Should I join the military with a pregnant girlfriend?

[jagd-up-]

My girlfriend and I dated for a year before taking a year-long break and then getting back together for the past 6 months. I just graduated from college, but I am having trouble finding a job with the way the economy is going so I started looking into the military and its benefits. I have gone through two months of job searching and because of that my heart has kind of set itself on the military. However, my girlfriend does not like the idea and I would probably have broken up with her to make it fair for the both of us if I did join since I would be gone so long (4+ years on and off). Now I found out that she is pregnant. I still want to join if my financial situation does not improve, but I also want to be there for her and the child. I don't want to put my life first, but I also don't want to completely give up on my dreams. I just wanted to get some outside input from others. Thanks

[bellena]

Joining the military will always be frowned upon by women who understand relationships. If you join the military, you won't be able to be their for her or the baby. You will be commited to your job, not your family. It inevitable that you cheat on her(please, Most of my family has been in the military I know). And sometimes the women cheat too.

The military has you sign up for 8 years no matter how long your active duty is. For the 2, 4, 6 years that you sign up for you won't be able to spend much time with your family at all. Then after that you are on callback, meaning wars and disasters you'll be called on.

If you want my advice, go with the nation guard. They have similar benefits if not the same plus you'll be home, and only on call when something happens such as hurricanes or if something like 9/11 happens. If you really want to protect your country and the people in it, then BE there and not off in some other country doing what you are told for any number of reasons.

Bottomline: Look into the National Guard. Decide what will be best for you and your famly. Decide what you are willing to sacrifice.

[A-Soldiers-Wife07]

Most military men cheat huh? Give me a break. YOUR family was in the military, not you. Its no more than civilians. Just more frowned upon because they put their lives on the line. I see everyday what goes on being a soldier's wife. Cheating is NOT inevitable.

[A-Soldiers-Wife07]

If your unsure you want to do this, don't. My husband is a soldier, and I see too many soldiers where this isn't what they really want and because of that they don't put their whole heart into their job and end up putting their fellow soldier's lives on the line. Sure the benefits for your child will be great, as the child will get medical insurance. If you need ANY help at all, please feel free to message me. If you would like, I can also talk to her. Being on her side of things, sometimes it's easier for the girlfriends/wives to hear things from another wives point of view. The military is a very honorable thing to do, but its one of the hardest lifestyles you will ever choose for yourself and your family.

[Standingpretty]

Boy that's a thoughie, I would say stay for a year to help her with the baby, doing kind of sh*tty jobs then join. That way, you can help her through the hardest part of raising the baby and you will get to spend some time with your child and then you you can help improve your money situation. I would also talk to her about this, and maybe suggest that it would be good because then you would be able to provide for her and the baby. Try to stick it out for awhile then if you need to and your girlfriend is ok with it then go. Things could improve though, so don't give up just yet.

[heatherjo]

If my boyfriend wanted to join the military, I would want to support his choice the best that I could. But on the other hand there is no way I would want to raise a child without him, and I know that he would want to be a part of his child's life. So, my question to you would be A) do you guys care about each other? (I know you were broke up for a long time.) and B) Is it your child? I think that the answers to those questions would make a difference in the situation. If you don't really care for her, but it is your child. Then I would say do your thing and send her support and don't forget to visit your child on your breaks!. If you care and it is your child, then stay with her, raise your child, and be a family. If its not your child, then do what is important to you, you have no obligations to her.

[CountryGirl89]

i think you should join. it's an admirable job, and personally if my boyfriend wanted to join the army I'd encourage him to. sure I'd be scared and everything, but I'd be proud of him, so she may just be scared, but I say you do what you want. it's up to you. just make sure you're sure of your decision

[Anonymous]

its all up to you obviously but I would want my boyfriend to go away.specially if I was prego.talk to her about it and just think about it.children are a beautiful gift, you wouldn't wanna miss out.