Do you think it's wrong that I'm choosing to be single or do I need help?

The only reason I want to stay single is mostly because I'm afraid of rejection.

my grandparents and single aunt try to egg me on to go to clubs and meet new people.

even though I told them the people that are at the clubs is to dance and meet other women.

which is not a bad thing, but the reason why I would go to clubs is the fact that I'm afraid of being rejected, since back in highschool I was rejected by almost every young lady.

I got this idea that all women will just reject me.

now I will be honest with you I can make conversation with a ugly or decent women, but a hot or cute women I get socially awkward.

sorry for going off subject, but on
a serious note is it wrong that i want to stay single, since some of the hot or cute ones are gold diggers or prostitutes, and then you have the ones that date older men, and then you have the ones who go for a specific race, and then you have the snobs or stuck ups.

i mean It's like a game to find a women that have the same interest as you.

Is it wrong that I want to stay single for along time or do I need to find some help.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • That's a dumb reason to be single! We're all afraid but you shouldn't let emotions prevent you from what you want. Like if you want a college degree you have to go to college but if you're afraid of failing you'll never go to class or get your degree.

    I mean if you need to work on confidence or not caring about rejection do that before you go into dating. Just don't ever date because of fear ya know

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    • 1mo

      I've actually been single ever since I was born

      Never dated, kissed, or have sexed with a girl.

      Therefore I'm sick of playing the game trying to find a girl with the same interest as you.

      I've even went for average to ugly got to know them and when I said if they want to hang out

      They say no and rejected me.

      That's why I feel like maybe being single still is the only choice

    • 1mo

      I'm the same except once went on a date from online dating but he didn't even try anything :/

      I've tried the average thing too but it doesn't work!! Then it makes me feel worse like how can they not even want me?

      Honestly it is hard to find someone who likes you back and is single but it's not impossible.
      I don't want to give up so sometimes I go on hiatus but for now I try to focus on other things in life because I am not ready for a relationship. I don't have time really and I'm kinda emotionally immature

Most Helpful Guy

  • Women don't get it because they never face rejection like men do... it is proven men reject women with more ease and respect... when women act like cunts when rejecting a man...
    with this said, I advice you to meet women and treat then like anybody else... maybe those women are evil but so are some of those men you speak with! meet girls and have sex with them.. go out and have some fun... just never commit to a woman if you are afraid of being used...

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    • 1mo

      One time this cute blonde cheerleader played a game with me saying to everyone at highschool that I was her crush and then they made it a 2 year thing and I found out they were actually talking shit about me since one of the cheerleaders who was my best friend came up to me and said "they did this just to make themselves look popular" by making you seem like her stalker. I would write that cute girl love songs and poems and even tried looking good for her

      Bought her even something for Valentine's Day.

      Most Women are cunts

      some women are nice

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    • 1mo

      A lot of people change because they had a situation where they had to see themselves in the mirror or becuz someone else was a cunt to them!! unfortunately some girls fake being nice when they are older just to get men committed to them and to look more mature in work... but deep inside they are the same I pity them...

    • 1mo

      to be honest it's sad but true

What Girls Said 7

  • no, being single is a personal choice. in fact, I think it raises your value when your not just jumping from one relationship to the next

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  • So you can talk to and, I assume, be with ugly or average girls, but those have been ruled out as an option. So what you are left with is either rude and bratty girls who are beautiful, or being single. I'd say be single.

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    • 1mo

      i hate it when a girl my age say "why don't you go for the ugly ones then"

      Then I told them "why didn't you go for the ugly ones"

      Then they say touché.

    • 1mo

      All I know is that I would rather be single than be with someone who is as obnoxious as the girls you described who wouldn't even give you the time of day. Don't care how good you look if that's the attitude you have.

  • It is not wrong, It is sad that you do not try at least. I get it, it must be hard to be rejected but what if she wasn't going to reject you?

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    • 1mo

      Well it happens a lot even in college

      One time I tried making a conversation with this one girl in college, and I said "so what are you into" , and she gave me the silent treatment, and then I said "so what book you reading it seems quite interesting" then outloud she said fuck off

      I just told her have a nice day.

  • YOU are only 20 fucking years old, why are you forcing yourself to find a soulmate?

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  • So average girls can go fuck themselves?

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  • no. nobody cares. do what you want

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  • no it's not wrong to wanna keep being single

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What Guys Said 16

  • Well, you really have two different subjects here.
    First, you need to be able to improve your communication skills so that you can start to see results when you do talk to women that your interested in. Even if you want to stay single, it still feels good to have a great conversation with someone that your attracted to. Start with people that you aren't as attracted to and work your way up - that way you'll know that you are good at speaking to people in general - which will also translate to great conversations with beautiful women. If you are looking for some good information on how to do this, I recommend books by Patrick King - they are easy to read in a couple of hours and provide true insight. The bottom line is: Fear should never have a voice in deciding what you want to do - merely because its a representation of what you believe you can do - or can't do actually. If you improve your skills and believe that you can be successful, then you won't feel fear (thus, some of your current choices wouldn't even be an option to choose from). Fear of failure and fear of rejection is something that most people struggle with and relate to - so just realize that you're not alone in how you feel.
    Second, there is nothing wrong with being single. If you choose to be single, do it for reasons that empower you and make you stronger. Otherwise, neither choose to be single or looking for a partner. Just live your life and be happy and when you find someone awesome, include them too.

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  • I believe that in choosing to be single, you are going down a riskier path than taking a chance on being rejected. In trying to get with someone, the odds are you will be rejected. However, there's a chance you won't. On the other hand, in *not* trying to get with someone, you have assured yourself a rather lonely life.

    Rejection is the norm, my friend. However, take it from one who has got with the best woman on the planet. The rejection is worth it when you find the right person.

    P. S. I believe acting on fear isn't really a choice. Acting IN SPITE OF fear, now THAT'S a choice.

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  • It's not wrong man, I feel you!
    Just don't think about a relationship right now focus on life, what you enjoy, have fun treat women you find attractive like any other person and you'll find someone along the way ^^

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  • Not "wrong" for this. I'm sensing a deeper past story to this one. Anyhow, it sounds like you're afraid of messing up with the cute / hot ones and have generalizations toward them.

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  • You're not missing much. I've been single for ages but there was a time that I used to go on the chase, to bars, clubs. I'd hit on all sorts of women and with good responses too.

    However, I quickly came to the conclusion that it was a freaking waste of time so I no longer bother. Instead, I spend my time working out, learning, earning and relaxing.

    All you are missing out on is mind games, stds, silly emotional outbursts and very very boring phone conversations that make you want to jump out of your own bedroom window.

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  • Fear of rejection will ruin your ENTIRE life! Fear of rejection will make you talk yourself out of opportunities and experiences in life (not just dating).

    You gotta nip this in the bud!

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  • You are 20, so I'd say it's fine to be single. Get yourself together, like finish school or do well in your career. Enjoy your life. Not all women are sluts and/or gold diggers. Just need to find a decent one in due time.

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  • Your life your choice but the only way your ever going to get over that fear is to face it.

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  • Women are shallow. All they care about is looks, money, and fame/popularity. It's hilarious how they'll disagree with this fact, yet continue to be this way instinctively in real life lol.

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    • 1mo

      You know what you're telling the truth

      Because women my age always tweets photos about sexy models, sexy celebrities, and even wanting to go to hookup with older man sites.

      It's the truth but you know what maybe it's good that I'm single

      It could be worse

      I could be a dude who always take their girls too concerts that they don't enjoy like ACL festivals or Drake rather than Metallica or Pantera.

  • I am also single by choice. Just not my choice. But there is nothing I can do about it, so Im now just trying to find a way to learn to live with it

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  • Up to you

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  • I'm more afraid of her saying yes than I'm afraid of her saying no

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  • If you feel you need help then you probably do

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  • there's absolutely nothing wrong with it at all

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  • Have you ever gone out with a guy?

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  • love is a battlefield. so break the UN treaties and bring out the WMD's... AKA online dating. try it.

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    • 1mo

      I have to pay 29.99 for match

      I tried online dating

      It never worked since I was catfish, and I was scam on some.

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