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Breaking Up As Friends? No Thank You!
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Breaking Up As Friends? No Thank You!
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We've all come this dreaded moment... the break up point. Whether mutual or one-sided it always comes to an end. Yet it is what happens during the 20 days after this point that will determine the relationship you will have with that certain someone who has shared a portion of your life.
In most cases (without abuse, anger problems, divorce, etc) one person will wish to still have a significant role in the other's life! Nothing wrong with that, but you should never try to be something you weren't during or before your relationship. What does that mean? Well most relationships are built from a glance, conversation, or even lust. Notice that friendship is not on that list! Since most relationships do not start as friendships, they should never attempt one after a breakup.
How do I know if we can at least give friendship a shot?
1) Were you hang out buddies before dating or sexual activities started?
2) Did you refer to this person as a friend before any interest arouse?
3) During the relationship, did you retain any aspect of friendship?
4) Can you be emotionally secure seeing your ex happy with someone else?
If both parties can honestly say YES to these questions, then it is possible and feasible to pursue a strong friendship beyond the breakup point! IF you said no or even hesitated, then the best course of action would to simply be acquaintances.
Why? Well after most breakups, one party (usually the dumped) will still have relationship status on their mind. "What went wrong?" "I can fix it" "Was it my fault?" "Does that person still love me?". To have either party enter into an unwanted friendship could spell disaster! Even if rules are set (Rules are meant to be broken!) So do yourself a favor... No matter how much it may hurt losing someone... Things will always work themselves out if you just let it go.
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