Was I wrong for this?

My ex partner always wants to go house viewing or look at furniture he cannot afford.
When we were together he'd get my hopes up that he would save up for the things he wanted.
He's only dug himself into money troubles throughout our entire relationship and me 4,000 short due to saving him all of the time when he has been irresponsible with bills.
Fast forward to today , I went clothing shopping.
After I was done he said he wanted to check out a furniture store I replied "Oh God!" he then said, "I just looked at the stores you wanted to , why can't you look at the stores that I want? I replied , "You can't afford them!" He said "Wowwwww!". I told him the whole point of going into a store is to get something, not just look. It's the whole reason we broke up. I'm beyond disguised.
by the way I am 30 he is 39 we were together for more than a decade.


Most Helpful Guy

  • You're not wrong, but you're not right, either. He's a big boy now. You don't hold the purse strings; I'm sure some part of you still cares or you wouldn't have said what you did, and posted it here. But he's got to face the consequences of his actions. If he overspends, it's on him now. It's like being addicted to a drug. You can try to get them help, but they have to want to help themselves. It doesn't sound like he's at that point. It may take a few lawsuits and wage garnishments to get him there.


Most Helpful Girl

  • I think the way you reacted might not have been helpful, becuase the only thing that does is offend him and for him to think you were intentionally being cruel. Had you explained in a better manner, that probably would have meant more to him.

    However, I guess I can't say what is wrong and what wasn't becuase you were in the situation ( I wasn't) and it was your money he screwed up and wasn't big and responsible enough to pay you back (assuming he didn't).

    I think breaking up with him becuase of that was a good reason becuase he would have brought you down with him, or you would have been the main intelligent head of the relationship concerning money and knowing when and went not to spend. It would have made you worked hella hard becuase he wasn't responsible.


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What Guys Said 3

  • Why are you still acting like your in a relationship and shopping together. That concerns me the most.

    • He wants to be with me and we still live together. He gets jealous if I talk to other guys. Ask him that.

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    • Ahh I see. Well tell him to get out. Its your place.

    • Yeah but it's hard when my kid cried when I kicked him out for two weeks. He wanted his daddy home

  • Well I can go into a store and look around for an hour, not buying anything. But no, you made the right decision. That kind of spending is usually done by a woman (Don't hate) Did you have children together?

    • Usually people to specifically to furniture stores with the intentions of buying. We are not talking about a comic or game store.
      Yes we had a kid together.

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    • Yikes. Do you sleep in the same bed?

    • Yes, from the outside looking in it looks like we r still together. This is y it's hard to move on. I want to because I am hurt but when he was put out for two weeks our kid burst into tears crying that he missed his daddy. He kept asking when is he coming home. I feel trapped.

  • What would it hurt? Since he's an ex, you won't be bailing him out next time...


What Girls Said 0

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