Why is my ex boyfriend sending me mean texts that accuse me of things I never did?

My boyfriend and I broke up a week ago. He constantly had a is of reasons as to why we could not hang out on weekends along with a myriad of other lame reasons as to why we should not be together anymore. For a few weeks before the break up I tried desperately to show/tell him how much I love him and miss him when he is not around. It seemed to only make things worse. He stopped being affectionate with me and would get mad at me when I didn't just walk up to him and hug him. It was exhausting just trying to figure out what to do around him to make him happy.

So after I received a text excuse from him that canceled our plans for last Friday night, I was done. It made me feel so insignificant to him that I was done. So...I stopped all communications with him. I was beginning to start feeling better after a week had gone by with no communication. To be honest I was a bit hurt that he didn't try to apologize for brushing me off and not making an effort to see me over the weekend ( I work out of town Monday-Friday and can only see him on the weekends.)

Then out of no where on Sunday afternoon I get a horrible text from him. My heart dropped into my stomach as I saw that it was him who text me. The text basically said that he was "disappointed in me" for disappearing. Then he proceeded to accuse me of talking to one of my best friend's ex-boyfriends (also an old coworker of his). This completely threw me because I haven't talked to him at all. The guy "liked" on of my Facebook posts but I hardly think that is "talking" to someone. He then ended the text with "goodbye and best of luck to you".

I guess I would just like to know why my ex is texting me mean texts and is accusing me of something so insane (I never liked this guy, ever). I did not respond to his text because I feared that it would turn into an argument and make me feel even worse. It has been very hard to let this one slide because no one likes to be accused of something they never did. Is he trying to "push my buttons"? Is he trying to get a rise out of me? What does he want?

 

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Most Helpful Opinion

  • Some people need to justify their stupid behavior, and lying is just fine if that works as a justification for dumping you. He knows what he said is nonsense, so don't waste time arguing with him. Don't respond at all!

    • Good plan! Best answer, no?

    • Thank you! I guess I just hurt his ego and he has to react with anger and lies. It feels like he is trying to "smoke me out of my whole" and get me to respond. I think I will find something else to do with my time :)

What Guys Said 2

  • It might be exactly what he didn't want. Maybe he got accustomed to you trying to please him and it gave him some sort of satisfaction to know he was in almost absolute control. The moment you were done with him, it knocked him off that comfy situation and right back on his arse to the ground. Hell if he is really bad, he might have seen you as some sort of slave to him and as you "rose up to oppose your master" so to speak, you need to be punished and that results in him being mean. He probably knows however that he will not gain that position again so he is taking what little sadistic fun he can by trying to torment you or he might think that trying to put you down will make you submit to his whims again. Either way, the best way to act is by ignoring him and going about your life like normal. At least in my opinion.

  • You dumped him, and it looked like he wanted to be the one who dumped you. So he lashed out.

    • I can't seem to find any other explanation to this :)

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