How am I supposed to live knowing I'm a legit 0/10?

I message dozens of women each week on online dating sites and almost never get responses. Even the lowest of the low, the least attractive women I can find on the entire site, do not want anything to do with me. I just feel like deleting these accounts because of how futile it has become.

Its so crushing knowing that women don't even want to have basic interactions with me, let alone anything else. When by chance I meet a woman in real life I can see the revulsion bordering on hatred in their eyes, I can see how uncomfortable my presence makes them, I can see their shut off body language which is screaming to leave them alone. This is before I've even spoke to them. I'm a creep just by existing.

It's even making living my day to day life incredibly difficult. I feel so anxious even going into a shop or fast food restaurant because of the high probability that I'll have to interact with a woman and see her react in disgust to me. I hate these constant reminders of how unlikable I am.

I feel like a monster. I don't want to be me anymore.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • You aren't 0/10. You're like, average. Lose the chub, and work on hygiene, cuz it looks like you've got acne scars. Keep trimmed. Smile , get better fashion cuz you look... average. Like every guy.

    Confidence is your biggest problem. Go talk to girls irl. Don't do online dating, cuz that's purely visual and you need to practice looking good first. Approach women outside, at like a store or something. You'll have more success, cuz even if you aren't a super model, girls like confident guys and you give yourself the best shot that way.

    Good luck :)

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    • 2mo

      Did you not read the question? Women in real life hate me.

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    • 2mo

      What makes it my social skills

    • 2mo

      @TiffyPuff notice how the pic doesn't show his face. That's not him in the pic. He even said in our conversation that he has no issues when he uses other people's pics. You're right. Insecurities and social skills. He can't take constructive criticism. I wish I had never wasted my breath trying to help him. Some people would just rather self sabotage themselves.

Most Helpful Guy

  • work on yourself, start hitting the gym, list down your good qualities and be the best in trying to remove the negative ones
    then change your look
    try to laugh a little bit more, try hang around with people who value you
    and yeah, if you can't find a decent woman when you're gonna hit your 30s, do like me - pay for hookers. no dramas no regrets

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    • 2mo

      I already regularly go to the gym, if that was the solution I wouldn't have any issues. The reality is whether you have a nice body or not is all genetic, going to the gym makes no difference to women.

      I also have paid hookers in the past but that isn't a solution to being made to feel like shit by women in my day to day life. Its also very expensive if its your only source of physical intimacy.

    • 2mo

      all you say its true but hey, no wman will ever like you with this attitude. i know cos it didn't helped me at all! just focus on yourse. im 27 and i never had a meaningful relationship and tbh im tired of running after this desire to be loved. im just interested in doing my shit
      but if you want, try dating sites but beware cos lots of attention seeking psychos infest those places

What Girls Said 9

  • Dude. Quit being so hard on yourself. What's that saying.. Oh ya. We're our own worst critics. You probs don't look as bad as you think. As for online dating it can be a hit or a miss. Don't let it drag you down. Instead go out and do something you love. Whatever you want. And excel at it. It's gonna boost your confidence. And make ya happier.

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    • 2mo

      Apparently I look worse. I've just found out that I'm fat as well as ugly. Thanks to this place!

    • 2mo

      and you believe it? It's GAG dude. I stick to my words and say you aren't as bad.

  • I read somewhere that almost 90% of members on online dating sites are not even active. So for every 10 only 1 would see your profile. I would not vase anything goes on how many people respond to you.

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    • 2mo

      I sort by last login, so that is not the case.

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    • 2mo

      Doesn't mean they actually looked at you. Quite honestly I only look at about a third of the profiles I am "matched" with when I use online dating.

    • 2mo

      Why are you trying to pretend that nobody gets responses online when I know for a fact that good looking people do?

  • Judging by your comments on others responses you're quite a stubborn person @tiffypuff 's response was spot on, confidence is the key, as is dressing better, I don't know when in comparison your profile picture was taken to your body one below but it does look like you have moobs and you do have a double chin, do exercise to work on those, use good deodorant, shave, and dress like every day is a casual dinner.

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    • 2mo

      So you think I'm fat too?

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    • 2mo

      So do I need to stop going to the gym and eat way less?

    • 2mo

      I don't know how much you eat and I'm certainly not going to tell you to stop going to the gym. You do what you want my comments are simply my opinion on things you could work on based on the information I have.

  • It's not you. When I was single a few years ago on dating sites discover that a guys experience was much different than mine. I would get messages everyday where as guys never had women messaging them. I'm thinking it's a ratio difference (more men than women on the sites), women not being as aggressive in initiating conversation maybe. What I did know for a fact is they all complained that it wasn't easy to get dates. It also depends on your location and what you put in your profile. Maybe there's something you've put that is turning women away or you're putting to much to where she thinks she knows all she needs too to decide she's not interested. Maybe be a little more mysterious so she has to ask questions and learn something attractive about you she would not have otherwise realized if she just looked at your profile. These are oviously just guesses but couldn't hurt to try. You're not a 0. People don't define you anyway. You do.

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    • 2mo

      I have no trouble when I use someone else's picture. Its only pictures of me that get 0 responses.

      Women in real life despise and ignore me just as much as online.

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    • 2mo

      With your attitude your right.

    • 2mo

      Disgusting old whore.

  • I met someone on a dating site I have fallen for before meeting... it is not always down to looks so maybe you are giving off a vibe of low confidence?

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    • 2mo

      Being ugly and knowing it very well , you can't really feel confident about yourself anyway. Its easy for you to say. Imagine yourself a very very hairy skinny guy. Would you feel comfortable and confident?

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    • 2mo

      Something witty... Well its witty enough when its coming from someone good looking, just not when its coming from me.

    • 2mo

      It too tough for my type of men anyway. Being ugly on face as well as ugly bodied ( due to excessive hairs) it's not easy.
      As a pretty woman can you accept a ugly bodied (very hairy) man as a friend? I doubt you would find his body aesthetically and sexually pleasing anyway

  • If you're 0 at something, be a 10 at something else

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  • I'm sorry that you feel that way. I am most certain that there's somebody for everybody. You just have to be patient and wait for her to find you. In the meantime work on making yourself happy and everything else will fall in place.

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    • 2mo

      How can I be happy when women despise me?

    • 2mo

      How can you make a woman happy if you despise yourself. She is right. You have to be happy with you in order for women to see who you are. You're giving off negative vibes because you're insecure by letting people define you. Only you should define you. If someone doesn't think you're attractive then so what? Who the fuck are they? You know who you are and what you have to offer. And if you don't then you need to figure that out before any woman is gonna like you.

  • Oh god. Thats drastic..

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  • Maybe you shouldn't call girls pathetic attention seeking liars for a start.

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    • 2mo

      When a grown man says that type of thing to a girl under the age of 18, without any knowledge of who she is or where she comes from, with no background as to the kind of person she actually is, but nevertheless makes the effort to reach out and waste their breath on her, I think that's when THEY become the pathetic attention seeking liar. If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all.

    • 2mo

      I'm pretty sure anyone who received a comment as petty as yours would have something to say about it. I'm also pretty sure that the only kind of person who would leave a comment like that in the first place is that of an immature attention seeker wanting to deliberately start a fight because he literally has nothing better to do.

    • 2mo

      You're exhausting. Leave the little girls alone and pick on someone your own size. And get a life. I'm sure you're a fantastic person whom I caught at the wrong moment and I genuinely hope you find some love. Good luck 😂

What Guys Said 17

  • What you need is therapy. I felt like I had zero self confidence and self esteem. Then after my unwanted divorce, I started dating and had a lot of success. It sent it skyward. but it took a lot of therapy and willingness to "fake it til you make it" before it sets in. They have sliding scales at most therapist offices so income is not an issue, most people can afford it.

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    • 2mo

      Therapy is a con. A therapists job is to make you believe things that aren't true. It is only good at making money for therapists.

    • 2mo

      Have you had therapy? my guess is no. OR you had a really bad therapist. Or your in one of those fucked up cults er, I mean "religions" like Scientology.
      People go to school, and the best do a lot of follow up research to help people. The tools they give you can help you through a lot of things. If you have a good therapist, they will call you out on your bullshit when your sitting having a pitty party for yourself. I had negative feelings about therapy when I was a kid also. I know a lot better now.

    • 2mo

      Your guess is wrong.

  • you aren't a 0 out of 10 in looks department. so i imagine it may be something in how you approach women

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    • 2mo

      Yes I am.

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    • 2mo

      So women who ignore messages on online dating but reply when I use a picture of someone else are doing so because of my 'self esteem'? I highly doubt that.

    • 2mo

      whatever dude. you are horrible. is that what you want me to say? ok then there you go

  • I'd like to think there's someone for everyone. Regardless, I think what you need most is to stop trying so hard, maybe look at thing a different way and think of it like you have nothing to lose, be more spontanious and outgoing knowing that there probably not interested anyway and I think they will come to you. I've seen first hand how the ugliest guys got the prettiest girls and I'm not just saying that, basically, try to let loose and and think about it and things will get better

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  • You can always go be a circus freak. Really though, sit down and make a list of what you hate about yourself.

    Cross off what just cannot be changed without extreme measures.

    Then pick something and work on it.

    Currently for me it is my weight and general health one thing at a time. Next will be my teeth. Hell, and I'm 30. You are only 19. Start now and by the time you are 30 you may be impressed with who you are.

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  • Hey man, online 95% of us are 0/10s, even if we're 7/10s in the real world. Women online get extremely picky because the ones on dating sites are often the pickier ones to begin with and they get bombarded with dozens of messages per day. Just go meet women in the real world.

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    • 2mo

      Did you not read the question? Women in real life hate me.

    • 2mo

      All I can tell you is that it will always be less worse in real life. If you're a 0/10 online you could still be a 4/10 in the real world.

      Judging from your picture you could help yourself by getting rid of the neckbeard and losing weight so your cheekbones and jawline become visible.

  • Man I'm no expert with women by any means, I have my fair share of good luck and bad with women. Even the guys who you believe to be "gods gift to earth" do not bat 1000.

    One thing is for sure. You will never be able to attract any woman with the vibe that you're currently giving to them. Just reread the post you left on here, the way you're talking about yourself is the same as the vibe you're giving off to women, and what woman wants to be with someone who "feels like a monster", "a creep just by existing", "... how unlikable I am." I'm not trying to be an ass but the reactions you're having from women are nothing more than feedback for the person you're presenting to them.

    Look at these reactions not as an excuse to beat yourself up but to use to change yourself for the better. And if you're not willing to change yourself than no one can help you.

    Just start with a small experiment like dressing up more, it can even be as simple as smiling and saying hello to the next girl that walks by and that's it. Take baby steps and build your confidence back up. All of the thoughts you're having about yourself right now are thoughts that millions of other men in this world have had about themselves before too. They just decided to not let the negative thoughts keep them down and they keep at it. Don't ever beat yourself up for trying man.

    Hope this helps.

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  • On most of the online dating sites , the women are actually paid to be there. some of them are even married or already have boyfriends of their own. Women who are in need are very few. That's why nobody seems to be interested in you. At present you are having very low self esteem. Your confidence is low and you don't have a positive attitude. You will need to sharpen your dating skills., learn a few good opening lines , Learn how to approach girls with confidence. You should learn communication skills. Learn to present yourself as an attractive young male ready for love. Be creative and skillful. Enhance your emotional maturity. Girls out there have many suitors , they have got ample choices. You need to prove to them why you are better. Only then you will succeed. So don't love heart and prepare yourself well before jumping into the field. Best of luck to you.

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  • You should change yourself it's not thay much of looks it more like your mindset and are you funny or not

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  • 0/10? well I would say you are being too harsh on yourself.

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  • Maybe do something to change your perception of yourself.

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  • Cheer up man, some girl out there will find you attractive some day. Just need some patience and dating apps don't help anything by the way.

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  • Yo online dating is a disaster man. You gotta grow more confident and approach women in real life. It's a numbers game after all.

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  • You're actually pretty cute for a soccer ball. I'd hit it... with my right foot and into the goal

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  • If you truly believe that your unattractive

    ... what have you done to change it?

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    • 2mo

      I tried going to the gym but that changed absolutely nothing. In fact I've discovered today that going to the gym has made me look fat to women, so if anything its counter productive.

    • 2mo

      While I'm not sure what picture these women are talking about that make you look fat

      But if you can show me a facial pic I could always make some recommendations,

      Also attraction goes beyond physical appearance... work on looking the best you can. But try becoming that person that people want to be around.

  • Do yourself a favour.

    Create a female account on one of these sites.

    Then see if you can provide *one* response to every single mail you get in the first month.

    Women get hundreds and hundreds of messages on these things. Even with the best will in the world, they can't reply to everyone. It's a numbers game.

    What's bizarre is that your success rate on an online site, is even LESS than your success rate in a bar. But online sites get male users because there are still guys who are too timid and afraid to approach girls in person.

    They don't realise that, say, one in twenty girls will respond positively in a bar situation, but it's more like one in a hundred online.

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  • Dude I have the same problem on dating sites

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  • Got money, looks and status.

    Aesthetic body will make women wet and want to fuck you. Money will keep them around. Status/popularity will improve your chances of them thinking you have an "amazing" personality because if a lot of people like you then you must be a terrific person (women are conformist they follow the group).

    www.girlsaskguys.com/.../q2087403-would-you-date-this-38-yr-old-miscer

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    • 2mo

      Stupid answer literally half of the girls said they wouldn't date him. And he is a miscer they are all FA.

    • 2mo

      Having an aesthetic body is determined by your genetics. I cannot achieve that.

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