My boyfriend told me he doesn't like my stomach, and the fact that I squirt. What should I do?

So, my boyfriend recently told me he wished my stomach was smaller. Now, I just overcame depression and an eating disorder last year, which my boyfriend knows about. I also told him about the fact that I squirt, as we were talking about sex. We haven't had it yet. I just really don't know what I should say to him. I'm also not a huge girl, and I just recently started to like my body a lot. I have F cup boobs, a nice Italian butt, some nice thighs and curves, and I'm 5'0". My stomach has a little fat to it, but that's to be expected with a curvy body type. It's just upsetting to hear him talk about my problem areas when I JUST began to love myself. So, what do you guys think I should do? Is it normal for guys to be grossed out by squirting? Should I talk to him about this, or am I overreacting? Thanks.
Updates:
+1 y
When I was talking to him about the squirting, I mentioned we could just lay towels or something down when we had sex. He told me I could just hold my orgasms in. I then told him that if I had to hold mine in, he should have to do it as well. He doesn't see it, and tells me I'm "being dramatic." Am I?
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Most Helpful Girls

  • Yikes. :/ If you haven’t been together for long, I would advise you to leave him because it’s things like that which will destroy your internal dialogue and mess up the health of a relationship. If he felt that way about your stomach, then he should have asked you to start working out with him and cooking you healthy meals, not telling you in a way that dissipates your self-esteem. Because here’s the thing…. if you lose the weight just to make him happy, the bond will feel less authentic like he only enjoys you because you loss the weight. You won’t even be able to appreciate the sense of achievement because it will all be about getting his approval. So insensitive for him to say that too knowing that you’ve seriously struggled with body image. There’s already enough things and people making you doubt yourself; you don’t need it from someone who’s supposed to be your safe haven too. :/

    No offense, I don’t mean to upset you or be rude; but squirting does not turn everyone on. I don’t want you to feel ashamed for it, but there’s this hyper sexualized idea that squirting is some sexual goldmine but really, some people just think it’s messy, dramatic, and extra. :/ Sorry girl, just trying to give some honest insight. Some guys aren’t going to be into being splashed by juices that leave stains on the sheets or even on the walls or furniture and sometimes they may want a chill orgasm, not an over the top one that’s like a porn scene.

    • Thank you for this. I really appreciate the honesty. I mentioned to him we could just use towels and other things when we have sex, but he just told me to hold my orgasms in. I found that quite rude of him, as he's free to cum. I'll just tell him to live with it, and if he can't handle it, I'll find someone else.

    • That is EXTREMELY rude of him. He sounds like he doesn't know how to use tact or at least be even a little bit considerate of your feelings. I get that after an orgasm sometimes you just wanna be lazy, chill out in the bed, and not move instead of having to clean up or go wash off because you got splashed (one reason why I never let guys cum on me) but he didn't have to express it like that. So if you don't mind me asking, is squirting something you can't help but do during every orgasm?

    • @update You're not being dramatic and it's weird that he seems to expect you to be emotionless, perfectly fine, and totally chill with him telling you to sexually satisfy him but not even allow yourself to be sexually satisfied. He seems a bit controlling?

    • Show All
  • Girlfriend...
    It sounds like you're just... built like a WOMAN.

    And as for the squirting... Ffuuuuuuuuu woman. I've wished for my whole damn life that I could do that.
    Every lover I've ever had -- note the word LOVER, as in "someone who LOVES women" -- has absolutely ADORED getting all wet from me, and smelling like me all over... and I can only *imagine* how much more every single one of them would have loved it if I could've squirted, too.
    Every single one.

    Don't waste ANY more time with this boy.

    You deserve... a LOVER. Who makes you feel beautiful.
    And who makes yr whole body feel ohhhh so GOOD.
    ... And ohhhhhh so baaddddddd.
    <3

    __

    "He told me I could just hold my orgasms in"

    ^^ If some boy ever told me this, I'd let him experience a heavy period... from his nose and lips. Then I'd leave his ass.
    Fuck. No.
    Fuck no.

    You deserve a boy who's all about YOUR pleasure. And -- in all seriousness -- you should be selfish as fuck about that.
    A good lover will get off even harder, the more YOU are into YOUR OWN pleasure. Trust me on this one.

  • What kind of boyfriend criticizes your body? I personally wouldn't want to have sex with someone who is saying negative things about my body. I'm sure he's not perfect. So how would he feel if you were commenting on things about his body that you don't like. I'm sure you wouldn't do that though because it's a mean thing to do.

    I can never understand how anyone can think it's okay to comment negatively on another person's body. Especially when that person is supposed to be a boyfriend or girlfriend who is supposed to love and support you.

    I would be questioning the relationship. Because I wouldn't want to be with someone who is going to criticize me like that.

    • Wow, and the update, him asking you to "hold in" your orgasms? Oh no, just walk away from this guy right now. Why is he allowed to have pleasure but your not? How is that fair? I'm sorry, maybe I'm old-fashioned but I believe you either take a partner how they are or don't get with them. No one can make a person change unless they want to. Sounds like your boyfriend is controlling. He doesn't sound very nice. I wouldn't personally continue to see him. Why should you feel bad about normal bodily functions? That seems a bit much to me.

  • My boyfriend told me he doesn't like my stomach, and the fact that I squirt. What should I do?
    In my opinion it's suited to get a new boyfriend that likes your body and your squirting.

    He doesn't see it, and tells me I'm "being dramatic." Am I?
    Going by seeming male 'logic' yes you're being dramatic as I find guys consider it 'dramatic' whenever a gal says/does something he doesn't like. Especially for a gal to insist on treating a dude like he treats her. To me it's just a brushoff complaint they use because I find most dudes have no desire to be treated like how they treat gals.

Most Helpful Guys

  • I know that there are things about a woman's appearance that I don't like and things I do like. I know that on some level it's a bit shallow to think of appearance when I think of a person I want to be with. That being said, I also acknowledge that to try and make a woman change her physical appearance just to make me happy isn't taking her own happiness into consideration. There may be a multitude of positive qualities with the guy your with but if you have to suffer in any way just to stay with him, then you are sacrificing who you are for someone that doesn't understand that your feelings and the person that you are is important. I feel that too many times a woman is caught up in the idea of not being alone, not being single, being with someone because it's what is supposed to be and losing hope that there is someone out there for them, that they settle for less than what they deserve. You have to stand up for who you are. Clearly tell your guy that his ideas on what you look like are not important to you because you know who you are and who you want to be. If he doesn't like the way you look and it's an issue for him, then he is free to find someone that better fits his flavor this month.
    You know that your are beautiful so don't let anyone tell you different and if he can't support you then he is part of the problem.

  • douchebag !! it's a classic technique based on pointing on your flaws and showing your strength points as flows too to lower your self esteem and keep your mind busy to control you, so instead of asking more from him or developing your feelings and relationship or even noticing his flaws you will be busy covering your flaws and doing best to please him and get his approval !!!
    so be careful and take my advice: if you want the best be the best, work on your weight keep your self busy and stop talking about sex with him and make him come after you !

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What Girls & Guys Said

13 19
  • Yes you should. For a start you guys haven't even had sex for him to be commenting on it. And what sort of boyfriend puts a girl down like that?

  • It's okay not to think every single part of your partner is perfect, but if you voice to them that you don't like their body, you're an ass. He knew it would bother you, and said it anyway. Leave!

  • I don't know what is wrong with him... that sounds like an amazing body and squirting is a big bonus. confused...

  • He doesn't deserve you, you should break with him.

  • Tell him you wish his dick was better then dump him for being an ass

  • Given what you've overcome and the general insensitivity of his remarks (who comes right out and says "baby, I wish your stomach was smaller?"), I'd leave him.

    Oh, and keep up the good work on your self esteem! :)

  • Well you never specified your weight, so I don't know

    • I'm about 138lbs, and I'm 5'0". But, most of that does come from my curves.

  • Leave his ass

    • At your update nope you are not be dramatic, its insane of him to think that you should have to hold it in

  • Dump him! You need love yourself no matter what anyone says!

  • Seriously, say "well that's the way I am and if you don't like it, leave" If a guy truly cared about you, even if he didn't particularly care for those things he would never actually tell you that because it's just the way you are and he loves you anyway (learns to love those things about you). Might be time to find a new boyfriend, one that might truly care for you.

  • Dump him, he's an arrogant asshole who doesn't deserve you!

  • sounds like a jerk... you need someone better

  • I wonder why is he with you for?

  • Find a new boyfriend. Seriously, hold it in? Is he fucking nuts? If he doesn't realize squirters are keepers and can't appreciate the gift you bring to the bedroom, then you deserve someone who does.

  • Dump his stupid ass! Srsly

  • fuck that guy.. haha move on to the next one. Anyone that makes you feel uncomfortable in your own skin doesn't deserve your time. good luck :)

  • I don't find anything wrong with u or ur stomach and it is normally that u squirt when u can't control urself... don't feel bad whatever he say to u talk to him about ur stomach and still he feels or talk like that than find another one

  • he's an ass. Dump him.

  • He is a douchbag... and jerk... also he sounds like he is controlling

  • Not overreacting at all, the guys insensitive. Kind of a Dick move honestly.

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