I hit and beat up my girlfriend?

Question

Me and my girlfriend have been together for a while now, I'm 22, and she is 20. She is so beautiful, kind, and caring. I started getting overprotective over her, controlling her, reading her messages, watching her Facebook account, etc. She has male friends which I get really jealous about, sometimes I think she is cheating on me so I get angry at her. A few nights ago, she came back around midnight because she had a night out with her friends, she knows her place, she knows what time I expect her to be in at. I heard her trying to sneak in without me noticing, because she knows I will get mad at her, possibly hit her, I went downstairs, lost my temper at her, pushed her to the floor, pulled her hair, kicked her in the legs and stomach, punched her, gave her a nose bleed, called her hurtful names, and shouted in her face. She was in tears, I feel ashamed with what I've done to her. After this, she has been scared of me, whenever I raise my hands or touch her she flinches. I've slapped her, and punched her a few times before. She always accepts my apologizes, but I never change. She NEVER did anything to me, I feel ashamed as a man that I've done to a women. She has been crying a lot recently because she is scared of me I think. Since what happened she also tries to cover up what I did to her body. Should I let her go and make her happy? I even got in her face and said if she tells anyone I'd brake her bones and make her suffer. The other thing is I feel kinda and happy when I hit her or beat her up. After hitting her or beating her up, I go to the pub with my mates and get drunk. Do I need help? I also don't even help her after I beat her, like I leave her laying on the floor crying with a blood everywhere and go and get drunk. I feel ashamed with how I've treated a lady, but I don't know, I just feel so proud and happy about it sometimes, I feel like I own her and control her. Should I make her happy and let her leave me? If you think about it, it's funny...

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Yeah no sympathy from me. Your not a victim. You're in control and you're a dick. First let me point out some important issues:
"She knows her place"
"Should I let her"
To me you sound like someone who doesn't respect the sentience of others. She's a woman, a living being with a mind. She is not yours. You do not own her. Your happiness and pride comes from getting your way. Your sadness and regrets comes from your conscience telling you what you already know is wrong. Men who control women are fearful. Your too afraid to let her do as she pleases because you don't believe anyone would love you on their own will and right now you'd be right. She doesn't love you she fears you. It's called Stockholm syndrome. In all honesty she's doing her best to appease you simply to reduce the pain until she dies. Life with you is a prison she's trying to make pretty. If she wasn't afraid of you she would leave and you know this. You're a coward. Accept that. It's the only way your gonna change. You've hurt her and that damage is done and it's just a matter of time for something to happen to help her realise your not as powerful as she thinks and you will be alone. Either that or you'll stay with her till one of you dies neither one of you ever knowing love. Your love is a lie. The second she feels an opportunity to leave she will. You've failed. Nothing else to say about that relationship. Now suck it up be a man. Men aren't afraid of loosing a women. Men aren't afraid to let her enjoy her life her way. Men don't feel the need to control others because men don't fear what they might do. You don't have to be this way. Acting this way is pathetic. You whether or not you want to admit it have the capacity to be a better man. End the relationship. Encourage her to move on and find a safer place to live. Then take sometime off for yourself alone to cope with and understand what you've done. None of this is healthy. None of this is necessary. AND MOST IMPORTANTLY YOU ARE NOT A VICTIM. You did this these are your actions that you must now live with. Learn to cope with them. Otherwise prepare for the life you deserve one of ostracization, hate, disgust, and loneliness. You can be happy healthy and enjoy the rest of your life in peace but that takes looking inwardly and understanding yourself, your biases and misconceptions, your fears, your desires, your flaws not forcing the outside world to comply with your wishes. Life doesn't work like that and never will.

0903ccm1 · Accepted Answer

Wow. That is absolutely disgusting and abhorrent. I didn't even want to continue reading. I am against violence in general but a man hitting a woman (especially one that cares / loves him) is just sickening and repugnant.

You should be in jail, seriously. There is no place in society for men that attack women. If I knew her I would be coming to see you and calling the police for her. Short of jail you need serious help / therapy.

Besides the violence you sound very controlling and that is not healthy - "she knows her place"? What the hell is that? You don't own her. She isn't property and should have freedom to do as she wishes - she deserves that!

You ask, should you leave her so she can be happy. Are you trying to imply that you care for her? That is BS! If you cared for her you would never hit her - that is never acceptable. You try to justify what you've done, and done REPEATEDLY. There is NO justification. It is F****KING SICK. Eventually you'll could probably kill her. You, no doubt, have already damaged her physically and emotionally so much that she is scarred and won't be her same self for a long time if ever and will have serious trust issues with other men - or should I say REAL men, who know hitting a woman is despicable and pathetic.

If you haven't already you need to LEAVE IMMEDIATELY and never contact her again. Then you should turn yourself to the police or some treatment center.

The fact that you think its funny is absolutely disgusting and just further convinces me you are a complete psychopath. That is what a sociopath would do / think.

I am reporting this post to the website as hopefully they can track your IP and get it to the police so they can make sure this poor girl is safe and you are locked up. I don't say this lightly - you do not deserve to be part of society.

Deezyy · Accepted Answer

Nothing about this is funny. I'm quite positive you don't love her and I'm also certain whatever love she felt for you is going to be replaced with resentment and fear. Stop fucking up her life. She deserves better. She's probably afraid you'll kill her if she leaves because you sound like a lunatic. You also remind me of a bully I once knew, using your strength against a woman! Pfft shame on you punk! If you know you're wrong and can't stop then let her go, and stop assuming you're going to get away with this forever. You'll get yours somehow. Its best to make things right before someone else steps in the picture, most likely the cops. And fyi woman beaters get their asses mollywhopped in jail. There's no hiding places for cowards. Clean up your act before it's too late. Apreciate your woman don't push her into hating you or worse.

Esplorare · Accepted Answer

Yes, you need help. You seem to lack empathy and concern for her wellbeing which is very disturbing and abnormal. Guys like you get brutalized behind bars by the way. You may think it's funny but in the meanwhile, you are building a case against yourself which could be used against you in ways that are worse beyond imagination from what you've done to her.

MeghanL · Accepted Answer

I don't think it's funny. Beating a woman is not acceptable under any circumstances.

If you are truly remorseful then you need to get into counseling & learn how to control your feelings, & more importantly how you act on them. You do not have the right to use someone as your human punching-bag.

Good luck to you, & take care.

hsshannah96 · Accepted Answer

What in the living fuck is wrong with you? You’re lucky I don’t call the police on your ass. Did she hit you first? if the answer is no then it’s absolutely unacceptable and unpermissible to pull your girlfriends hair, to hit her and call names at her!!!

dangerDoge · Answer

1.) Not cool, nor funny.
2.) If you want what is best for her, leave her immediately. You better ask for forgiviness for the abusive relationship you put her through. This abuse may screw up her life and bring fear to all her future relationships. There is a good chance she hasn't left you yet because she feels trapped by your abuse.
3.) If you want what is best for you, leave her immediately. Abuse is a serious crime, and you'll get jail time soon enough,
4.) There is no justification for abusing a woman. You shouldn't feel proud of it, you should feel disgusted with yourself that you would stoop that low to hit her for no good reason. This relationship is already ruined, but if you ever want a future relationship, you need to go to therapy and learn to control your aggressive and possessive tendencies. These "happy" and "proud" feelings are bad. VERY BAD. Seek help, get therapy.

Apologize profusely to her and let her go. Leave her. There have been women that have died from the abuse their husbands have pulled on them.

Anonymous · Answer

Yeah so that's called ABUSE and is completely unacceptable. You need to get therapy and learn to control yourself. I really hope you're just a troll.

Konvin · Answer

because of guys like you, women trust guys less. Because of pricks like you, it has been harder for me to find a girlfriend... Now i have one and i could only do these things to her if she'd be violent towards me first. Which she never is, and never would be. You're a psychopath and you need help. And the girl too. She needs a guy who loves her and doesn't beat her up. Someone who treats her nicely. Because she seems to be very innocent. A girlfriend is to caress. Not to beat up. That's what punching bags are for. You only beat up a girl if she threatens you with a knife, or is putting you in danger of getting beat up by her. Only then. Which seems to be absolutely not the case here. Get help, and leave her alone. Let her go away from your danger.

cinderelli · Answer

leave her alone..

rima2000 · Answer

I don't find this funny at all, abusing your girlfriend is not a joke. She better leave you as soon as possible and you obviously have a psychological problem, go get help before you end up in prison wich is probably what's going to happen to you soon.

JuicyBrain · Answer

I think you have a mighty good reason to be ashamed you piece of shit. You should keep on being ashamed behind bars. The fact that there are much, much better men than you who can't find a girlfriend baffles me. I have absolutely no respect or pity for you and if I was to meet you, I'd spit in your face. I hope you step barefooted on a rusty nail...

XOXOME16 · Answer

1st of all Its not funny. 2nd your girlfriend is a complete dumbass for staying with you. Like wtf is she on. 3rd abuse is a crime. She's probably telling her friends and her friends are probably telling other people. Soon her parents are gonna know and then what? You'll be in jail. You don't own her so stop acting like a psychotic asshole.

aguy77 · Answer

Yes you need help.

At this point it is better for her if she breaks up with you.

If you want to be protective, you need to protect your girlfriend from yourself, and sometimes even from your overprotectiveness.

WhatTheHellAmy · Answer

You need help, let her go and I hope she finds a good man.  I know, you're angry because she cheated, but come on, just move on, let her go, why do you want a cheater to be with you?

Chris_Pratt · Answer

Cool story bro.

Littlett25 · Answer

Oh so you can go out after you beat the crap outta her but she can't have a night with friends? That's some fabulous logic. Anyways, you need some mental help and you should let her go.

Sara413 · Answer

I have a feeling you're trolling, but in case you arent: Yes, you need help. Yes, you need to let her go so she can be happy.  No, it's not fucking funny.;

JSmuve · Answer

Nice troll dipshit.

Mesonfielde · Answer

Man, writing up so much nonsense must have taken effort.

Frost_Byt3 · Answer

This HAS to he a troll. If not, i have officially lost my faith in humanity. 😒

Bards · Answer

I hope you go to jail and get fucked up. You dont own anyone.

Drooogie4 · Answer

Haha god this better be a joke. If not I hope you rot in prison.

HollywoodGlam · Answer

Talk with a counselor about your anger issues. Even if you apologized to her, I doubt she will accept it because you abused her so badly.

BellePepper · Answer

Welp. Congratulations on being a terrible liar and a terrible human being.

jakeofalltrades · Answer

What the fuck. guys like you are why most women hate men. you deserved to be beaten, see how the fuck you like it. she needs to leave you,

I hit and beat up my girlfriend?

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