Why are guys so insecure?

one of my friends said that she reconnected with a guy after a couple years. They liked each other and they even kissed but that's it. They have been texting each other and have made plans to get together but plans have fallen through. He told her he was sick and wasn't feeling well and she offered to bring him soup and meds. he told her no because it was getting late but told her thanks for the offer. then he tells her out of nowhere, why is she being like this to him all of a sudden, meaning why is she so interested and where did it come from? we are both confused. why would a guy say that? did they not have a lot of attention from previous girls? is he insecure?


Most Helpful Guy

  • I think he just wants to know why she is doing all this for him so he can get a feel on how she feels about him because she must really like him to offer to bring him soup and meds... that's what ide do anyway ask her why so I could know how she feels see if maybe there's anther chance for us.

    • i think there can be another way of asking that question than just blirting it out, it makes it seem awkward. If this happened to me, I would take it as he is questioning my character and my feelings for him.

    • Thats why he dident directly say it and kind of hinted.

What Guys Said 4

  • are you sure he's being insecure? it's kinda hard to know without hearing his tone, he could be just teasing your friend.. if he does ask this seriously it also doesn't necessarily mean he's insecure, guys are much more direct and to-the-point. He's also probably not so good with words or is just not used to talking to girls so whatever he said he put it bluntly.

    • it was all through a text so maybe he just grabbed the balls to just come out and ask.

  • He's probably not used to her being nice.

  • It depends on his history I guess. I'm not used to being treated so well by women so would get a bit confused and wonder why a woman would do that for me. I'd feel quite guilty about her wasting her time or me being an inconvenience as well in all likelyhood.


What Girls Said 2

  • Is it possible she threw him for a loop unintentionally years ago and he spent a lot of time getting past it...and he feels toyed with? Is it possible he feels it's a bit early to be treating things so seriously?

    If it were me, I'd explain myself and leave him be. He'll come around.

    In response to the question about guys being insecure, the ones in particular that are, have suffered at the hands of being hurt badly and are truly confused about what to expect in a relationship. They spend a long time learning to put their guard up and not worry about caring, they're very protective of who they let in, and it'd serve a girl right not to toy with that guard unless she intends to uphold the place she wants to capture.

    To many girls, just like too many guys, are too fickle with their interests. They make promises they can't keep, and then toss them when they no longer fulfill her void. Because of that, smart men know to give a waiting period before accepting niceness as truth.

    And then some of us, like myself, just treat niceness as friendliness so we don't have to think about things without direct clarification otherwise.

    I don't complicate it so I don't confuse mySELF and spend my days in what ifs or making more out of things I don't know to exist and don't care to entertain if I don't think they do.

    There are many reasons it could be. Some people just prefer things with clarity.

  • Alot of guys underestimate how attractive they are looks wise