You Just Don't Understand

titoloco
Have you ever been the guy who was often clueless about what was going on? You had a fight with your girlfriend or a girl and you wondered, jeez what's her problem it's just the birthday of some random girl. She screams at you for no reason because she feels you don't care about her, but she doesn't seem to take into account all the times you drove her to some place she wanted to go and you didn't, all the times you were there for her and you didn't have to but did. How do girls thank you... you're such a jerk for not remembering this or that.

Those might sound familiar to some, but to others it might be new. What is women's problem, making life so complicated for us men. Well actually, you might be surprised that there isn't any problem between the both of you...What!. Yup, you heard me. How can there be so much conflict yet there isn't anything wrong with each other as a person. It all boils down to one simple skill called listening and the way the message is conveyed. You might say "dude I listen to weird stuff all the time" "I know what listening is about" well do you? Why did she have to scream at you then, just to get heard, why did she call her friends angry about not feeling understood. Oh yeah right I know...because you listened to her. No my friend you need re-learn that skill. God made us with TWO EARS AND ONE MOUTH so that we could listen twice as much as we speak.
understanding women
Let me first start by explaining to you how women communicate. Women speak using either passive or active voice when they are trying to explain a simple actions (1 meaning). 1st Example: *Linda kissed George (active voice) *George was kissed by Linda (passive voice).

Where it gets complicated and very confusing often is when they want to explain complex actions ( 2+ meanings). Women's brain was biologically designed to be able to track down PAST/PRESENT/FUTURE with more than one story lines unfolding at the same time. Our manly brain was designed to keep track of any object within a defined space. So how does this translate to conversation? 2nd Example: *Bill heard the trampling of the hickers. This sentence can be understood in two ways. 1. Bill heard the kickers trampling (something). 2. Bill heard (someone) Trampling the hickers. Only one sentence was stated, but two meaning were conveyed. How do you as a man choose which one is the correct meaning when you have a 50% chance of correct answer.

Just imagine this concept now, but with a woman that has been talking to you for 5 hours. How much content was expressed in all the words she used and how much content you could miss on a daily basis from not understanding how to listen. Just because you already know how.
"Women speak using either passive or active voice when they are trying to explain a simple actions"
What does it mean to listen then. Listening is what people do everytime a soundwave gets to the eardrum and get interpreted by the brain. You could argue that all listening is the same, but I'll disagree by saying that the main variation comes from the depth. What the f... were you smoking man? lol, nothing really I just sat down one day in the cafeteria one day and started doing just that for weeks. To focus on what do women verbalize. What I noticed is that it's not really about what women are saying EXAMPLE 1, it's about what meanings are being conveyed that you should pay attention to Example 2. The friends that girls have often understand the meaning of all the words she uses in her vocabulary and often don't missunderstand what she was trying to say. Strangers, acquaintances and New friends etc... Women don't delay relationships forever for the sake of wasting your time, they do so for the sake of you spending enough time to understand her. What I mean by you need to have more depth in listening what she is saying to you is that as men we have to learn to pay attention to those subtle meanings being conveyed in her verbal diarrhea. To really pay close attention to all that is being said, and implied. If you are feeling lost in her words feel confident enough in saying "wait, a sec did you just say...repeat... and you meant ...this...." then pause and wait for her to correct you.

The more you practice the easier it gets over the years. -_- There is no quick fix to this kind of skill. Skill takes time to develop and it's with experience that you can go faster.

Hope this article enlights some of you.
You Just Don't Understand
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