Social Networks Set High Expectations For Relationships

Hannah591

I've been guilty of feeling like my relationship is inadequate because all I see on my social networks is media showing perfect relationships or telling you how your relationship should be.


Exhibit #1


Social Networks Set High Expectations For RelationshipsI always wanted to have photos like this together or take photos of us cuddling like others do, but I knew my boyfriend would give me a dazed look if I asked and tell me again that our relationship doesn't need to be broadcasted everywhere. And he's right.


Seeing photos and videos (Exhibit #2) everywhere showing people in perfect relationships made me want to show the whole world my relationship when really, the best relationships don't have to be shown on the internet or proven to strangers. Quite recently I wanted a photo with my boyfriend but I asked myself why would I want to share such a personal moment with random people when I should be enjoying the moment!


Exhibit #2



Don't ask me why people make videos like this, I have no idea why they think it's a cute thing to do. I feel it's a way to say "look at us everyone, we're perfect" but we know relationships aren't always perfect. However, you may watch that and think "my partner and I never do stuff like that together" which could mainly be because you're not a pubescant teenager, but also because most genuine relationships consist of two people with jobs and busy schedules, who don't have time to be messing around with each other all the time. You may be aware of that but some people may feel that their relationship is boring compared to these two and dampen their mood.


Exhibit #3


I have no doubt that some of you have seen images like this on social networks and some of you may have read it and tried to take it on board. Whilst some of these points could be beneficial to your relationship (e.g. 8, 1 & 3) and are fairly obvious (# 1), others could be unhealthy. Aside from some grammatical issues and contradictions (e.g. 3 & 5, 5 & 7), they tell you to "stay sweet" which is similar to the saying "keep sweet". If you watched any of those Amish programmes, you'll know that that saying is for women to stay quiet and obedient to men. If they do her wrong, she mustn't complain. That's something no woman should follow so scrap # 4.
# 5 is quite similar to # 4 and sends a bad message. If your partner hurts you in any way, you need to discuss how you're feeling to them and resolve it, don't try to ignore it just for it to happen again.
# 6, # 10 and # 11 should happen in my opinion. You learn from your past, your past makes you who you are today and that can sometimes cause issues in your relationship which should be discussed. Never talk about break ups? Sometimes that's the only opportunity to find out what someone's really like. You could be dating someone who's been left by everyone they've ever dated for, at the worst, cheating/abuse so you should look into break-ups and why they happened, but that doesn't mean contacting all their ex partners for gossip! And yes you should discuss your ex's at some point. You can find out a whole lot about your partner through their choice of ex's and they were the lessons and stepping stones which lead to them finding you. There's nothing wrong with talking about ex's, your past or break-ups, you can't act like they don't exist. Sometimes those conversations can turn out be comical and enjoyable ones! In short, pictures like these should be taken lightly; they're usually written by young people who are new to the world of dating and now believe they're love gurus.




Every relationship is different and they're certainly not always sunshine and rainbows like it's depicted in the media. If you've ever felt like your relationship was inadequate because of this constant stream of "perfection", remember that your relationship is unique and you both probably have quirks that aren't present in the relationships presented online. You both may find something else more fun to do together other than prancing around in the kitchen and recording it, and that's perfectly okay!

Social Networks Set High Expectations For Relationships
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