you shouldn't do anything you aren't comfortable with. first it starts with holding each other close and kissing, passionately with tongue. making out is the first step on the path to sex.
most guys try to get into your bra and feel your boobs and/or your panties and start fingering you hoping these avenues will lead to more.
it is up to you to put on the brakes especially if you want a relationship. because if he is attracted to you, the kissing is getting hot, and then you let him go under your clothes, especially your panties, he will want sex even more and think you are okay with it. this will happen whether he wants a relationship or not, and if he is unsure about his intent with you, well going too fast too soon may not help you, as annoying as it seems.
he may also try to move your hands to his crotch/put them in his underwear. but even before that I would think he would try to feel your goods, especially your vag, fingering you, because if the kissing is hot, him fingering you will really get you turned on...trust me from experience/ and the further you go the more he will want sex and if you put on the brakes when you're already under each others' undies it will make him a lot more frustrated than if you hadn't let him get there in the first place.
my first time making out with a guy, if I do not trust him/know his intentions yet, I don't let him go under my clothes because making out usually happens pretty fast if you like each other, and I am ready to make out way before I am ready to have sex so you have to let the guy know that up front. if he respects you he won't bitch about it especially if you are nice about it.
this is what happened with the last guy I dated:
our first date we barely knew each other at all so we didn't kiss yet. the second we kissed on the lips and he started lightly making out with me..open mouth and pulling me close but no tongue or groping yet. then the next date we made out in the car, I was sitting on his lap, lots of tongue. he started reaching under my shirt and skirt at once. it felt good but I knew I wasn't ready to take the step yet because I didn't want him to finger me already.
so I moved his hands and said I'm not ready yet. He stopped for a second and was cool about it and said he does not want to make me uncomfortable. Then he started kissing me more and kept his hands over my clothes. I let him keep his hands over my clothed boobs and butt but not go under the clothing at all and he was cool with that.
Next time we made out he asked before going under my clothes again, and the first time he fingered me he asked if I was okay with it as he was going under my skirt, before trying to touch my panties, so he could stop if I said no.
A good guy will understand. If you object to him going under the clothes (considering it is the first time you all made out) and he gets annoyed he is certainly a jerk and probably only wants one thing.
It is smart to go in steps like this to see his intent
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The first thing any living thing has done since existence is make out in their own way :)
No books were written or read on it then.
Making out is something that is as natural as breathing or eating. Did anyone teach you how to do that? Except for table manners ofcourse.
Your very being tense about it is something that may spoil it for both of you. Don't have any hangups or preset notions about it. Let it flow naturally and feel the pleasure in everything done (unless too extreme or external - then you take a call and you will know when).
Why don't you just enjoy the most plesurable thing made by nature for all living creatures rather than worrying about it.
You are not out there to do a stage performance. Let it flow with ease and have a good time.
Good luck
When making out things could get frisky. What I usually do is I'll start running my hands over her and tell her that if she feels uncomfortable with where my hands are going..just slap it. It's usually comforting then. You could do the same thing with him.
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He should keep his hands around your waste or just above it. Or he could put his hands on your face like just below your jawline.
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