I think I like (really like ) my best (girl) friend.

Okay, so there is this girl, we have been friends since the beginning of college. Anyway while I kind of thought she would be okay to date, I never really wanted to while she was singe, and was kind of grossed out by it, but lately I've felt more attracted to her, but she has a great boyfriend and I don't want to ruin their relationship. I need a way to get over her, but it's hard because I'm not really friends with a lot of girls (although I know quite a few), and it's hard for a guy like me to get a girl. Any suggestions

just an update, but more and more I've fell out of love with her, plus her boyfriend and girlfriend are having problems (not because of me,or so I think) so I've kind of started avoiding her

Most Helpful Girl

  • I suppose it all depends on your exact ages and dating/flirting/relationship experience, but I'm getting the big warning bell that says you became interested in her at least partially because she got a boyfriend. Her ability to get a boyfriend means she must have something attractive or appealing about her, either leading you to subconsciously seek it out and/or making you realize that if YOU had her, some other guy might envy YOU, because she now has at least one Boy Seal of Approval.

    Alternatively, you might be confusing jealousy with attraction. With a boyfriend, she is probably not showering you with quite as much affection as before (probably some, but not as much.) You are missing that attention... perhaps not her specifically, but the sense that someone was paying attention to you.

    Plus there's always a little "want what you can't have." My suggestion is to take a little space from her... don't stop hanging out with her all together, but hang out with her less. Hang out with her and her boyfriend, or her in a group.

    As far as "getting over her/finding a girl," start expanding your social circle. Ask yourself what qualities you'd want a girlfriend to have. What similar hobbies. Now, go do those hobbies and keep an eye out for a girl that seems cool that is also doing those hobbies. But DO NOT get in the middle of this relationship. If it's gonna fall apart, let it fall apart on its own accord.

    • Its kind of the opposite, she's shown me more affection than usual, and also with the whole expanding my circle, it's pretty large, but I ain't that attractive, so it will be hard to get a girl I really like. I mean even my friend has tried to set me up, and she just comes up with duds, like this one girl she know in her dorm, nice, but just not what I want

    • All right, think critically about this: is this the type of girlfriend you want? She gets a boyfriend, and then becomes MORE affectionate towards you? Does that seem fair to the boyfriend? If you were that boyfriend, would you appreciate it? Obviously I can't psycho-analyze this girl for multiple reasons, but the whole situations seems very very off....

    • Well she's a bit different, and we are really close, but for example, we went on a school trip together, she rested her head in my lap, with no Boyfriend around, she'll also rub my shoulders and crap while he's around, and it's like "girl stop it, ur boyfriend woudln't like that, and what's weird is her boyfriend has become a goodfriend too and either he doesn't care, or doesn't want to care, which is strange because they are awesome together, and she is very attracted to him and vice versa. I don't know what's up