Relationship with no physical attraction?

How important is physical attraction to a relationship?

Here's my issue: Let's say my crush's name is "A" and his best friend's name is "Z". I've liked A for a long time, but to be honest, we don't talk much and we hardly have anything in common. Z and I have become really good friends lately, and he's a lot easier for me to talk to.

Several people I know pointed out to me a while back that Z seems to have romantic feelings for me. I've been noticing since then that he's starting to flirt with me a lot. I think he's a really nice guy, and admittedly, if he looked like A, I'd date him in a heartbeat. But the thing is, he doesn't, and I'm really not physically attracted to him at all. Would it make sense to pursue Z with the hopes that he'll start to become more physically attractive to me? Is that even possible?


Most Helpful Guy

  • I know what you mean, and I'm glad to find a girl who's honest and mature about the issue. It's a painful issue, speaking as a guy...

    I'd say you're really better off keeping Z as a good friend, because it sounds like your relationship is truly valuable...if you really don't see anything happening between you and him, you can even tell him how great a friend he is, and that you want to keep things that way. (Now that's hard on both his part and yours, but it should be done sooner rather than later.) Try getting to know A a little bit better, but know that it'll be an empty relationship unless you can connect with him personality-wise. Ideally, you should be with someone who you're attracted to AND who you can relate to very well. Best of luck.

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      Thanks, that was really great advice.