I met my boyfriend David and our friend Rob on the same night. I was instantly into David and we started dating. I became good friends with Rob as... Show More
Most Helpful Opinion
I was in a similar situation with a guy I dated once. Apparently, he was a very hard-headed fella when it came to things like that lol. We argued about it several times over the course of the time we dated. Obviously, you did nothing wrong other than being a friend to one of his buddies. Unfortunately, you had no idea that Rob sent such a hateful message to his buddy before he contacted you, and he probably sent it because he was drunk and being stupid when David wouldn't answer. Right now, you've done everything you needed to do to fix the situation. You've apologized, explained what happened, and you want to make ammends. The only downfall is that it is up to David to meet your efforts halfway. What I had to do with the guy I dated was send him an email explaining what happened and that I had plenty of people that would vouch for it, and then I just let it be. I know that is going to be the hardest part, especially if you really like this guy. You could go ahead and shoot his best buddy a message and explain to him what happened. Don't beg him to talk to David for you (the last thing any guy wants is to be brought into drama), but simply tell him what happened and that you have tried to explain things to David and apologized for anything that you may have done to offend him (even though you didn't know about the message). Tell Harlan that you really like David and have feelings for him and you wanted to know that if he happens to speak to David, or see him in the near future if he would let him know that you didn't mean to do anything to hurt him, and if you would have known about the message you would have never helped Rob out. Then leave it at that for awhile. Give David some time to deal with the anger he has about the situation and the space he needs to handle it. In about a week, try texting or messaging him to see how he is doing and apologize again, saying that you would have never done it if you had known. The longest it ever took me to get a response was a week, but it usually didn't last a few days- he just needed space to calm down.