Guys, how would you feel if your fiance refused to sign a prenup?

Because she believe divorce shouldn't be on your mind at all when marrying?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • I would never refuse in the first place.
    But if my guy refused to sign a prenup, I probably wouldn't go through with the marriage.

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    • 2mo

      Wouldn't have expected you to say that. You were so sweet and romantic and trusting in your take...😔

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    • 2mo

      @MusicLover8098 Thanks :)

    • 2mo

      Thanks for mhg :)

What Girls Said 8

  • This is why I much prefer poor men. They're not as untrusting in this regard.
    I would rather date an unemployed man with no car and lives with his mom, than a man who doesn't trust me and makes 40k/yr with his own car.

    If you don't trust me, you should not marry me. It's as silly as those couples on Maury who go and get lie detectors. Their relationships are clearly hopeless.

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    • 2mo

      You're asking him to trust you with a loaded gun but you don't give him a loaded gun in return... It's not mutual trust, and that's the problem. A sort of reverse dowry the woman (or her family) have to pay the man in case of divorce would even things out a bit (btw some marriage contracts actually have this clause), plus guaranteed joint custody of any children.

      Besides not signing a prenup also means thinking about divorce already, it's the default choice but it's still a choice.

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    • 2mo

      Its not about trust. Divorce happens to even the best, and why not sign a prenup - if not getting divorced it would not matter if you have one.

    • 2mo

      @caver911 then I'm going to look through his phone everyday. If he has nothing to hide, it shouldn't matter right? No, that's crazy and shows you can't trust your partner.
      If the thought of divorce even crosses your mind, you're not for me.

  • This is for guys but personally, I wouldn't marry my partner if they refused to sign a prenup.

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    • 2mo

      Girls have proven time and time again that they cannot be trusted.

    • 2mo

      @_TidesOfTime_ Cool, dude. So have guys. Kinda a part of being human and how shitty we all are. I want a prenup regardless of my partner's gender.

  • Here's the thing - this isn't something that one of you should just throw at the other... it's one of many things that should be part of the discussions you have long before actually tying the knot... you should also be discussing things like what happens first one of you gets sick? Or loses your job? Or decides to try and start on a new career path? What if your plan to have or not have kids gets messed up?

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  • I'd be ok about it , because I'm financially stable and I have my own house etc. So I wouldn't need anything from him if we did get divorced. I'm very independent , so don't rely on anyone for financial security.

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  • I think lots of guys on here say they "wouldn't marry her" if she wouldn't sign the prenup, but would you really not? If you're in love enough to want to get married, would that be really all it took to forget the whole thing? I highly doubt it.
    The idea of this prenup business is much easier said than done.

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    • 2mo

      Does the same apply to her though?

    • 2mo

      Young women are manipulative and society allows them to be because it protects them. Men are guilty as a group of protecting stupid pretty women. Drop her, she is planning something. Most girls are selfish entitled creatures that make terrible friends. Have the time, these parasites don't even realize it. Plus, they are sociopaths, somehow, they manage to always make themselves look like the victim and the law lets them.

  • I would just tell her that you don't feel comfortable getting married without one. Maybe you could suggest just living together instead of getting married. You shouldn't be forced into a marriage without a prenup if it makes you uncomfortable.

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  • She should have no issue with it. Her lack of wanting to sign it would leave me to believe she's being shady. If she loves you it shouldn't matter.

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  • I wouldn't want to marry a man who asks me for one.

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What Guys Said 28

  • Well it kind of reminds me of something I read in a newspaper. A woman said the same thing to her husband then they married she cheated on him then took all of his money. The fact is the law always sides with the woman, always. So its perfectly understandable why a man wouldn't want to have a metaphorical loaded gun to his head (though considering that the suicide rate doubles after divorce maybe not that metaphorical) even if its a woman he trusts. If she is confident in her marriage and that she will always stick around and work things out she should have no problem signing a prenup because that would show how much she cares about the relationship that she will put it all on the line for you. So tell her that and don't let her dictate to you what you should or should not do the divorce rate is incredibly high and its almost always initiated by women so you have every reason to want a prenup, every one of those men who lost everything did not plan on loosing it did not plan on their wives divorcing them yet that's exactly what happened and they suffered immensely for it losing all that they spent their entire life trying to build and acquire.

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  • I'm not quite sure about the differences between a prenuptial agreement and a regular marriage contract (maybe you could explain this to me). In my country, things likes financial division of property in the case of divorce must be agreed upon in the marriage contract. So that's basically mandatory for everyone who gets married. So in this sense, a prenup seems unnecessary because it deals with the same questions as the obligatory marriage contract the way I understand it.

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    • 2mo

      Essentially the prenuptial agreement attempts to modify or more precisely specify terms in the case of a divorce vs. what would be the 'standard'. The 'standard' deal in divorce court has been heaviliy influenced by some lobby groups. In any case, it tends to have built into it certain assumptions, like if one partner was earning less, its because they 'sacrificed their career' to support their partner. And that may indeed some times be true. But in the case where someone wealthy, for instance, is marrying someone who earns far less, they may say 'look, you're not sacrificing a career, you can live with me and enjoy my lifestyle, but if you leave, you leave with what you brought, you don't get half the wealth I saved over this period, because my earning it was -not- based on having your 'support at home'. Or in cases where there is inherited wealth, quite often they may want to specify that the family money goes to any children, but not to ex-spouses.

    • 2mo

      @0112358 Ah yes, I see. Yes, that's usually an obligatory part of the marriage contract in my country (I know this because my girlfriend and I are planning to get married next year). If I remember it correctly, there are three standard ways a couple must choose from: A) all financial possession from before the marriage stay separated while the money you gain during the marriage is considered a big pot and divided equally in the case of a divorce, B) all possessions are put into a big pot and divided equally in the case of a divorce, C) all possessions stay clearly separated as though you had never married and they remain that way in a divorce.

      I think number C) makes sense for couples who are on very different financial levels (like a millionaire marrying some poor girl) but for most couples it seems a little too crazy. I think for me and my girlfriend, the first option (A) will probably be the best thing to do.

    • 2mo

      Oh but I almost forgot your question. So how would I feel if I lived in the US and my girlfriend didn't want to sign this kind of agreement? Well... weird I guess. I mean... thinking about divorce shortly before you get married is not a nice thing to do - but it's a reasonable thing to do. It's important to think about these issues during a time when you're happy and nobody's pissed at the other person. So I would definitely be worried... not just about myself but about my girlfriend as well. It's just not a good idea to postpone things like that.
      And that also goes for other issues too. For example my mom is now 60 and she's starting to think about what she wants to happen when she dies... with her body and her possessions and all that. Considering she's still very fit and healthy and probably far away from dying, that might seem weird. However, it's never a bad idea to spend some thought on these things because death sometimes comes unexpected and it's good to clear up things before.

  • I would think she's an idiot. You don't worry about death either at marriage, but you sure as fuck get life insurance. See if she'd be happy if you let all your insurance lapse on the wedding day. Oh wait, that would affect her financially, so she'd be pissed.

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  • Assuming she's proven to be vastly different from all women out there, and that I'd be adventurous enough and quite idiotic to propose to her, then prenup would definitely be a MUST for me, even though I'm very aware prenup isn't necessarily a live saver.

    If she says no, then she'd prove she ain't different from any other girl at all, so for me it's a take it or leave it sort of deal. Every reasonable man and woman should know by now no prenup, no marriage.

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  • Don't marry her then. It's for the protection of assets of both, that they brought to the marriage. It has nothing to do with what assets are aquired after the marriage.
    A woman that refuses a pre-nup is highly suspect. Especially in light of the way the entire divorce court favors women.
    If you actually have hard-earned assets, money or big stuff you own, and don't want to lose half of it in a divorce, then you want a prenup. Period.
    Chances are only 50-50 that you'll stay together anyway. Women up and leave at the drop of a hat. Surely you've heard the 'but I'm not haaaaapppy' mantra. [shrug]

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  • i'd feel she's a selfish bitch. there's a REASON women initiate 70% of divorce-there's BENEFIT to a woman in divorcing, UNLESS there's a prenup-then it's an even playing field.

    a man who marries without a prenup is a fucking idiot. and a woman who refuses one is not fair minded in the first place or she'd understand the mans' need for one-and she thus isn't marriage material in the first place.

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  • If my fiance refused to sign a prenuptial agreement, I would give her a hug and say "bless your heart love."

    Anyone that asks a fiance to sign a prenuptial agreement really does not want to get married and share in the full joy or burdens of a lasting relationship.

    Just my opinion

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  • I'm very against prenups myself, so I wouldn't even pitch one.

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  • My answer would be "if we're never going to divorce then the prenup won't matter anyway, now would it?"

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  • where i live divorces aren't as popular as in america and were catholic even though it happends sometimes, but if i were American a prenup would be a priority , no offense but American women are far from the kind of girl you want to start a family with and they will betray you in the blink of an eye.

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  • i would not marry anyone without a prenup, its not about not trusting the person i am going to marry but about the courts that i dont trust.

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  • Holler we want prenup! We want prenup!

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  • If she's not interested in anything long term, then dump her and go meet some new girls. There's no reason to keep something going with a girl that's marking you up as a meal ticket.

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  • I wouldn't marry her.

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  • I will make her sign it or otherwise I wouldn't marry her. And everyone who doesn't sign it is stupid as hell. Sorry to be so direct but its true. Sign it or don't marry her.

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  • I would feel that she is stupid if she not can see that signing a prenup before getting married is a good thing. Then you an focus on building things togheter from now and in future. Past is past and what she or you have managed in past, is of couse yourown - if a divorce happens. And if not divorcing i would beno problem, you share everything meanwhile.

    There is so much divorces so to not do it, would be very stupid for the one that has riches. If

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  • I wouldn't marry her.

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  • I would feel frustrated but if she wants to get married bad enough she will sign it, I can wait her out, lol.

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  • tell her her feelings of insult and hurt are worthless
    people change
    i m not getting fucked fianacially bc at any minute she can file for divorce and get 50/100 ore more of my money while she never worked a day in her life

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  • I would call off the marriage if that's the case. Shows I can't trust her.

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  • An ounce of prevention is better than a pound of cure- Ben Franklin

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  • Im not divorcing anyway

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  • I would think she is immature

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  • I'm not marrying her. I strongly believe marriage is a trap, she will strip the guy of his assets and property then once she's bored she will leave

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  • I wouldn't marry her.

    To me it shows she is only interested in what I have, and how much she can get if it doesn't work out.

    If she loved me for me, she would have no hesitation in signing.

    That said, it would be drafted to suit both of us - it has to be fair for both of us, and no alimony to be paid by either side, what was mine when we married is mine, what was hers is hers, what we earned during we split equally, and I will demand equal custody of any children.

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  • I would agree with her

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  • Then, I don't get married.

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  • I will love such a fiance!

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