Do you feel you deserve more than you are worth?

Like when you are looking for a partner do you wish/ hope for a great catch or do you feel that you deserve high quality partners only. Many people are single because they refuse to date people of similar level and are holding out for something better? what do you'll think?

Poll is for the main question

  • Yes
    33% (7)47% (7)39% (14)Vote
  • No
    67% (14)53% (8)61% (22)Vote
And you are? I'm a GirlI'm a Guy
Updates:
Also do you use the same criteria to evaluate yourself for others or are you more lenient/stricter to yourself or potential partners
"Quality" can be any trait(s) or characteristic(s) that you find attractive in a potential partner. It also goes without saying, but Why do you feel you deserve more than you are worth?


Thanks for the answers so far :)

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36|17

Most Helpful Girl

  • Guys seem to think so! They whine that they're single but they're only going for girls who are WAY out of their league. I don't mean people are better than others, it's that they're going after girls who put a lot of effort in to things where as they do not AT ALL!

    In order for a relationship to work you need to be equals.

    Me for example: I'm working towards a PhD in Chem&Biochem, I am the most ambitious person you will meet, I take pride in my appearance and put effort in to it, I don't smoke/do drugs, don't party.

    I want a guy who does the same. Why should I better myself when my partner will be a reflection of me?

    All these guys with no jobs, don't go to school, have no ambition or desire to do anything other than get free welfare/disability, don't put effort in to their appearance, smoke, drink, party, excessively swear among other things keep asking me out and calling me a bitch because I say no.

    YOU NEED TO DATE YOUR EQUAL!

    1|2
    • This if often true for women seeking man, but not men seeking women. Women are able to get away with being less ambitious and less educated as long she's fun to be around or attractive.

What Girls Said 36

  • Do you feel you deserve more than you are worth?

    I don't do 'deserve' as I don't think that concept applies to anything except the treatment of children/animals. I want what I want.

    Many people are single because they refuse to date people of similar level and are holding out for something better? what do you'll think?

    I think it understandable as likely most people would be unhappy and in an unhealthy relationship if they settled for what they didn't what.

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  • I'm a good woman, I want a good man.

    Someone who wants to be with me, someone I can have some fun with, a few laughs. Someone I can have good sex with. I want someone who appreciates me and everything I can bring to the table. I'm pretty easy going, and I'm looking for someone who doesn't get too up tight about everything. He doesn't have to be rich, brilliant, well endowed, or beautiful. He just has to love me. And yes I think I'm worth that much, and if he doesn't...Well he's not the man for me then.

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  • I would prefer someone equal to myself, I like to feel like I am on the same page and an equal to others not less than them and I don't think myself as better than others (expect those are really nasty to others, for sure I'm better than that). I do use this in friendship and dating although dating isn't going well for me right now, I am always getting guys who want to settle and have a serious relationship but I do not want anything that serious right now, if I was to be with someone id want him to be on the same page as me and to have things in common with me, many guys pretend they don't want nothing serious too even when I tell them I don't want it and they end up scaring me off, I'm just not in any shape to be all super into it like that, having a boyfriend would be great but I don't want to be super super committed like that, I just want a boyfriend who can create fun memories with me but not be pushy for seriousness but I feel like now that I am getting to 23 in 5 months it's hard but finding friends who will even stay around is also as I'm quite more mature than people near my age but not quite ready for serious stuff, so I guess it's pretty confusing, as long as things are equal I think everything will be good.

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  • I don't expect perfection, but I do expect a quality guy, that is attractive to me, employed, and good inner qualities. But I don't have some crazy list that he needs to fulfill. That would be unrealistic.

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  • I think I have a lot of issues/a past and am far far far from perfect, so imagining a perfect man is impossible for me, because to me, I am too far out there or f***ed up to deserve them really, or for them to even be into me/understand me.

    My ideal mate has probably been through some sh*t too, and can understand me and relate to me.

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What Guys Said 17

  • This implies that usually people aren't 'worth' much! Rather a pessimistic view of reality, and who are we to say what anyone is 'worth?'

    I doubt many people try to calcualte what they or anyone else is 'worth' when they are attracted to someone!

    but a lot of people evaluate others on some scale that they think tells them what that other person is 'worth.' Often these people are single, often for the long term!

    0|1
  • I think it is a bit of an oxymoron. It literally only reads right if we say that people deserve what they are worth, anything else just doesn't make sense in English but I think I know where you are headed.

    I just look for someone who is a good match for me (someone who I get along with and am attracted to, who is a good person). I could care less what they (or I) am worth.

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  • 1. I term that an adolescent thought :) (no patronization of insult intended to anyone who thinks that way - this is my philosophy)

    2. I don't quantify humans especially my potential partner on 'quality' / 'standards' term in body shape or looks or color

    3. Yes I do look for compatibility and the best way is that

    4. But I don't look for perfection, nor am I - if things were perfect then we probably would exist mundanely

    5. In a woman the one thing that I expect is being feminine / ladylike (the general meaning - pls don't spark a debate anyone by asking to describe it lol) - limit your expectations to the basics else even after finding the 'perfect partner' at a later date you'll start calling them a douche/slut etc. Killer is the expectation. The moment we start asking ourselves the question you've asked the problem begins :D

    6. Deserving whatever, what matters is who succeeds and this philosophy is for materialisitc things / situations that we must do to survive - does not apply to the potential partner

    7. I never have gone hunting for one, I take it as it comes (and it comes in droves)

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  • Hello .

    I said no , because I think that what we deserve and what we are worthy of its not a certain thing that we all can name , what we think we deserve may differ from what other people think that we deserve and in the end we may just get the least amount of what we thought that we deserved , but even so we may find ourselves feeling better with what we thought that was less than what we deserved so its just an other illusion that we make to justify some parts of our self's and some of our decisions .

    I wrote it in general , because I think that this is not a relationship thing only .

    About "criteria" and "Quality" I don't really have any , I just try to be open minded and not put every person though some test to evaluate them and I always remind myself that people have a lot in them and just some trails can't tell much , so I let them show me if they are going to be one of the people that I want to keep close or if they are not .

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  • Neither "yes" or "no". I feel like I am at the top and I deserve the best, haha. And that's not being cocky. I'm not saying I'm the most attractive guy out there, and I'm not saying "the best" is the hottest Victoria's Secret models out there. The best is really just the people I get along with best, and that's who I deserve. I'm a pretty awesome guy I think, so I don't see why I shouldn't be able to get an awesome girl :P

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    • I'd say I'm stricter to others. I already basically know everything about myself, and save for a few parts of me, I do like myself. With others, I often find myself seeing certain parts of them I don't really like that much. That doesn't mean I judge them as worse people than me, but it does affect a bit how I view them. I do look at the whole picture though, so if a girl is annoying sometimes, I do try to look at how she is most of the time.

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