Guys, Should I go to the school about some nasty messages I received from another student?

Long story short, there was this girl that I had a bit of drama with last year who I was initially friends with, but we ended up parting ways, not speaking to each other again.

We see each other at school, I act like I don't know her, and although I'd like to think she'd do the same, I do occasionally catch wind of her saying nasty shit about me to people.

But anyways, back to what has happened.
I was talking to a guy friend of mine, nicknamed 'Orphan' as you'll see on messenger. He was at a party, and from what he said, his phone was taken by this girl that dislikes me, and some of her friends. This girl's friend who I refer to as 'Loxton' then proceeded to send me these messages as shown in the images.

Guys, Should I go to the school about some nasty messages I received from another student?
(also, when he says 'Chia seed rolls' he's referring to the school councillor by the nickname students have given her, who I see occasionally related to anxiety).

The strange thing is, I've never done anything to this girl, or her mate Loxton, and it's so out of the blue. My parents want to go to the school, however I'm unsure as to whether it's worth it with the retaliation etc. It did bother me a lot though.
What do you think?

Updates:
3mo Sorry, I've realised that I accidentally selected 'guys only' opinions, if any girls are reading this, feel free to inbox me your thoughts.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • I feel like the best option here is to essentially put this person on your ignore-in-school list (aka "shit list") and ignore her. Reporting people may cause more drama as you'll get unjustly labeled as a tattletale or whatever, and she'll make sure to spin that into a story. I feel like she is wanting you to either get riled up or feel like crap, so ignoring her is the best option that will annoy her the most-- showing that you give no cares.
    You know who you are, and whatever she thinks is as powerful as me saying that the sky is neon pink at all times. (Aka it's not)

    Was she romantically involved with this dude at some point and is just over obsessive and controlling? It seems kind of bizarre for someone just to hate on you that much. I mean, the dude isn't spreading crap about you around to people, is he?

    I would be aware that there is the potential for her/her friends to be spreading crap about you around school. Them directly confronting you to bully would be worst. Luckily, you seem to have dealt with the lies well, but it's just something to take note of. If you have a solid friend group though, you can stick/rely on them through this.

    So I would ignore it now, put them on your shit list, but just be aware of them in school. Kind of like a keep your "friends close but enemies closer" situation, except more so a "keep your friends close and your enemies at a safe distance to kinda ignore them while still keeping them in check."

    Now if they escalate this situation, I'd say that is when it's time to seek help-- when the problem becomes bigger than what you can manage alone.

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    • 3mo

      Thanks for your advice :)
      The girl in question is dating one of this guys friend, but it does seem a little bizarre that he's getting involved in a fight that isn't his. One of my friends called him 'her little guard dog'.

      Yes I believe they may have said a few things about me, but nothing too reputation damaging as of late.
      I really just have to be the bigger person than them and keep my head up.

Most Helpful Girl

  • Ignore her, she is Bratty and Catty, @Luci92, and Very... Jealous.
    This is Not the First, nor the Last of the, here, dear, who will Be Extending Claws and Paws and All, so either get Used to it or Be forever Trying to Fight with these Sorts of Sorted People.
    Stay clear of her, for the More you Make of her, the More she will always Feel she Has the upper Hand Deal to Slam dunk you with your Good Name.
    Good luck and No, Keep it to yourself, don't even Talk her Name, for Word always gets Back to a Bitch. xx

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    • 3mo

      Oh, sorry, hun, didn't mean to be Pink on this one. lolxx

What Guys Said 28

  • Well that's fucked up :/ No one should death on another human being.

    If I were you, I would just ignore it. You're always gonna have haters, so ignoring them is the best thing to do, after all it's just words. Sure, they're nasty words, but you don't have to put any importance to them if you don't want to.
    Going to the school would just bring more drama and more hate. Ignoring it would just push this incident apart and for you it will mean that you aren't gonna let it bother you, and for her/them, it would mean that you don't care about what they say or think about you, which subconsciously will put them in an inferior position, cause they're coming at you while you're ignoring them. A superior being doesn't care what an inferior thinks of them.

    She's just being a bully, and the way to fight a bully is by not fighting, just moving on.
    I've had people try to bully me in school, but I NEVER let it bother me, I just laughed it off and with a simple look I let them know I was better than them. You don't know how much a cocky look hurts a bully xD They never tried it again, cause I showed them I was better than them, that some mere insults weren't gonna affect me.

    Just ignore them. Move on with your life, and always keep your head up. NEVER let them see you be intimidated by them.

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    • 3mo

      That's true, you've raised some very good points, thank you for your opinion 😊

  • I just wanted to say im very sorry that your going through this with that girl. What she said to you was wrong and messed up. She is so jealous over you and player hating on you for no reason. She crossed a lot of lines with what she said. Everybody pretty much sumed up what you should do. I just hope this girl isn't in any of your classes? The most obvious thing to do would be to get her in trouble some kind of way. She had no right to say what she said to you.

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    • 3mo

      Thank you very much, that means a lot. :)
      Luckily, she is in none of my classes.

    • 3mo

      Your very welcome. Im glad she isn't in any of your classes. You seem so nice to me. Nobody should be mean to you. And they have no right to.

  • Tbh I just would block them on facebook and ignore them. If you are actually 17 you probably don't even have a year of school yet. After school ends you don't have to see these people again and reporting stuff like that often just leads to more bullying.
    Most people bully others to get a reaction and make themselves feel superior which is mostly driven by them having troubles. If you just shrug it off and ignore it eventually they will realise that you don't care and leave you alone.

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    • 3mo

      I already blocked the person who sent those messages, but he sent it on a friend's account from his phone that he took. I'm just glad I didn't retaliate, though how can you to something like that?
      Unfortunately I've got a year and a half of school left though :/

    • 3mo

      Yea, still a year and a half isn't that long really.
      There will always be people out there who are dicks and you just have to kinda deal with it. It kinda sucks in school when you only have a smaller group of people to hang out with but eventually people like that are the ones who end up with no friends in college because nobody likes someone who is constantly talking shit behind peoples back.

    • 3mo

      Exactly. Good to know.

  • Yep. High school is a battlefield with mandatory conviction.

    Basically, yes, report it, ALL OF IT and provide the story without any additions or alterations - provide the full truth. If you can document it, do so.

    I have dealt with scumbags back in school and I did not hesitate to report one of them. I have dealt lesser with bullies since then as they couldn't cross the line anymore.

    Take the chance and report her now! Kids like these need lessons the hard way.
    But do NOT contact her! You'd only ruin your plan.
    Take this practice to your own experience and benefit and learn how to report in general. It will serve you very well!

    And screw what everybody else thinks about this (snitch, blah blah): They are being idiots. You're not one of them.
    You can handle it like a true adult.

    Girls cannot see your question at all. You might want to close this question and duplicate it, open to both genders.

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  • Either show the screenshot to the teacher you have the best relationship with and ask them to keep it quiet, or just don't tell anybody. This kind of girl feeds off drama. She wants stuff to happen, good or bad, just so she has someone looking at her and the excuse to open her whore mouth.

    Wow, I got a bit heated there, but you get the idea. Just ignore it.

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  • That's awful who the fuck encourages suicide 😧? But sometimes it takes courage not to stoop down to someones level it makes you look better as a person. People will be cruel to someone behind a text on a phone or message on a computer, but they won't say it personally why because they're cowards if you're going to insult me say it to my face. I'm not encouraging to start a fight what I'm saying is that it's really not worth it childish stupidity she's doing and just makes her look like an ass 😁 but seriously don't let it bother you she has an ugly persona she needs to work on there's a saying "what comes around goes around" what's she's doing to you might come back to her with someone else she might not be able to handle it like you did don't stress over it laugh at it move on and keep your head up 👍.

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  • If it were me I'd retaliate pretty badly. But that's cuz im a male probably haha. I'd make that bitches life so miserable she'd be an insomniac the rest of her life.

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    • 3mo

      That sounds like women's behavior...

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    • 3mo

      If people talk shit, i give them a short response and move on.

    • 3mo

      @HulkkSmash she's done that already and this chick had no reason to do this.

  • I m not so sure, if it's girl or that boy who's behind all this. Here's what i have done and you should do:
    1. Ping that girl and ask if she sent you that message (very carefully examine how she responds, is she rude or bieng polite, or in between
    A. She says yes
    take a screen shot of her accepting that. Close chat.
    B. She says no
    . Send her the screen shot above , and ask her about it,
    there are two possibilities
    If she ask who did that then ask her to go to that with her
    If she says no (dont trust yet)
    she is lying, then ignore this whole shit, she is too chicken , don't waste time
    go to school and report it
    If she say yes (dont trust yet)
    confront that son of a bitch in front of a class and then report him to school.
    2. Either way, you must talk to that guy. And take some male friend with you just in case.
    3. Report it anyways.
    4. The Prestige.
    Fuck everything up from that bitch to that son of a bitch. Set their ass on fire.
    Now give me my MHO😛

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    • 3mo

      It was both, and my friend who's phone was taken explained that it was both of them. Thanks for your opinion, might get MHO if you're lucky 😝

    • 3mo

      Then its The Prestige.😜 I want MHO , give me MHO😈

  • That girl seems to have a mental problem. Too much weed or another drug maybe?

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    • 3mo

      Agreed, I believe she is legitimately a sociopath. She's not on drugs or anything, at least I don't believe so.

  • Yes absolutely and immediately.

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  • I don't know if your school has any cyber bullying policies but if they do yeah i'd inform the deans or whoever is in charge of discipline. What a beyotch she is.

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    • 3mo

      Yeah they have a lot of policies and procedures in place, and I'm on good terms with the head of senior school as well. Thanks for your opinion :)

  • Hmm that's the tough one of them all... to grass or not grass, that's the question... well in your situation I'd block him and then if he finds another way to contact you, then you should tell the school... The reason I wouldn't tell the school first is because if you get a prick for a listener to your story in the school staff, they'll tell you that they can't do anything because it hasn't happened on the school premises... good luck!

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  • I'd shoot her if she was a guy.

    Twist her nose stick it through her ass and make it come out of her mouth.

    And yeah do what you Gotta do

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  • Go to the school,
    I've seen what these kinds of things can lead to if they aren't dealt with

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  • Yes you definitely should go to authorities

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  • Damn thats ruthless. Women can be so mean. You handled that well though, I'm very surprised.

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    • 3mo

      Agreed, although it was the guy that actually sent it (she just encouraged him and didn't want to get her hands dirty).
      Thank you, but why are you suprised?

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    • 3mo

      Hey good for you. Seriously. Thats good.

    • 3mo

      Thank you :)

  • Your asking this again? 😞 Don't let it bother you there words don't let stupidity get to you people have said some sadistic stuff to me but hey i laugh maybe add some humor to it and move like one time some guy for some reason that didn't like me said that i was a fag i simply smiled and said "cool man I'll be sure to wear a shirt tomorrow that's say's fag just for you" 😊 he was confused i find it ammusing when people insult me it makes my day sometimes they say things that make them look retarded when they try to bash someone else. Be strong don't let stupid ass words drag you down keep your head up like i said in the last question keep your head up and know you're a way better human being than they are 😉

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  • You should let the school know so if something happens they are on your side

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  • Go to the school or punch the girl in the mouth.

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    • 3mo

      That'd be nice. Wish I could do that lol

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    • 3mo

      That means I'm lowering myself to their level. And as much as I'd like to, physical violence isn't the solution. She could very well get one of her mates to throw a couple punches at me too, and I don't want that.

    • 3mo

      Then go to the school.

  • That's a sex deprived bitch!.. You are having text conversation!.. He wants your pussy he is trying to put you down... Good luck

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    • 3mo

      What?

    • 3mo

      Not how it came out

    • 3mo

      That's a sex deprived bitch!.( that guy is a bitch) . You are having text conversation!. With. He wants your pussy he is trying to put you down... Good luck ( it one of those old alpha male!.. Dominant thing)
      Best course of action is to don't with a fuck about him..

  • Ouch...
    You can write a anonymous letter to the principal telling her name...

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  • Go to the school

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  • Do you feel threatened? What does Orphan say?

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    • 3mo

      He 'doesn't want to get involved'. He apologized that I had to go through that, and explained that they had taken his phone when he had put it down for a few minutes.
      I wouldn't ask him about going to the school, because he is party mates with this guy, and he might give him the heads up.

    • 3mo

      I think you should at least mention your concerns; informally at least to your guidance counselor, during a routine visit and don't leg Orphan know. At least the school will be given a heads ups, and if any sort of bullying happens they're be forewarned. Also, if anything happens, talk to Orphan and tell him about it and demand he tells his obnoxious buddy to back off. If he he refuses, he ain't for you.

    • 3mo

      Yeah I think that's what I'm going to do.
      Agreed about Orphan, if he doesn't want to 'get involved' and refuses to tell him to back off, then he definitely isn't for me. If it does come down to it, I've got another guy friend who I'm sure will stand up for me though.

  • No need to unless they threaten to kill you

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  • Yes, you should. always report bullying.

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  • Unless it happened during school hours on school premises, what relevance does it have to the school? I don't think they'll care about drama that takes place outside of school.

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    • 3mo

      Because it's a school student. In Australia that's what they usually encourage students to do if there's an issue, otherwise go to the police.

    • 3mo

      Ok. I'm in america.

    • 3mo

      Ahh okay, yep, I figured. I go to a private school as well, so they are meant to deal with a lot of these types of issues.

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What Girls Said 6

  • I think this is a tough situation. Its like bullying in the workplace it's usually the recipient that moves on as there is not much an employer or in this case the school can do. At worst they might disipline her but then you might not be the only one getting bullied so then if that is the case she could get into a lot more trouble.

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  • I think go to the school. Get her in some deep shit and make sure she knows that you ain't afraid to get help when it comes to rude bitches. Don't stop going to school cause of her. Rub in her face, the fact that you won't be effected by her bullshit.

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  • Don't go to school you're gonna look like snitch

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    • 3mo

      Well what else am I supposed to do? If I don't do anything it invites them to do it again, and I don't really care if I look like a snitch.
      In Australia, we're heavily encouraged to go to the school/cops about these issues, and it's actually illegal to tell someone to commit suicide here.

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    • 3mo

      It's still pretty nasty. And they weren't drunk. And I also don't want to lower myself to their level, retaliating like that won't help.

    • 3mo

      I'd do what I thought was best but I wouldn't tell on them

  • This is a very stupid situation. Hell how can someone do this when you did nothing to them?
    Just go to school and show yourself strong not weak and face everything with those bitches who deserve the biggest punishment ever

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  • Take it to the principal. Get that dumb cunt suspended.

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    • 3mo

      That's what my dad said 😕 thanks for your support

  • You really should

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