Why am I bad at getting others to respect me?

I think a lot of it traces back to childhood. I'd watch my dad treat my mother as though she's nothing. And a lot of that time that behaviour would pass on to me too. I remember being called a bitch when I was 16 and driving to a new school.

As an adult too, in University. I just sort of almost didn't know how to make others respect me or would do things to make them stop respecting me almost because I was afraid of that respect.

It doesn't help that I already feel inferior. I used to be a good student with good prospects. Then all the shit at home caught up to me, as it always does. Now I feel like a loser. And I almost think it's okay for others to not respect me because I'm no one for them to respect.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Respect is something you have to earn, nobody is going to give you respect simply because you demand it. Respect is not your birth right.

    Sometimes even if you do things that you think are worth respecting you for some people will still not respect you. That's how life is, you just need to ignore such people who don't respect you despite you having done things worth respecting.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • How do you know they don't?

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What Guys Said 2

  • Well respect is not something anyone is entitled to. It has to be earned. So many people think that respect is a god given right to them and it's not. The very fact that they aren't being respected is proof that it's not.

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  • You just need to do something worth respecting. Good luck

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    • 3mo

      I don't agree with you telling asker that she needs to do something worth respecting.

      I think the problem is more that she doesn't have a high sense of self-esteem and tolerates people.

What Girls Said 1

  • Because for most, respect is something that is earned, not given.

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