I have a co-worker who bullies me and I don't know what to do?

Yes I been to the manager and yes he favor him more than me. He made me cry a few days ago because he said I quote" I wasn't working." Which is totally wrong. He yelled at me in public and than he called me a bitch and of course I'll cuss him out. He thinks he superior than the rest of the worker eventhough we are in the same level and he never listen. He verbal agressive and demanding. And I admit I am a coward for obey at first. I am tired and I don't know what to do. ): There is a promise that he going to change department but he still working in our department. I honestly can't wait for him to leave my area of work. I don't know what to do. I cried several times and been yell at him and I have felt weak under him. I feel embarssed at how much I let him abuse me like that. And everyone see him as a great worker since they know him for about a year. Please, What can I do? At least tell me what to do to stop crying. I just can't anymore. I work in walmart.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • This is a tough one. First thing is not to get into a power struggle. As the quote goes, if you refuse to play the game, you're out of it. These kind of people are often relatively socially powerful or physically imposing, so you have to be careful in that regard. You don't want to fight him on his terms, as they say, he will fling more shit, he's well versed in it, and will actually enjoy it. Try and remain calm and aloof. Your manager has a legal responsibility to provide a safe working environment. You can threaten to escalate it with HR or the manager's manager (who incidentally, didn't deal with the issue, and so can get into trouble for that). Follow through and kick up a stink. Don't think you're not important enough for them to take notice. That's one of the mistakes you may be making. Your self image may be in tatters. You may put yourself underneath people like this bully, or be too willing to follow his orders or take to heart the shit he is saying. No one deserves to be treated like that. You have to value yourself. That will be part of the challenge.

    While I don't advocate violence, and this may be impractical for your situation, but I think learning martial arts can be very empowering. Knowing that you can beat the shit out of someone if they step over a line, you can protect yourself, your physical integrity. Of course, one should always learn to deal with problems without resorting to violence. But one learns so much about themselves from a martial art, that I think it makes you less inclined towards violence in the first place.

    The other thing is, try and take another perspective. Try and get out somewhere for the day, go for a walk, see some friends, visit somewhere. This experience, though very troubling, is just an experience, which will pass over you. Try and keep a higher perspective.

    Your integrity should not rest on this horrible bully's words. He just says horrible things because he's miserable with himself. Believe in yourself. Act decisively to make sure you don't have to put up with this. These experiences, though they are horrible, will make you a much stronger and more self assured person, if you let it.

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    • 2mo

      Another helpful tip when dealing with bullies. Again, what I was saying about a power struggle. If you react back emotionally and try and defeat him with stronger cruel words, it doesn't seem to work. Something might spark in him, if you say things like, 'why are you bullying me'. 'Why are you being so cruel', etc. Obviously, while standing firm, don't say it passively. Try and objectively describe his behaviour to him. In a funny sort of way, often these people don't realise the full impact of what they are saying. They make little justifications. Something may prick his conscience. Look him square in the eye, hold firm, and give the message that you're not going to tolerate it. You're not going to play that game.

    • 2mo

      This is great advice right here! I am so sorry you are going through this Apple! People can be so mean! I have no idea why this guy thinks he's the rooster of the roost, but he's nothing more than a bully! You are doing nothing to deserve this treatment! Sounds like this guy enjoys picking on people and unfortunately he has chosen you as his victim!

Most Helpful Girl

  • I'm so sorry you are going through this Apple! People are so vile sometimes! I think this guy is a bully and nothing more. Unfortunately your supervisor is favouring him for some reason.

    The thing you can do is document everything! If he says something to you, then go to your supervisor. Threaten to go to HR and report that your supervisor is not doing anything about it. You are well in your rights to make a big deal about this as it sounds like this is becoming a hostile working environment for you.

    Whatever you do, don't engage with him when he starts saying stuff. Walk away and report it immediately. If there are witnesses, see if they can report this as well. You are not doing anything to deserve the abuse. Try not to take it personally, though I know it is really hard.

    The problem is, this person seems really insecure. He needs a victim to pick on and to make them feel worthless in order to feel good about himself. That is really sad!

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What Guys Said 15

  • Ask for a transfer away from him. Threaten a lawsuit against Walmart if they don't do this for you. So many other people HAVE sued Walmart, they will believe you.

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  • Have your dad or brother get him after work and knock some fear into him.
    Ask to be transferred to another department/store.
    Ask your friend to meet you after work, than gang up on him.
    Find out who's in charge of your manager and report it to them.

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  • Would I would do is to be constructive but also positive in your communication. Tell him that be overthinking together the discussions you've had, you can repair the problem together.
    Tell him you respect his knowledge and experience on the one hand but tell him you want to work with him, not compete against him.
    Hopefully he'll realize he's gone too far and he'd be better off when respecting you :D

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  • Report it to the higher authority. In this case, corporate or whoever is in charge of your manager. Possibly even law enforcement. Your workplace is legally obligated to provide a safe environment for its employees. I would however suggest that once you get the higher authorities involved, you should immediately start searching for a new job.

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  • I'm sorry I'm gonna say it like this, but Walmart has a reputation for mistreating employees, and being rude to customers and not caring, so I'm not surprised for this rude behavior but you can change departments.. Any other just get away, you don't need this abuse.. or I think you'll be better working someplace else.

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  • No one likes to be bullied and that really sucks.

    I'll be honest with you when I was younger I had a manager who was fucking Satan! People couldn't believe what an asshole he was in my office was right outside of his. But you know what I put up with it and I stood up for myself and I'm a better person for it. Don't take no shit from no one!

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    • 2mo

      I know thats why I yelled back. I wish I didn't though. ):

    • 2mo

      OK try this talk to him alone I want you to still be safe but I want only you and him to hear the conversation this takes a lot of balls to take a deep breath looking right in the eye and tell him to quit talking to you like that. When it's just you and him the bullshit might be exposed.

    • 2mo

      he won't and I have.

  • Can you transfer to a different store?

    You can also call your HR department anonymosuly about his behavior

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    • 2mo

      HR? whats that? And I can't its the close I have to home.

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    • 2mo

      Well just tell them everything you can and what they will do is investigate the matter. If they notice the problem then they may coach or even write up that person.

      I should mention that there is a possibility they will side with the Manager instead of you though. I been there though, it sucks. If HR ends up doing nothing i would try hard to get another job elsewhere

    • 2mo

      Yeah I know ): I just can't stand him. This is the reason some guys have bad fame in my mind. He just a totally jerk. I can't... I almost decide to quit because he just impossible to deal with. I wish I wasn't so emotional.

  • Sneak into the break room and poison his lunch. Or sneak into the parking lot and cut his brake lines. Then claim battered wife syndrome (don't need to be married for it to be used) as a defense if you get caught. If he survives that will teach him a lesson. What I would do.

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  • Get a better job,

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  • Threaten the manager that you will go over their head unless they do something about it.

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  • Sounds like it's time to quit, but stand up for yourself you deserve better that also includes a better job without bullies (-^-^-)/

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  • Send over his details and I'll fite him for you dood.

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  • kick his stupid ass, stand up for yourself.

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  • I'm so sorry to hear it
    Go to your local autoparts store and buy a bottle of brake fluid
    Splash it on his car and his paint will melt right of

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  • report him to law enforcement.

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What Girls Said 7

  • I work in HR this guy should so be fired. Go to HR and file a complaint. If they don't do anything... you can sue the company. We just terminated a bully.

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  • I would totally stick my middle finger up in his face and say " shut up you work at walmart. is there better jobs where you live?

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  • That is sexual harassment my dear you and you can report that to your head manager.

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  • Try to sue Walmart. You will win.

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  • get a new job

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  • What were you doing to make him think that you weren't working?

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  • Wtf? Apple don't cry screw him! I've dealt with people like this just do your work and don't let negative people get you down.

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    • 2mo

      I know but he always in my face.

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    • 2mo

      Yea ):

    • 2mo

      Cheer up!😙❤ if you need me to kick some but I'll get bandit (my dog) to do it.

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