What drives you more, positive praises or negative downers?

a positive praise is more like : I know you can do it, if you put your mind to it you can do anything. Or That's a great idea, I really like how you think. I think that's going to make you really happy.

a negative downer is someone who says: You will never do it. Thats the worse idea ever. You're a loser. You will fail so bad.

So, which one do you like better? Which one makes you feel like it drives you to do better in life?
Honestly my husband's dad was a negative downer, and he is one too. It really drives him to do better in his life but I like positive praises more. How about you?

  • positive praises
    81% (17)67% (22)72% (39)Vote
  • negative downers
    19% (4)33% (11)28% (15)Vote
And you are? I'm a GirlI'm a Guy

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Neither. Constructive criticism and a need to provide for my family and help those I love drive me. Positive praises, while they can make me feel good about a job well done, are a waste of time to me. Complaints without any kind of advice or a solution are equally a waste of time. Constructive criticism from someone more experienced or simply better at the job than me, show me what I do that's not neccesarily wrong, but what I can do better and therefore optimise my proformance. Also, I'm mainly driven by my will to provide for my family and generally hopefully improve the lives of those I care about in any way I can so long as it doesn't negatively affect my ability to provide for my family.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • I think there needs to be a balance. If someone is calling me a loser, they have no business trying to drive me or anyone else toward success, but you can be like, get off your butt and do whatever needs to be done instead of doing the same crap you're doing. On the flip side, you're so good and perfect and wonderful and everything is working can leave you complacent. Like, well, all I hear is praise, so I must be doing everything right and perfect.

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    • 2mo

      Interesting!! I think I understand what you are saying

    • 2mo

      thanks for MHG

What Guys Said 18

  • positive because it makes me want to work hard to maintain that opinion people have

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  • positive, but the negative hits me harder. It takes more positives to get the same effect out of me.

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  • I am like your husband's family - Positive praise "Meh, whatever", negative "F*** you, I am going to show you" - You should hear the way I talk myself into doing better, it would make a drill sergeant blush.

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  • Incentives, so praises I guess. Which is ironic because I love demotivational posters and quotes...

    cdn.shopify.com/.../...ationdemotivator_large.jpeg

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  • i like positive more.
    but sometimes its very hard staying positive all the time

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  • Positive praise it always nice if somebody appreciate for good things

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  • Positives make me feel like what I'm doing is sufficient

    Negatives feel bad but they make me try harder

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  • Positive praise reaffirms that I am doing the right thing, and well.

    Negative, unconstructive comments make me resent the person they're coming from.

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  • Negative, because it makes me work harder.

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  • I prefer positive praises with constructive criticism. Purely negative comments lower my confidence.

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  • I "like" positive praises much better, but negative downers actually help me more.

    I'm pretty stubborn, so when someone tells me I can't do something, that just makes me wanna prove them wrong and shove it in their stuck up, arrogant face.

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  • I vote C: Both are driving factors.

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  • Both will be believable if said enough so positive comments are a better thing to say

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  • i dont like being praised.. its so uncomfortable.. so i guess being praised drives me more because it drives me to want to punch that person in the jaw so they can't praise me anymore

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  • I like people who are positive praises also i do like positive minded people.

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  • you're seriously losing it

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What Girls Said 6

  • Neither. I drive myself.

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    • 2mo

      which would you prefer though, if you had someone close to you would you prefer them to down you or give you positive reinforcement?

  • Positive reinforcement goes a long way with me.

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  • I do work well with the negative downers, but I prefer the positives :)

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  • Negatives. I don't really like praises, compliments, etc.

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  • Positive

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  • I'm going to do what I strive to do whether or not people are behind me. If they are being negative, that's when I realize I don't want them in my life. There are way too many of them and I feel they are toxic so fuck that.

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