This is just myTake on signs that you could possibly be dating a player or signs that he is a player.
No Calls
If he never calls and just contacts you through texting then that could be a sign. People nowadays would rather call there loved one so they can hear there voice. If he doesn't call you very often then this could be a bad sign of a player. If he ever makes excuses such as I'm to busy or I have a lot going on then that should tell you something. That he is obviously just playing you and your feelings with no intention of dating. He doesn't care about communicating with you and communication is key in every relationship. Its okay to keep quiet but not to quiet.
Too many friends that are girls
If he has more friends that are girls than guys then that's another sign. Its okay for him to have a couple of girl friends but not all of them. It can cause an overshadow in your relationship with him. And then you might be second guessing yourself as to why you are with him. If he chooses to be with his girls or guys than with you then that's another sign. Keep away from guys like this.
Flirting
A little bit of flirting is healthy in a relationship. But not to the point where it goes overboard and he starts to make it obvious. It starts to become a big problem and sets the relationship down hill. It little bit of flirting can go a long way. He should set his boundaries right so it doesn't upset you. Sometimes it can be obvious that he's flirting with other girls you just have to look closely with your eyes.
Lack of commitment
Your partner should value you to the fullest. He should put time aside for you both to be together every once in a while. If he says he's to busy with his friends or whatnot then that obviously shows that maybe he isn't ready to commit. Or better yet that he isn't ready to do his part in a relationship. A relationship doesn't work unless two people work it out together.
No action just words
Is he good at making you feel special on top of the word. Says he loves you but never shows it? Says he misses you but never comes by to see you. That's another sign of a player. They are good at being sweet talkers what I mean is they know how to drill you in. They say they love you but when you ask them to show you they don't know how. He always knows the right things to say to help you get back up on your feet. He's just using words to make him look good, not you.
Won't try to understand you
Do you ever feel like you try your hardest to tell him how he makes you feel. It's like no matter how hard you try he doesn't understand the words that come out of your mouth. When you are dating, he should at least know something about you. If he doesn't take the time to understand you and just stumps all over you then he's a player. You should not be the one doing all the work in the relationship, it wouldn't hurt for him to try. You deserve better of course.
So yeah, that's my take on players. If he a guy is really into you and wants to be with you then nothing should or would keep him away. I know this because I dated a player once I blame myself though because I was afraid of being along which is why it took me so long to realize that I deserved better. If he flirts with women to much, has to many girls that are friends, makes excuses to even be with you then that's not the kind of guy you deserve to be with. You deserve someone that could at least give you the world. Not someone that just walks all over you like a doormat and doesn't even value you or appreciate you. Never settle for less than what you deserve.
6 Signs That He is a Player
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Anonymous
(30-35)
+1 y
1 - No Calling: I hate talking on the phone. Even with the girl I like. Talking on the phone, to me, is for when you need quick responses. Texting is for when you're communicating but just a casual conversation and are far away from one another, and at the same time, possibly too busy with doing some stuff to the point where you can't call. If I'm baking a cake, for example, I'd rather text because then both hands and my neck are free to bake a cake and I can just check my phone once in a while.
2 - Too many friends that are girls: What is wrong with having female friends? Maybe the guy just gets along better with females than males. The only problem I would see with this is if he is seeing/talking/making time for one or two specific girls but doesn't have time for you. But having too many female friends in general? Nope.
3 - Flirting: I can see this to some extent, but it depends on the guys character. If the guy is just naturally flirty... basically just joking around in a flirtatious way, then no harm no foul. If the guy flirts in a way that is more along the lines of flirting to seriously try and get the girl.. then that becomes the problem.
4 - Lack of Commitment: I agree to some extent. If he always has time for his friends (especially female friends) but doesn't have time for you... then there's a problem.
5 - No action just words: I agree to some extent. Some guys just aren't good at showing that they care. Or their way of showing you that they love you is not what you expect or want.
6 - Won't try to understand you: I agree to some extent. If he just flat out doesn't try, then yes... but sometimes what you think he's doing is not trying, but in reality he's trying very hard but just can't do it, but because he doesn't know how to express himself it comes off as he doesn't try or doesn't care.
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Anonymous
(36-45)
+1 y
Thanks for this, you have gave me the courage to end my relationship, had a feeling he was playing me, everything you say is totally true, spot on in my relationship, its hurtful because i tried to deny it, you have given me that push to end, i have been played too long
Im confused now, because i have been thinking he's using me and playing me. But i tried not to think about it because i like him so much. like she said i desere better than that
Look, she does not describe a player at all. I'm trying to be a master player and I wouldn't do any of what she said. She describes an average Joe who suffers from a bit of nice guy mixed with suplication to be society's man.
No Calls - No one calls anymore it all about texting. Too many friends that are girls - some guys cannot help to be surrounded by girls and is not their fault but the testosterone level. I think girls like gravitate to that, the most popular of guy will have lots of girls, and girls gravitate to those guys. Flirting - you just talking numbers, in fact only19% of men in the world flirt. Lack of Commitment - You right about this. Most guys do not want to commit, but so goes with girls, we have build a society that is uncommitted or do not want to get married. So long as there is a Feminist Movement, there will be no commitment.
No action just words - Here is a matter of character. It takes time to mold a men to women' likening. Men are sweet talkers yes, but women are hard to figure out. Sometimes they demand to much, and when they get what is expected treat men shitty even if men try hard. Like the phrase goes, "Men are from Mars, women are from Venus" You cannot put two world together cause it creates massive destruction. Have to take little steps to bridge the gap. However you cannot say "No action just words" is what make a man a player. Won't try to understand you - I think this is not true. Some girls bring an agenda of how they want their guy to be and try to mold him in way unimaginable. No man expect a girl to be doing all the work in a relationship, if you find yourself doing all the work it is because something is wrong with you and you must change your ways. That same player who did not understand you end up marrying that some special girl who did understand him, then you say why is he with her - and your reaction is the "She is a slut and he will not find happiness with her" But this is not a true saying, so best is to find out what you are doing wrong, if you are working too hard to make the relationship word or just say it is one sided move on. Just like girls say "There is plenty of fish in the water- move one, guys also have same perception."
Signs he's a player. I've got loads. Where do I start... hmmm The having loads of girl friends is true! Prob one of the biggest signs. He also normally has a women 'best friend' and we all know what the best'really means don't we!! They have jobs where they travel a lot, have unpredictable hours but where they can sneak away easily (doctors, firemen, truckers, own their own company etc etc) They are normally very charming and into keeping fit. Especially beware of adrenaline junkies as they are the worst players of the lot. Nothing really gives them the buzz they seek! Often they frequent gyms or are avid cyclists. Again this gives them time out of sight to be naughty. All of them have friends that cheat. It's their sorce of inspiration. All have wayward dads, anger issues and addiction problems. And the vast majority are loners. Think that covers it ;)
So this guy and I been talking for a little over a year. We recently had a disagreement and he was expressing his feelings for me he even went to say " I was going to make it official when I might your mom" but I feel like he's using or saying that to make me forget about what started the argument. Now when we first started talking he texted me all day everyday. We talk on the phone and we used to FaceTime each other all the time. But as time went on I seen all of that fading. We barely talk and when I text him he takes forever to reply or sometimes reply the next day depending on the type of question I ask. Now that brings me to "flirting" he's always leaving these emojis 😍😊😋 on this one particular girls picture. Sometimes she respond and sometimes she don't. Do you think she's the reason why things are changing between us?
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Anonymous
(25-29)
+1 y
I only agree with no action just words along with the lack of commitment
The others could change drastically based on the dynamic of the relationship Things is nowadays guys are just more likely to text... some call only when it becomes more urgent (Mainly for the beginning of the relationship)
The same way some girls are more comfortable with having a bunch of male friends, guys should be allowed to do the same... these double standards being placed on the gender is not fair
Guys are not taught to be in touch with their emotions... so it shouldn't a big surprise if he can't understand you at every moment... that being said women are never clear about what they are going through they consistently play mind games for no reason, guys like direct statements it's how we function That doesn't mean we are cheating or are players...
I hear about the "no calls" thing quite a bit and I wonder how valid it is. Sure it's the 21st century and people love to text, but if he's opposed to calling, that may be a cause for a concern. Players tend to disconnect themselves from their "prey" as much as possible, so as to avoid forming an emotional connection. Calling someone - hearing their voice - triggers a sense of realism. "I'm talking to a real person!" I'd assume connecting through calls rather than texts would emotionally bind the two much more. So if he is opposed to calling, I'd be suspicious. :/
no calling? Eh, no, no, NO! Texting is for arranging meetings and stuff. Planning a date so to speak. It can be done over phone too. Phone is for quick and practical convos where texting doesn't cut it. ALL forms of idle chat, gossip, latest news, and ALL THAT is FACE TO FACE! It's too goddamn meaning full to take over a phone!
I agree on this post for the most part but a few. No Calling: isn't too true in my opinion. I am more of a texter than a talker and I hate when a guy im talking to tries to call me, like only call me if your outside my house or it's an emergency lol
Flirting: you should kinda get a feel of how much of a "flirt" your boyfriend is within the first few times you see him, if you actually pay attention. He won't try to understand you: for a lack of a better word, guys are oblivious lol even if he tries to understand you they still don't understand. Half of the time guys really are oblivious but you can tell when A guy is sincerely oblivious to the situation or is full of shizzle.
But if your gonna break up with someone, I would say to weigh out the pros and cons before you make that final decision.
I completely agree with: "No action just words." When someone talks a lot but never does anything they're suspicious immediately to me... I hate those sort of people.
I'm not sure I agree on the just texting part because most guys now a days prefer texting over talking. This would go back to the person that wrote technology is ruining relationships because it would support their claims as well.
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