Are mens attempts at dominance an attempt to reassure themselves that they have control, in spite of feeling powerless in the face of beautiful women?

After seeing comments from men such as the following...

"How does a boy learn to bridge the gap between [a woman's] power and his feelings of powerlessness? To make him feel less like a puppy dog begging for a morsel?" - Warren Farrell

"I felt completely powerless against women.. I knew they could make me do anything because I wanted them so bad."

... I asked a couple questions.

http://www.girlsaskguys.com/other/q2043702-guys-do-you-ever-feel-inferior-in-the-face-of-the-allure-power-of-a "Guys, do you ever feel inferior in the face of the allure and power of a sexy woman?" and 50% of men said yes.

http://www.girlsaskguys.com/other/q2023908-do-you-ever-feel-powerless-in-comparison-to-the-other-gender Only 17% of men reported feeling powerful in comparison to women, whereas 45% reported feeling powerless.

I wonder: Could this be why so many men historically & presently try to act dominant and/or superior? Is it an attempt to comfort themselves & assure themselves that they do have power?

  • 100% !!!
    17% (2)4% (1)8% (3)Vote
  • yeah
    8% (1)8% (2)8% (3)Vote
  • for most men, probably
    8% (1)17% (4)14% (5)Vote
  • maybe // for some men
    42% (5)17% (4)25% (9)Vote
  • probably not. men probably act dominant/superior for other reasons. (please tell me what they are)
    8% (1)17% (4)14% (5)Vote
  • no. men act dominant/superior because they ARE dominant and superior!
    17% (2)37% (9)31% (11)Vote
And you are? I'm a GirlI'm a Guy
Updates:
40% of guys here say that men are superior?/ wtf.

"Nature has given Woman so much power that hte law has very wisely given her very little." - Samuel Johnson, 18th century
Boys?

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Men do not act dominant and superior because they feel helpless and weak around women, they do it to attract women because this is what women want, wether women admit to this fact or not. Men have always been devoted to women thats why they can work themselves near to death, as they have done through out all of history, and then give the entire fruit of their labor over to women. Its why they died for women. This notion that men try to dominate women and control them is idioticly stupid as is evident by literally everything in our entire society from the gendered laws benefiting women to the practices that require men to sacrifice all they have worked for for women to laying down their vary lives. Where did you get this notion that men try to dominate women? The only time a man does that is to because he thinks a woman will responde positively to it since that is what women want in a man a leader some one who seems to have his shit together and is willing to take what he wants because those attributes imply strength status and by extention the ability to provide and protect her.

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    • In several countries, wifebeating is considered acceptable by a majority of the population

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    • Yes now lets look at the male half. Bacha Bazi where male children have to whore themselves out in order to provide food and shelter to their able body mothers. Men who go to prison because they can't afford to pay the taxes on their wifes income (hence so many beign against women working because they are not allowed to use the money to provide for the family ie it belongs to her and her alone and she has no social or legal obligation to care for the family but he is absolutely obligated to pay the taxes on it or go to prison (in fact this has been exploited by women to get their husbands arrested and imprisoned). As for the abuse what a woman feels and what is happening are two very different things ie what are the statistics and what are the statistics for female on male spousal abuse. For instance in the US we have laws against domestic violence against women and portray men as violent towards women all while statistical evidence shows women are actually far more likely to be

    • perpetrators of domestic violence (to both their husbands and children). So this was what I was trying to get at, its sexist because you ignore the entire other half of the society ie men. Look at what they said if a woman fails at her duties as a mother and wife she is disicplined by the husband (or rather she believes he has the right to do so). What happens if he fails in his duties as a husband and father? He gets imprisoned or publicly stoned or flogged etc. So again, your ignoring half the data. Like killing cheating women, Your completely ignoring the fact that the man was expected to work himself to death on her behalf, to stand and fight and die and sacrifice himself for her the only thing she was required to do was be faithful to him. So when she failed at that the punishment was sever because he lost years of his life of his work because of her. Its also why a man would suffer the same fate if he stopped providing for his family. So again you ignored the other half.

Most Helpful Girl

  • I think people generalize way, way, WAY too much here.

    For most normal people, 99 percent of interaction between the sexes -- whether platonic or romantic -- doesn't carry any significant element of "power play". Which is why those few select interactions that DO have those elements, are so noticeable, and why those few interactions tend to burn a hole in our brains that's bigger than life.

    I mean, consider this (seemingly frivolous, but perhaps not) question, along with my response to it:
    www.girlsaskguys.com/.../q2044347-men-love-hearing-a-girl-gagging-on-his-dick-whats-the-female

    Okay, part of the point here is to put in a shameless plug for that opinion (which I thought was a very good answer, lol).
    But the other part is to illustrate that both of those moments -- the one in the original question, and the one in my opinion response -- are TRANSIENT. They last but a moment. They have the power of pure rapture on the other person, but their duration is literally measured in seconds.

    Do these reflect the way either party feels OVERALL?
    Not really...

    I mean, these kinds of moments aren't even necessarily a reliable barometer for how either partner feels about **that specific relationship**. Let alone how they feel about the entire opposite sex across the board, lol.

    Do they signify *something*? Sure. On some level, literally every behavior signifies... *something*.

    But, to think anything can be generalized therefrom, is foolishness.

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What Guys Said 16

  • I think men and women have equal power until women exercise theirs: Men ask you out, men get your number, men hit you up, men make the dates, men pay for the dates, men ask you to marry them, etc. implying that men cater to women.

    On the contrary, I have the power to refrain from doing any and all of those things, and only a few women would want to be assertive with men in the ways I just described. Therefore, most women concede their power to men by refusing to take initiative and waiting for men to make moves

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  • Nope naturally we're just use to asserting dominance. While it is muted in modern society for the most part, go look at a jail environment... If you lock a bunch of men in a room, there will be a social order established. There will be the strong and the weak. The strong will size up new comers to see how much of a spine they have. They want to know how much that person can be trusted and relied upon. Are they an asset to the group or a liability. Rules will be established among men and if someone steps out of line it will be handled.

    As far as your entire powerless to beautiful women thing... That's bullshit poets tell women to get them to drop their panties. They tell them what they want to hear, and get to fuck the girl they want to fuck. In the end it's a game of manipulation by the poet and the girl walks away thinking she was the one that was strong. :p

    We can love a particular girl, care for her, be vulnerable to her, and trust her but it's not because she's sexy it's because she's good to us...

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    • "That's bullshit poets tell women to get them to drop their panties. They tell them what they want to hear, and get to fuck the girl they want to fuck."

      Lol... When I hear that men feel powerless in the face of beautiful women, it encourages me NOT to drop my panties... Because it seems that withholding the goodies is what brings power. (Making a man work for it, etc.)

    • Eh a lot of girls want to believe the guy isn't going to run off after sex, so a little sentimental crap lubricates the gears.

  • Not to be that guy, but your polls use very poor sampling methods. First of all, they're voluntary response. OK, that's really what makes all the issues. To use G@G, one is generally a certain sort of guy, so the poll only describes the population of male G@Gers, not all men. Second, because people chose to participate in your poll instead of being randomly chosen, the poll only describes male G@G users who were online when your poll was open and visible who cared enough to answer. You're really looking at a small, non-representative group of men. Sorry, not trying to be a poop, I'm just trying to educate on proper statistics.

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    • Of course, but this is the best I can do atm. I'm not trying to be totally scientific.

  • Depends. Dominance as in a naturally displayed authority, no. Dominance in terms of being controlling and such, yes.

    It really depends on the context and the individual.

    That being said, many women don't realise how much power they have over men which goes beyond any physical strength. Its natures way of balancing the power of the sexes - just that most women these days dont realise it and those who do abuse that power.

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    • if nature wanted to balance power everyone would just be equally strong and attractive.

    • @Azara

      If nature wanted for us to be equal, we would be hermaphrodites. There are quite a few species who are. But we aren't. Instead we are one of the species with the biggest sexual dimorphism in nature.

  • I think any time a person tries to assert themselves or tell you how great they are at something, I think they're feeling weak. If you are that good at something or that successful, you won't have to say it, people will just know.

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  • It's more of a fact that society conditioned men to be the 'assertive alpha male' type of men... even though most of us aren't that... nor want to become that.

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  • Men assume dominance because they are dominant.
    Those quotes you used as an example sound like they came from some seriously disturbed manginas with mommy issues.

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  • I think this kind of desperation is entirely cultural.

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  • i think it has more to do with how the current generation was raised. to be little pussies.

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    • I'd have to disagree with you there... they were raised to be big pussies... not little ones.

  • Nah. I'm dominant because I'm just a boss.

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  • True dominance isn't made in attempts.

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  • Dominating people... gets boring.

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  • no. men act dominant/superior because they ARE dominant and superior!

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  • Powerless in the face of beautiful women? Bwhahaha those ''beautiful women'' still sit on the toilet, sweat, burp and get snotty noses just like everyone else... so no.

    Women cannot control men, they can only control boys and simps.

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  • Shows how bitter women are here, they'd want you to pau for first date to see if they provide andthen make this lol

    Thank god women are calmer and happier irl

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    • Relevant to both your point about paying for dates, & my question altogether:

      "We men are sad creatures and women are truly the rulers of this Earth... If you are a woman, you are born in control, whether you know it or not. Men stare at you, men think about you, men want you.

      That’s why it’s so ridiculous that so many women commonly have a low self esteem. Guess what? It’s not you who should be worried about being undesirable, it’s the entire male population! We ask /you/ on dates, we ask /you/ to marry us, we pay for /your/ meals, we hold the door open for /you/. Do you understand what I’m saying? Women are so goddamn superior to men that we cater to them /all the time/. We’re basically their servants." - Onision https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oLaymqDFa3c

    • You just explained my whole point yourself actually lol

  • Maybe in some respect

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What Girls Said 5

  • I think men are encouraged to behave in a dominant manner because women are generally attracted to that. I do think that men sometimes act superior or have false confidence because they are intimidated by an attractive woman. It isn't unusual for people to do that. I've acted superior when I've felt intimidated as well.

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    • "I feel like I'm the worst so I always act like I'm the best" - Marina and the Diamonds

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    • I'm actually legit. No offense or anything.

  • no. women can feel the same attraction for men. they dont try to control them whenever they get horny.

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    • people act tough when they feel threatened. its vey common. nothing special. guys do it more bc ultimately women control life. so guys inherently carry around that insecurity and try to control women as a mens of controlling life.

  • Especially macho type men. They usually have a low self esteem and try to compensate that with dominant behaviour.

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  • For some probably.

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  • I hope it's the last one.

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    • Why? Are you attracted to male dominance & don't like the idea of it being merely a facade?

    • Yeah, I think females are naturally submissive and males are (hopefully) naturally dominant. That's how it should be, at least.

    • I'm thinking maybe the reason women more often act submissive is because they don't feel like they have to compensate for any powerlessness.

      One guy said:

      "There's a feeling of dearth that comes with being a man and it's completely alien to women... Women have innate value, you don't. You always have to prove yourself."

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