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| Posted 4 months ago |
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Category Behavior |
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The truth that lies in me
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A lot of people ask me why I don't believe in love anymore.
It's really not that hard to see why.
Look around you.... all the lies you hear..see.. and feel..
tell me, how will you know what's real..
I haven't been in many relationships, but it feels like enough.
I admit, I've hurt many in the past... But I've been hurt many times as well.
I promised myself to never fall in love agian.. but for some reason I'd get fooled, blinded, and then hurt, again.
Going back to when I was the happiest.. was the most.. magical, of all I've ever experienced.
While it lasted, it felt like a dream, but so real, so real I could almost taste it.. I could still remember everything so clearly.. the first night I let myself love again, and the night I let myself get lost in his eyes... ..
......nothing lasts forever
As clearly as I remember the good times..
is as clearly as the pain I still feel in my heart.
I try to keep busy everyday, and convince myself that everything will be okay
but when I step back and look at myself from a distance..
I realize how much I've isolated myself from the world,
and how sad I've become
I constantly put on a show, convincing people that I'm alright.. joking around, laughing, smiling.. I've been doing it for so long now, that I've convinced myself as well, of a lie that I cant seem to runaway from....
but.... I see it when I look in the mirror
I hear it when I wake up in the middle of the night
and I feel it when I see lovers looking into each other's eyes
I've become so cold
So angry.. at the world.. at myself...
....so dark, and lonely...
the silent tears I cry when the world is asleep
But no one will ever know, and will ever see...
....the truth that lies in me
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