How should I feel about my boyfriend commenting on other girls instagram pictures?

Question

Honestly I don't mind him likeing other girls pictures, I mean soometimes it bothers me but I guess that's because I'm a little insecure. But I can let tha go and deal with it. But tonight I saw he commented "figure 😍" on a girls instagram picture. And he has "liked" 90% of her pictures. The comment bothers me quite a bit. I don't comment on other guys pictures out of respect for my boyfriend, I mean I don't know how he would feel of I did the same thing. Should I bring it up to him or am I overreacting?

Rawrzz · Accepted Answer

It's different for guys than it is girls. Men are a lot more physical than women.

The best kind of girlfriend, in my opinion, is one that gets that and doesn't get pissy when her guy notices another hot female. That's actually why I like bi chicks, because they will just be right there with you like, "Yeah, damn, you're right: she's fine."

Guys have something different than females do when it comes to sexuality. We have a physical compulsion to seek out variety. Women don't have this. At least, 90-99% of women don't. To a female, if she's checking out a guy's body, it's usually because she is interested in what he has to offer.

It's usually not *only his body* that she's looking at. She's looking deeper than that. She's looking at what his clothes *say*; she's looking at what he's looking at; she's looking at what he did to get that body and how that translates to his personality.

But, to guys, they are *only* looking at the body. It is completely surface. It doesn't mean you aren't attractive to him; and it doesn't mean that he'll cheat on you; it doesn't mean he doesn't love you. in my opinion, it would be good of you to realize that there's nothing deeper to it. He's only admiring her body.

E. g. Why so many men go to strip clubs, while women do not. Also why female pornstars make a hell of a lot more money than male pornstars. etc.

Now, if he knows her IRL, and *also* likes her. Then you should probably be a bit worried.

You don't just suddenly stop becoming attracted to other people when you get in a relationship. It's unreasonable to expect that, in my opinion. In my opinion, you're overreacting.

Teded · Accepted Answer

These lame social platforms should so be discarded right after one falls into a relationship. It's kinda like the origin of all the problems a lot of couples face.

The fact that you etracked him reveals that you are insecure and it would be best for him to reduce his activity on instagram.. should he be the best man in the world, he would close his account.

There's a whole big world out there without facebook, instagram, etc etc... and perhaps (if it doesn't cross your ethical boundaries) you can explore some intimacy.

Talk with him about it, best in bed while doing his favorite thing, with a sad poorly voice and look. and tell him that you feel insecure and unhappy... but don't make him feel that you are accusing him. coz really, no one likes an accusing bitch. Hug him tight... dig some nails on his back... lie on his chest... and he should feel the... aww... feeling

BumbleSuperBee · Accepted Answer

It depends on their relationship; whether they're close and în the same class or if they barely know each other. some people have a "thing" or a "history" where they comment on each other's pics - it has nothing to do with flirting - so why would him being în a relationship stop him from doing so if that girl doesn't mean anything to him of that kind.. Also, try seeing it from your point of view: how would you feel if a good guy friend of yours who has a girlfriend comented on your pic? Would you see it as a normal thing?

lumos · Accepted Answer

Commenting on and liking things is ok, hypothetically. But I think he crossed a line when he commented on her body and added the 😍 emoji. That's too much. I think that as long as the comments are neutral, it's ok to post them. But clearly his comment wasn't neutral. If my guy did something like that, I'd bring it up in a discussion about boundaries and explain that I think he went too far. Depending on his reaction and if he did it again, I would break up.

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BadOmen · Answer

Bring it up with him in a respectful way. You are trying to clarify a situation, not trying to restrict his freedom. Just make sure that between the both of you, you can comfortable acknowledge people of the opposite sex without feeling like you're being betrayed. This is where shit always goes sideways for young couples, is the lack of communication which leads to built up anger.

Anonymous · Answer

Tbh in my opinion I don't see it as a problem. There's plenty of guys I find attractive and I like their pics on ig but I'm faithful to my bf. Being taken doesn't mean you can't notice when other people are attractive. Again this is my opinion, I trust my bf not to do anything fishy and the way that I think is that if he wants to leave the relationship then okay I have plenty of other guys who wants to be with me so if he wants to replace me I can easily replace him. But in your situation I don't think you should overthink those likes or snaps if it does get to the point where you think he's cheating and got some proof then that's when you start acting but for now don't sweat yourself. 😁😁

xsashax · Answer

Defiantly bring it up to him. You are not overreacting and don't ever think you are. Liking other girls photos that are on his newsfeed isn't a big deal. He shouldn't be commenting that stuff. I mean.. why is it so important to him that the girl needs to know how he feels about her photo? He should be commenting that stuff on yours

deezfieryhands · Answer

You should have a talk with him and confront him about it, get his side.. if he says something like oh that was my friend commenting, he's probably lying, don't let him manipulate you... He shouldn't be commenting things like that because if you're together, you should be the only one that has his attention

Lucasia · Answer

i dont not think you are over reacting for a second! having a need for exclusivity from a romantic partner is human! jealousy is human though its only a problem when you start focusing on that alone rather than maintaining your relationship. communication is key, make sure you're in a space where you're both open to feedback , concerns, uncomfortability, even just getting to know them via random questions you're curious about. bring it up to him, but hold your self, be understanding and listen as well, but state boundaries and make it okay for him to set them too

Tommie21 · Answer

You really should consider a different form of entertainment. You have to consider the source. some of these social media platforms are nothing more than places for everyone to do and say things they wouldn't in person. If you guys are really serious about your relationship, get off of those kinds of websites and do wholesome things together. A good way to end what might ordinarily be a good relationship, is to look at people half dressed or sometimes undressed!

BurCelf · Answer

Definitely nooot overreacting. I have gone back and forth between allowing my husband to look at naked women on Tumblr and stuff. I've finally concluded that I'm not okay with it because the thoughts about her body should be geared towards me. Like I should be the only woman his eyes want sexually. Maybe it's because I'm just insecure, I don't know. But yeah, in my opinion you have a right to be bothered. I'd be pissed.

Anonymous · Answer

Liking pictures is fine, comments are not. What's the difference in approaching a hot girl at the grocery store and saying " I like your body" same thing as commenting " figure 😍😍" . You shouldn't be doing that while in a relationship just like girls shouldn't either. Same for both people. Talk to him, if he doesn't stop, break it off. everyone has different opinions but I'm old fashioned. My grandma and grandfather has known eachother for over 30 years and married for 28 and why did their marriage last so long? Communication and lack of social media. It ruins things

capturemyheartnow · Answer

Just commenting on any girl's pictures should not worry you much. But if he tries to get closer to that girl and meets her on a regular basis will definitely worry you a lot. So look out for what they are really up to. The situation can deteriorate into an actual problem for you if he really falls in love with this girl.

EmHenz · Answer

i think if you're feeling insecure about it, you should DEFINITELY talk to him about it. tell him that it's bothering you and that you wish he can stop doing that. if he continues doing so then he's probably a guy not worth having because it doesn't affect him when you are sad.

nandinikhaneja · Answer

why don't you comment on other guys picture, unless your boy is hanging out with other girls without telling you. you are feeling insecure just because he is liking some other girl picture... you should not have a feeling of that

ProbablyTooMature · Answer

I would say it's inappropriate. But I also think that IG is stupid and with how immature people are in general it's made monumentally worse by social media.

PikaPower0225 · Answer

so do girls comment inappropriatly on guys posts on social media? i follow male celebrities and i see girls saying inappropriate stuff too. So if ur so uncomfortable of your boyfriend saying inapporpriate things, then do something about it.

Anonymous · Answer

Men don't need to lie about liking other girls bodies and to feel aroused by them... he has not dumped you so don't worry... at least you know he is honest and now you know who he likes... there nothing wrong in those comments... he may love you but as a man he must keep his options open... you never know when you are going to break up.. maybe you will dump him who knows

Dlg1979 · Answer

I am having a similar problem, only were not exclusive. We cuddled, he kissed me on the top of my head. I really thought he liked me. He commented on a friend's fb picture "not bad at all" I'm ignoring him until he asks me what's wrong.

ZOOON · Answer

I mean if it's bothering you then yeah you should bring it up always be honest with your significant other, let your feelings be known cuz if you hold it in it just going to build up and you're going to snap

Anonymous · Answer

You should talk to him about it and you're not overreacting. A man should only want and only have his attention on his woman, not anyone else. Im sure he would not like it too if you do the same to him.

luvstoned4him · Answer

Nothing wrong with commenting on other people's pics as long as its done in a respectful manner and with respect of you having a bf/gf.

Anonymous · Answer

Liking pics is fine  But the comment  OUT OF LINE  You need to talk to him about it

How should I feel about my boyfriend commenting on other girls instagram pictures?

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