I smoked heroin for the first time yesterday. I don't know why I did it and can't believe I would do something that I promised myself I would never do. I ended up in the hospital because I was having horrible chest pains they had to give me something to slow my heart rate down as I was drinking alcohol and smoking heroin. I'm such an idiot. I never want to do it again but I'm just wondering why I even decided to do it.
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You aren't a horrible person. Maybe a naive person though , but hopefully this experience has made you wiser, and will give you more self-control so you don't do anything so dangerous again0