How do I accept that there is always someone better than me?

How do I accept that there is always someone better than me?
That's a picture showing the merit system of academic excellence in the Philippines. Just seeing that chart makes me feel bad about myself.

As for me, I fall under the third (and the lowest of all) classification because my academic average is only 92.

I have this friend who falls under the second classification because her average is 97 (add one more point and she'll receive a gold medal). Last year, I completed 10th Grade with 93 as my average and she had 89 as hers. Now, seeing her performing better than me makes me question my former accomplishment. My mom even got angry at me because she said my friend's improvement is a sign that I'm too arrogant enough to underestimate her (which I did not even do; that's just her opinion and is not true at all).

I guess I better accept the truth that she's excelling even if I did my best. The question is, how? 😞


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Most Helpful Guy

  • The same thing is with me. I always feel very inferior if someone is better than I, even if by a small margin. Even though I'm two years ahead of my class in all subjects, my friend is a step ahead, with higher grades than mine.
    I guess the way that I deal with it is just to realize that I'm still better than a lot of people in my school, and my grades are still good, if not the best. A lot of people would love to have my grades, but they don't put in the effort that I do. A 93% is better than that of a 60%, right?

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Most Helpful Girl

  • You need to try to keep things in perspective. You are a great student, a high achiever and if you keep up this pace, you'll probably be able to get into any school you want.

    Ask yourself these questions and hopefully the answers will give you a better perspective..
    Is winning and the grade the most important thing or what you learned along the way and how you got there?
    Does one or two points really make them smarter than you?
    Did you leave anything on the table or the term I like to use is did you give a 'max effort' all the time?
    When you didn't do as well as expected, did you go back and figure out what you could have done differently? We tend learn more from when we make a mistake than when we get it all right.

    Ultimately it's the processes and habits you develop in High School that will determine how successful you'll be in life, not that your average was a couple of points lower than someone elses.

    p. s. If you want to get to more of the How to be a High Achiever, you should listen to the book on CD (don't think it ever came out in print) called the Maverick Mindset by Dr John Eliot. He's engaging and anything but boring. You should be able to check it out from your library or through interlibrary loan. It's 8 CD's, so you can always make an mp4 audio book out of it and listen to it on your phone. Good luck on your journey and if you have any questions, feel free to IM me.

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What Guys Said 13

  • the only way to handle it is too accept that there is someone better than you and also think off it this way:

    you have great marks and you could go far with those marks because you can get a very good job in the future that pays a lot.

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  • You'll never be perfect. But you'll be perfect for someone.

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  • That's just life. There's always someone better

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  • Confidence. I could fail everything and still know I'm more intelligent then they are.

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  • You dont accept it. There is no one better or more important than you. Sure your kids later might be more important to you than yourself, but right now you are the most important person in your life. You dont have to accept anything you dont want to. You want to be the best, be it. Its your life, do what you want. And most importantly: never do anything you dont want to do.

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  • grades don't matter trust me

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  • You'll always feel inferior. You're wired that way... You're a performance based learner, you constantly need to be patted on the back and told good job. It's deeply rooted in your personality.

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  • With time? Look at this another way; the grades are only relevant to get into university. By that time something terrible could happen to either of you to make your grade difference really unimportant.

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  • Ignore it. Its just words. Just because she answered a bunch of questions based on what you've been taught better doesn't mean she's smarter. Everyone excels in their own way. In my class Im the best student on paper but I'm also disorganized and somewhat lazy when doing assignments and reading for tests. There are people better than me. It just doesn't show on paper.

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  • just accept it. it is the way it is.

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  • Considering the general state of the Philipines they must be bigger posers then the f**king British.

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  • deal with it.

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  • Lower your ego

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What Girls Said 7

  • You just do. There are people and friends of mine who is academically better than I am. I can only admire them and try harder. That's all. You don't have to give up. Your mother shouldn't get angry. Your trying. And your a lot better than most people who don't even try at all. She should be proud, not bagger, judge or criticize you.

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  • Stop comparing against other people. If you want to be better, compete against yourself and set small achievable goals

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  • There's 7 billion people in the world chicka. Ofc there's always gonna be someone who's EXTREMELY TALENTED in a field that you're not. It's the way life is! Is someone BETTER than anyone? No. We're all humans. No one is better. Talented in something absolutely! You did amazing! Don't be so hard on yourself. :) hold your head high and just try try try. You'll get the results!

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  • The more you worry about it, the more unhappy you will feel. Once you let it go then things become better.

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  • No worries. Everyone has insecurities about one thing or another. Not everyone can be perfect, but I believe there's always room for improvement. You have the potential, so as long as you work hard and continue to do your best, that's all that should really matter. Don't be so hard on yourself.

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  • As someone else said, stop comparing yourself to others and just focus on you.

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  • Be yourself

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