I don't want to hold any guy's hand before marriage. How do I tell that to my dance instructor?

I am a virgin and I also don't want to kiss, make prolonged eye contacts or hold hands with any guy who is not my lawfully wedded husband. I'm talking ballroom dancing this summer and I want to be paired up with a female.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Its just dance. A lot of people take ballroom but if you're concerned, see if your dad or brother or a male cousin will take the class with you. But really, it's just holding hands for bits and pieces of time while dancing. I give my good guy friend long hugs sometimes and it doesn't mean I'm being disloyal to anyone. That's the good thing about being single:) Saving kissing and sex for marriage is great, but holding hands is a bit extreme. But if you really don't want to, just ask to be paired with a girl

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What Guys Said 11

  • I love your idea but not holding anyone's hand is a bit to far if your going to take dancing lessions. The best way to talk to him about it is to just do it but do it with confidence. That being said sometimes a dance instructor just has to show you how to dance himself. I'm glad to hear that your setting boundaries for yourself until your wed. Several of my female freinds also do that however not holding hands is really hard not to do when your learning how to dance. Try getting a female instructor for it. As for not making prolonged eye contact will be harder because it is often something that a person does when they are infatuated with someone. They just can't help but look at them. Also when on a date when you really like someone and you two have run out of things to say they often just look at each other. Or soul gaze which helps reinforce those feelings of love.

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  • Are you gay?

    Are you afraid that touching a man's hand will cause you to get wet and you will suddenly start taking off your clothes in front of people?

    Maybe you are a strict Moslem, in which case, you shouldn't be dancing anyway, you should be shopping for a burka.

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  • Tell him you're cuckoo for coco pops. If he doesn't understand, show him the crucifix necklace the size of a container ship's anchor that you undoubtedly wear around your neck.

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  • thats fucked up, because if your going to be like that, you won't get a guy or merry in the first place.

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  • You're in the wrong class hunny. Ballroom is about male and female.

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  • Ol have fun dieing single

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  • In what country are you?

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    • Canada.

    • Show All
    • @Brooklyn123 You are a disgrace to Canada if you have trouble respecting other people's opinion and lifestyle choices.

    • Some Candians (like yourself) don't respect people lifestyle choices (me being trans for instance) either.

  • HAHAHAHAHA

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  • What guy in his right mind..

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  • I think you're being a bit over dramatic. The eye contact one is also a bit ridiculous. What are you going to do during an interview or normal conversation with a guy, not look at him? I can see not having sex before marriage but not kissing until after marriage is and will be a deal breaker for most, if not all guys. I don't think you should do dancing if you won't hold hands with the guy dancer. That what dancing is -_- And chances are the guy's gay so, you shouldn't be worrying.

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    • I'm going to say also that the reason you have this problem is due to your parents brainwashing you into thinking kissing, holding hands and eye contact is a terrible thing to do.

  • Maybe you should just stay home. You're being ridiculous.

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What Girls Said 8

  • You will literally never get married with that attitude.

    Unless you're on board with an arranged marriage your parents set up.

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  • I'm not sure how would not even making eye contact will work out, esp if you're going out on a date. It's one thing to inform the guy you're waiting till but what you're demanding for is nonexistant. Might as well stay at home and continue waiting in your chair.

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  • Yeah, good luck with that. You might as well live under a rock.

    There's nothing wrong with gazing at someone or holding their hand in the first place, much less a ballroom dancing class!

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    • It was a serious question.

  • I can't tell if you're being serious or not.

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  • She's definitely not serious, right?

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    • It was a serious question.

    • No one can help you

  • You took complicated to the next level. Can a guy not breathe the same air as you either?

    You can tell your instructor but you most likely won't get any special treatment. Kiss that hand virginity goodbye.

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  • You can't be serious? You do know you would have to make eye contact at some point right?

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