Is it normal my girlfriend to hit me?

Question

Hey! My girlfriend hits me really hard. I'm Brazilian, she is an American black girl and she hits really hard for her her size lol I know.
You shouldn't hit women. Yet, my girlfriend is hitting me and this gets annoying. Every time I attempt to hit her back she gets all scared and says "sorry sorry please don't I'm sorry baby don't hit me"

She knows I'll never hit her back. I've been with her for 2 years. I don't wanna break up, I love her so much and she's a great girl.

Should I just hit her back just one time so she will be too scared to hit me again? How can I put fear in her so she won't hit me again?

hannah · Accepted Answer

Is It Normal For My Girlfriend To Hit Me?

No, no matter the gender, hitting a partner is not normal. Physical abuse in a relationship is a severe problem that should not be overlooked or accepted.
According to researchers, men and women are both impacted by intimate partner violence. Around one in three women globally have at some point in their life experiences physical and/or sexual abuse from an intimate relationship or sexual violence from a non-partner, according to the World Health Organization. Males can also experience partner violence but because of societal ideals of masculinity, they do not disclose it...

Violence in relationships can occur for a variety of reasons, such as abuse, past traumatic behaviors or mental health problems. However, they do not excuse or justify any violent behavior. Seeking support from a therapist or from a trusted friend or family member is crucial if you are dealing with physical abuse in your relationship. Keep in mind that in partnerships, everyone deserves to be treated with respect and dignity. Violence is never normal and acceptable...

Reasons Women Hit Men

It's important to remember that any kind of physical violence is never acceptable, regardless of gender. Yet, research has found that women are more prone to strike men in self-defense or in response to perceived threats. This could be as a result of past trauma, apprehension about reprisal, or a feeling of interpersonal impotence.

Women who use physical violence may also be motivated by cultural expectations and gender stereotypes. Physical aggressiveness is one method that women who find it difficult to communicate verbally might make their feelings in a relationship known.

The important thing is to get professional assistance to address any underlying issues and learn constructive methods for speaking with one another and resolving conflicts in partnerships.

What To Do When Your Girlfriend Hits You

If your girlfriend hits you, it's important to put your safety first and ask a reliable friend or senior member for assistance. Any physical force in a relationship should never be acceptable!

According to studies, domestic violence can have a negative and persistent impact on both physical and mental health, increasing the risk of despair, anxiety, substance abuse, and chronic pain.

It's also important to keep in mind that asking for help or calling it quits on a relationship does not make you a weak person or less of a guy. To put your health first and take action to ensure a safe and secure future is one of the most important things in life.

Should You Stay With A Girlfriend Who Hits You?

No, staying in a relationship with a partner who hits you is not safe nor healthy. Besides, the cycle of violence may continue in an abusive relationship, which could also harm your or your girlfriend's any future relationships.

Here, it is important to understand that you deserve respect and kindness, and that asking for assistance is a brave move toward a safer and healthier future for both of you...

How Do You Get Your Girlfriend To Stop Hitting You?

To address any underlying issues that might be causing the abusive behaviors of your partner, you should encourage your girlfriend for professional help such as a psychological therapy.

It's important to keep in mind that you are not required to change your girlfriend's conduct or put up with abuse. Then it could be better to quit the relationship and seek support from your friends or professional resources to handle any trauma brought on by the abuse of your girlfriend. Remember that it is really important to be in a relationship that you feel good in and that you feel safe...

Prettygurl12 · Accepted Answer

Honestly, I think you should clock her. And then break up.

My boyfriend and I have an agreement: If one of us hits the other, they have non verbally agreed to a counter attack by the other. Of course, we don't hit each other, but as we're both particularly physically aggressive people, we thought it a good idea to set that up. Just in case.

You need to sit her down calmly and tell her, "Look, I know you think that you can't hurt me because you're a small girl and I'm bigger than you, but it does hurt when you hit me, and if you do it again I'm gonna hit you back. You have been warned."

If that doesn't fix it...then your girl is not very smart and should be dumped.

xninjakittix · Accepted Answer

-_______- I think you guys are being a little too harsh. "dump her" is not the answer! stop trying to ruin a relationship if he's in love. anyways I'm sure she's not serious and she doesn't mean to hurt you. I think you should just tell her how you feel sternly about it. don't laugh or make it light make sure she understands its annoying and bothers you alot. I think you'll be fine! I used to be the same way, I was never serious when I hit my boyfriend at the time it just kind if happened. I didn't even know I was hitting him that hard! he told me about it and I understood and stopped. communication is the key love:) and don't break up with her if you love her please.

acka72 · Accepted Answer

Honestly I don't understand, why you are not dumping her.  That kind of disrespect is not love.  Men shouldn't hit women but women shouldn't hit men either and in my opinion, its a two way thing.  If you do hit her you bring yourself down to her level.  One thing is to hit and spank each other in a jokingly sexual manner though but if you guys are having a fight and she starts hitting you, if I were a dude, I would grab her arms squeeze them to the point of almost hurting her, making her lie down on the floor while I keep her there, as a reminder that I don't hit but I'm the physically stronger one in the relationship and should be treated with respect.

blackwaterhattie · Accepted Answer

Ask her what the hell her problem is. What is she, three? She should use her words, she shouldn't hit people. Was she raised by wolves? Also, if you look her in her eye-holes and tell her you don't want her to hit you, that you don't like it and you need her to stop and she won't- then you do need to get rid of her. I don't agree with the "hold her down on the floor so she'll respect you" thing because it won't work, and that sh*t will escalate faster than you can imagine. If you scare her with physical intimidation, next time she may hit you with a lamp when you aren't expecting it!

Confucius16 · Accepted Answer

Why is she hitting you? Is she hitting you for no reason?

Be a man. You shouldn't have to break up over some hitting. But don't hit her to get even. That won't solve anything.

She hits you, and then when you try to hit her back, she makes you feel guilty, playing on your emotions and excusing her behavior with her apologies. She should also know that she can't just hit you whenever she wants and not expect to get anything in return.

Communicate. Let her know that you do not appreciate her hitting you. Tell her that her actions bother you, and request her to stop. If she tries to hit you, don't hit back, but you can restrain her. However, if she continues to behave in a way that you don't like, despite your repeated attempts to get her to stop, then you can consider breaking up.

R4nd0mdud3r · Accepted Answer

Freaking leave her. She has no excuse to be hitting you unless you are assaulting her. If your solution is literally making her fear you so that she doesn't physically assault you, your relationship has already failed and you need to get out of it. Do not stay in a relationship where you feel that you need to defend yourself. Also, don't hit her unless she has violent intent. You can push her off and even shout at her, but if you hit her you are probably going to prison. To sum it up, get out of relationships that are violent, don't try to gain control through fear, don't hit back, and I don't care how many years you have been together, if neither of you can keep your hands of each other, you shouldn't be in relationships.

Jonathan · Accepted Answer

Is It Normal for My Girlfriend To Hit Me?

It's normal for people in relationships to have disagreements and sometimes argue with each other. However, it's not normal for one person to hit or physically hurt the other person on purpose. If your girlfriend hits you, it's not normal and it's not okay.

There are many ways to resolve disagreements without resorting to violence:

If your girlfriend hits you, it's a sign that she doesn't know how to handle conflict in a healthy way. It's also a sign that she doesn't respect you or your relationship.
If your girlfriend hits you, it's important to talk to her about it. Explain to her that hitting is not an acceptable way to resolve disagreements. If she doesn't want to talk about it or if she tries to justify her behavior, it's a sign that she's not ready to change. In this case, it might be best to end the relationship.
If you're not sure what to do, you can always talk to a therapist or counselor. They can help you figure out how to best handle the situation.

Why Does My Girlfriend Hit Me?

There are a lot of possible explanations for why your girlfriend might hit you, but let's explore some of the more common ones.

1. She's trying to assert dominance over you.

If your girlfriend hits you, it could be because she's trying to establish dominance in the relationship. She might think that by hitting you, she can control you and make you do what she wants.

2. She's angry and taking it out on you.

Another possibility is that your girlfriend is angry and taking it out on you. Maybe she's had a bad day at work or she's feeling stressed about something else in her life. Whatever the reason, she's taking her anger out on you in the form of physical violence.

3. She's trying to get your attention.

It's possible that your girlfriend is hitting you because she's trying to get your attention. Maybe she feels like you're not paying enough attention to her or she wants more of your time. Hitting you might be her way of getting the attention she feels she deserves.

4. She's acting out of jealousy.

Jealousy can also be a motivation for why your girlfriend hits you. Maybe she's jealous of your friendships with other people or she doesn't like it when you talk to other women. Whatever the case, her jealousy is causing her to lash out at you physically.

5. She has a history of violence.

If your girlfriend has a history of violence, it's possible that she's hitting you because it's something she's used to doing. Maybe she was abused in a previous relationship or she grew up in a household where violence was common. Whatever the reason, her history of violence is causing her to act out in a similar way with you.

If your girlfriend is hitting you, it's important to try to figure out why. There could be a variety of reasons why she's doing it, but it's important to try to identify the root cause. Once you know why she's hitting you, you can start to work on addressing the issue and hopefully get it to stop.

What Do I Do if My Girlfriend Hits Me?

If your girlfriend hits you, it can be a difficult and confusing situation. You may feel like you need to defend yourself or fight back, but it's important to remember that violence is never the answer. Here are some tips on what to do if your girlfriend hits you:

1. Try to stay calm and avoid escalating the situation.

This can be difficult, but it's important to remember that violence is never the answer.

2. Talk to your girlfriend about what happened.

Try to understand why she hit you and see if there's a way to resolve the situation without resorting to violence.

3. If you're feeling unsafe, you can always call the police or a domestic violence hotline.

This is the last resort, but it's important to know that there are people who can help if you're in a dangerous situation.

4. Seek professional help if you're struggling to deal with the situation on your own.

A therapist can help you work through your feelings and find a healthy way to cope with what happened.

If your girlfriend hits you, it can be a difficult and confusing situation. But by staying calm, talking to your girlfriend, and getting help if you need it, you can handle the situation in a positive way.

What are the consequences of my girlfriend hitting me?

There are a few potential consequences of your girlfriend hitting you, and it really depends on the severity of the hit and your relationship with her. If it was a light tap and you're both laughing about it afterward, then there aren't really any consequences.

But if she hits you hard enough to leave a mark or she does it frequently, then there could be some serious consequences:

If your girlfriend frequently hits you, it could be a sign of an abusive relationship. No one deserves to be hit, no matter what the reason is. If your girlfriend is hitting you, it's important to reach out for help. There are many resources available to victims of domestic violence, and you don't have to suffer in silence.
Another potential consequence of your girlfriend hitting you is that it could damage your relationship. Trust is a fundamental part of any relationship, and if your girlfriend is hitting you, it's likely that she doesn't trust you. This could lead to a breakup, or it could make it difficult for you to trust her in the future.
Finally, your girlfriend hitting you could also have legal consequences. If the hit is severe enough, she could be charged with assault. This could lead to jail time, a fine, or both. If you're concerned about your girlfriend hitting you, it's important to reach out for help, whether that's from a friend, a family member, a domestic violence hotline, or the police.

AmandaYVR · Answer

Where does she hit you, what part of your body? Why?

Best thing to do is to restrain her. When she lunges at you, get good and fast with deflection and then grab her arms and restrain her. If that doesn't work, hit her thigh with your closed fist once. But beyond that, anything else is unadvisable. You definitely are the more powerful. Without a weapon, you can harm her more than she can harm you, and she knows that. But she's way out of line here, this is totally unacceptable. And she needs to learn that.

coachTanthony · Answer

I don't wanna break up, I love her so much and she's a great girl.

Then suck it up skip! Stop pissing her off where she wants to hit you. And no hitting her doesn't and will not do anything but make you look like a bitch.

Guy13 · Answer

Anger management counseling and management skill training is the best opportunity here... especially if it is hot getting her all flustered.-This is the "Management" portion. Be safe and careful but whatever...

Avicenna · Answer

No, that is abusive behavior. Time to leave her.

Summeroflove · Answer

IT IS NOT NORMAL!!! File criminal charges and find a new girlfriend

Pegases · Answer

You shouldn't hit her back, because in most cases the first thing a woman will do if you hit her, is call the police, and then you're going to be perceived in the wrong even if she hit you first. It's now very common for women to think it's OK for them to put their hands on men, meanwhile they understand that it's not ok for men to put their hands on women. The hypocrisy I blame on the abundance of extreme feminism in today's society, where women are not just encouraged to emasculate men, but praised for it. They tend to feel empowered by it, due to low self esteem and in most cases a troubled childhood. Next, what you can do, is set boundaries, and stand your ground. Most modern women were raised by the culture, so they don't have a lot of healthy examples of intimacy. So unless you make clear what your bounderies are, most of them simply won't know, and as a result will just act how theyve always acted, which won't be in your best interest in the modern day. So the key is to set a boundary, make it clear to her what that boundary is, and ensure she knows you will end the relationship if she crosses that boundary. Then, follow through in walking away if and when she chooses to cross that boundary. Women often only learn to respect mens bounderies/ learn their lesson when they are faced with a man that dumps them because they disrespected his boundary. Collectively as men, that's what more of us need to be doing, instead of giving women passes to consistently disrespect us. Less simps allowing women to disrespect them, and more men respecting themselves enough to set bounderies, and stand on them, irregardless of how much they like a woman is the way forward. Women are a dime a dozen, especially the typical modern woman, so it deosnt serve men to give these kinds of women passes, because they often aren't the kind of women that can offer more than sex and a headache. And a woman that deosnt know how to use her words to communicate, no different than a man in the same situation, is not an emotionally mature human being, and isn't worth losing yourself over. I mean this in the most encouraging way possible, man up. I'm rooting for you.

lightbulb27 · Answer

I'd wonder when she hits you, like what is going on? Arguining/disagreeing? PMS time?

Do not hit her for that reason, not in the USA anyways. Police will always take down the male, right or wrong. Sorry... but your the man, and it sucks sometimes.

You have to try to find a mutual solution when talking to her as it sounds like when she loses control, she's physical and hits. You just wait as she ages, hormones change and such, it could get worse if no solution in place. More than likely, she learned this as a child to act out rather than how to vent her emotions.

One solution would be to get a punching bag she can outlet her aggressions.

Work on ones inner self (both) is in order to change the dynamic of how she expresses emotions. This is true of many people. She cannot control her hormones. Therapy can help, so can studying watching videos, meditating, etc.. Babies... can change all this dynamic including the 1st, 2nd, 3rd.

You just might end up as an abused husband, I hope not. Hopefully she can have a "come to jesus" transformation. Thus, having a therapist in your court to help guide you is a good idea, or someone you can talk to. I know plenty of men who get beatup by women, but it's usually emotionally. Relationships take work, you have to decide how to love this person, in spite of their flaws and yours.

I'd wonder the power and personality dynamic between you. Are you the gentle sweet guy and she's... stronger? Sometimes opposites draw...

Finchie40 · Answer

Why is she hitting you in the first place? What is the reasons? And second, no it isn’t ok if a girl is hitting you period , that is abuse , so yes, you shouldn’t hit a girl , but next time she goes to hit you , take her ass to the ground , meaning you don’t have to punch her but grab her wrists and take her ass To the ground wile looking in her eyes and tell her you ever hit me again , you aren’t going To be able to see me next time, and tell her
To go get some fucking help , it sounds like she was physically abused growing up by her parents etc. But whatever the case, tell her you are not tolerating physical abuse from her anymore that she better go see a therapist and get some fucking help or this relationship is over , if she doesn’t go get help and she tries to attack you again , Have her arrested , call the cops and explain that she is physically attacking you and stay away from her until the police arrive, Stand your ground and don’t let her just come right back to you , make it clear to her that you will not tolerate this abuse whatsoever , I had an ex arrested that was physically abusive as well , As much as I wanted to knock her the fuck out I didn’t , I just restrained her and took her to the ground to make it clear to her that if she ever lays a finger on me again this relationship is over , so you are doing the right thing by scarring her but also make it clear she needs help as well and that is she does t get it you no longer want to see her.

RavVid · Answer

Had a similar experience with one girl who would become intensely angry at times. Not genuinely angry with me but she would take her anger of other things out on me. Initially it was verbal anger but it became physical.

The seminal moment was when in an intense rage she started to punch knee and kick. I didn't want to hurt her of course but necessarily needed to defend myself. The upshot was she called the police because I hurt her hand in blocking her punches. Fortunately the police realized she was pyscho. Don't strike her to show her it hurts. LEAVE!

GET OUT! You may not want to but you need to. She has deep issues and it will only get worse. In my case the girl had been sexually abused as a child and I am quite sure that is where the anger came from.

Her punches probably hurt you more emotionally than physically but every punch is extending the boundaries of her violence and normalizing it. Don't wait till she starts picking up kitchen knives. Don't think you can fix her you can't. The night before that girl hurt her hand punching me, she had assaulted me whilst I was asleep. I don't know why I went back the next night to talk it out only to be assaulted again.

GET OUT now.

Yoonho · Answer

Love her? Okay so even if you dont love her still dont hurt her. I mean dont hit her back. That will prove that you do not love her. And important matter is you will look weak and not a man. Be manly. Keep your respect. Hiting anyone is something really bad. I know girls do that in a thought that i Won't hurt bcz girls aren’t that strong physically. And thinks you can bear that enough. She is being annoying, most of the girls are like this (including me).

Solution is that : 1) if you think you can accept that cz you want her, then You'll get used to (still not so good)

2) if it really hurts. Sometimes it not only just hurt but also a matter of pride. And if you think you dont like these stuffs and the percentage is more than the percentage of your affection for her, break up. Talk like a man, say you can't do with it.

3) dont want to get hit but want her. If you really can't take these but dont want to be apart from her,,,, when both You're happy, with a smiley face say that you like her a lot but dont feel good with getting hit. Let her know it. Next time if she hits be in a serious face (no anger) approach her, stop her right away from hitting you, softly take her stamp to the wall like You're about to kiss then look into her eyes and say" never do it again. You Won't. Cz i can't hurt you. So dont give me pain. I dont want to hit you back. So never hit me." Do these stuffs. If still She's like that, she might be crazy or childish. Boy, mind your girl. Nothing left to say

DoctorKillJoy · Answer

I doubt if she's trying to hurt you, it sounds like she wants you to hit her back like a kinky sex game spank her bottom once and tell her to stop or you'll do it again I think that will help you find out if she likes being hit/spanked and think its fun or if she's actually being abusive, I'm sure she just wants you to be a little more aggressive with her I used to say dumb things to my ex to hear him get frustrated and yell because I thought it was hot, after a while he figured I thought it was hot so he did it purposely to turn me on..maybe something like that is going on?

SmileGirl95 · Answer

Aww, it's cute that you love her a lot :) You shouldn't hit her, because you never know how hard it could be, and if it hurts her a lot she could tell her family or the police and get you into trouble. I think you should tell her that you do love her and don't want to break up but you don't appreciate her hitting you. If she hits you because she's mad at you, then maybe ask her to talk to you about why she's mad rather than being aggressive towards you, so you can solve your problems without violence :) xx

samhradh_leannan · Answer

You should not hit her. But she should not be hitting you either. You are in an abusive relationship, and that needs to stop. Some girls (not generalizing, just some) are stupidly under the impression that it is okay for them to hit guys just because they are girls. Your girlfriend could be in this boat. If you want to give her one more chance, explain to her that it is abusive, disrespectful, and unacceptable for her to treat you that way, and tell her that if she ever hits you again, your relationship will be over. If this doesn't do the trick, or if you don't want to give her another chance (wouldn't blame you), then break up with her now.

ahmetakkaya · Answer

This is a difficult question to answer. On one hand, you may feel that you need to hit back in order to stop your girlfriend from hitting you. On the other hand, you may be concerned about the potential consequences of doing so, including hurting your girlfriend or even breaking up with her. Ultimately, it is up to you to decide what you think is best in this situation.

If you do decide to hit back, it is important to do so in a controlled and calculated manner. You don't want to hit your girlfriend too hard, as this could cause serious injury. You also don't want to hit her so lightly that she doesn't take your warning seriously. Aim for a middle ground, and make sure to deliver your punch with conviction.

If you decide against hitting back, there are other ways to put fear into your girlfriend so that she won't hit you again. One option is to verbally threaten her. Let her know that you will not tolerate being.

VanillaSalt · Answer

First off does she really know you won’t hit her? She begs you not to hit her then yeah she thinks you will. Furthermore your best leaving. The moment you lay your hands on her your arrested. These people don’t change.

But if your dead set on staying together… let her hit you in front of a camera then punch the ever living fuck out of her. It sounds disgusting but bullies only bully until you fight back. Women here in America think they can because there’s no consequence. If we hit back other men and women will whoop your ass and the police will arrest you regardless who started it. Men and women aren’t equal in America. Women are given much greater allowance then men.

EmyyWolf · Answer

Did you do something to her lol.

The best thing to do is get loud or yell. If she’s gonna throw hands like a toddler, you need to get firm and strong and use your vocal cords.

That’s what my Dad used to do. He wouldn’t lay a finger on anyone, but his voice is so deep and loud, and if he yelled it was like an explosion happened in your face. Yell at her and shout at her. If words don’t help. It’s time to get loud.

I’m thinking; she thinks it’s normal because a parent or family member of her used to hit her, when she was little.

OfMiceandMen · Answer

Have you told her she is hitting you hard, like there is playfighting and then there's like bruising someone...

Just because you're a guy you she shouldn't hit you so hard she's leaving a mark every time, that is abuse.

I would tell her and if she makes fun of you, then tell her if she doesn't cut it out, your done. It may take the just the threat of leaving her to make her stop.

I worry that if you hit her back with equal force, she may tell someone else what you did and you could get in trouble.

Amy10223 · Answer

No, you shouldn't hit back, but you need to run away form this aggressive female as far as you can. She does not love you, otherwise, she would not hit you. Unless she has a warped sense of humor. Don't even think about marrying her, it will become worse. She will NOT change her ways, she will NOT control her aggression, she will become worse. How do I know? I live next to a biracial couple, white man, black woman. The woman is always screaming her head off every other weekend. They have a child together and she does not mind screaming and carrying on in front of the child. Do yourself a favor, and find someone who loves you and does not HIT you.

Chazmatazz269 · Answer

It’s normal, but that doesn’t mean you should tolerate it. Break up with her immediately. Permanently cease contact of all kinds with her. Seek professional help if your region offers any, and if she pursues you investigate your legal options, if you have any. Find a support group so that you don’t feel so alone. Western society is still completely ignorant and obstinate about male victims of abuse at the hands of females. It’s a nearly impossible journey to recovery. You will need help, and it’s okay to ask for it.

fireaway · Answer

You know what?I think you are great, because you are Brazillian?So your a huge guy? Everytime, she tries to hit you, try to defense yourself like cover with your arms .. cover yourself with your arms ..

Shes' just literally cuddling. being sweet :)

But never hit her back.

And you can talk about it--- be honest that this MATTER bothers you.

Is it normal my girlfriend to hit me?

Is It Normal For My Girlfriend To Hit Me?

Reasons Women Hit Men

What To Do When Your Girlfriend Hits You

Should You Stay With A Girlfriend Who Hits You?

How Do You Get Your Girlfriend To Stop Hitting You?

Most Helpful Opinions

Artificial Intelligence

Is It Normal for My Girlfriend To Hit Me?

Why Does My Girlfriend Hit Me?

1. She's trying to assert dominance over you.

2. She's angry and taking it out on you.

3. She's trying to get your attention.

4. She's acting out of jealousy.

5. She has a history of violence.

What Do I Do if My Girlfriend Hits Me?

1. Try to stay calm and avoid escalating the situation.

2. Talk to your girlfriend about what happened.

3. If you're feeling unsafe, you can always call the police or a domestic violence hotline.

4. Seek professional help if you're struggling to deal with the situation on your own.

What are the consequences of my girlfriend hitting me?

What Girls & Guys Said

Is it normal my girlfriend to hit me?

Is It Normal For My Girlfriend To Hit Me?

Reasons Women Hit Men

What To Do When Your Girlfriend Hits You

Should You Stay With A Girlfriend Who Hits You?

How Do You Get Your Girlfriend To Stop Hitting You?

Most Helpful Opinions

Artificial Intelligence

Is It Normal for My Girlfriend To Hit Me?

Why Does My Girlfriend Hit Me?

1. She's trying to assert dominance over you.

2. She's angry and taking it out on you.

3. She's trying to get your attention.

4. She's acting out of jealousy.

5. She has a history of violence.

What Do I Do if My Girlfriend Hits Me?

1. Try to stay calm and avoid escalating the situation.

2. Talk to your girlfriend about what happened.

3. If you're feeling unsafe, you can always call the police or a domestic violence hotline.

4. Seek professional help if you're struggling to deal with the situation on your own.

What are the consequences of my girlfriend hitting me?

What Girls & Guys Said

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