounds like my neighbour. I've learned that I will be trapped in unending conversations with him unless I excuse myself and leave.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Don't

    Talk

    to

    her?

    Is it really this hard to be a woman? I mean maybe this is why most women don't do their own car repairs, because who fucking knows what to use when you need to unbolt something the 1/8 in with socket or 1/2in with 1/8in adapter and socket. Fuck. My oil is draining out all over the floor but I got too confused to finish the job so I went in and watched dr Oz.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Just say you don't have time right now or that you just came back and want to chill on your couch and then move out/into your apartment.

    0|0
    0|0
  • i have a neighbor like this. just promptly excuse yourself after a minute. (usually you have to interrupt them to do so).

    if that makes you "feel bad" then get over it.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Tell her that you are satanic cultist missionaries looking for some converts. She'll leave you alone as well as everyone else as well.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Just be true, i won't be saying, blah blah blah, be yourself and another blah blah, not really, be true, be "frontal" like we say in my country, you always should say what you think, even if you hurt, or kill with your words, at least you've never been a fake person, think about it, just say to that person "Im sorry, but im not into talking to you, i don't know, i think there is something in you that i dont like, you have to respect that, i think its better that we should stop talking"

    0|0
    0|0
  • No. To your bottom question.

    0|1
    0|0
  • dont make eye contact and just keep walking

    0|0
    0|0
  • it doesn't matter what you say, it will create issues. just avoid them when you can.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Just be blunt with it and tell them how it is. It's best that way

    0|0
    0|0
  • You disnt have to tell. Just dont speak.

    0|0
    0|0
  • I know this feelings some neighbors just wanna hatefully hug u lol. especially old ones just say NO to them they will understand

    0|0
    0|0

What Girls Said 2

  • Say hello, and say you're in a rush to go somewhere or your dog really needs to go. I hate nosy neighbors myself.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Gosh, you guys are so mean

    0|0
    0|0
Loading...