BATTLEROYALE#
Why am I single? That's a question I ask myself everyday. In middle school I was typically a very sad, lonely teenager who had no friends and all. The kids in my class disliked me because I was the ugly weird kid. My friends were more accepted and viewed as prettier or more normal then me, so I was always left alone or to my own devices. Girls would often give me dirty looks and call me ugly, fat and disgusting and one dude said, "Eww...if my girlfriend was ugly as her I'd throw her off something!"
Even when I tried to be nice to a few guys or girls they were always passive aggressive and judgmental. What I found funny was people would say my friends were ugly, fat, but people still liked them. Hell my friend was bragging about how she was 13 and already was having sex with her boyfriend. I saw girls who get the guys that I want and I just smile and be happy for them and wonder why I can't be like them.
Years later suddenly I became attractive to people. People started to comment on my appearance and tell me how beautiful I was, said I had nice hair and I was an interesting person. Guys were suddenly nicer; for the first time in years guys actually went out their way to buy me things or be friendly. It was weird change for me. I wasn't used to people being so nice so I often had violent thoughts and fantasies about abusing people and doing horrible things to them.
Even the nicest people I had at least one or two horrible thoughts about them. It was like I was emotionally detached from people because I didn't feel bad about having these thoughts since I never acted upon them. It's amazing what long term abuse and bullying can do to a person. But I'm better now. Being single has given me the chance to build my character and be the best I can be for myself and others.
But despite that I am still single. Why am I single? Because i didn't find the right guy to date yet, life isn't a race, life isn't a test of who is faster, life is isn't a game, and I'm still young, and I know one day, I'll find the right guy for me. Even if he doesn't show up as soon as I like, I know he's out there somewhere.
What Girls & Guys Said
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I am single because I haven't found the right girl for me yet. However, I can't be proud of being single. I'm very much a romantic. Two is better than one for me.
I'm single cuz I'm not a fuckboy and i don't like to make love with any girl