Well, I had skipped this question because it's so vague, but was just asked to respond...
So, it really depends on the situation. On update it would appear she was checking out long before the actual split so it's obvious she was done with it all anyway.
And this whole 'asking out' thing it just too formal. If you want to talk to her and get to know her better just do that. Invite her to coffee, or a drink, or whatever is appropriate as a venue to just be able to communicate. Show your interest by paying attention to her - JUST TALK TO HER.
If you're a man on your mission you have things you are doing, that you have plans for. Tell her about that and tell her she's welcome to join you. For example, "I'll be at ______ (fill in place) on Friday for some pizza and beer, come on out and join me." Or whereever it is that you're gonna be or doing, ask her along. "I'm going to the ___ball game Sunday, want to come along?"
This way if she's at all interested she'll show up, or if she's busy she'll suggest an alternative. If she's not, then she'll just shut you down. At least you'll know. You CANNOT negotiate attraction. It's either there or it isn't.
wait, but make your intentions clear immediately, tell her straight up your there for her through the time but cz you wanna date when she's ready... but bruh don't take too long in that phase be subtle but always remind her of your intentions... I believe if you show her a good time n hang out, you'll get her.
then again nothing is set in stone... don't have too much expectations, anything can happen, in a fucked up way she might go back to the guy... be ready for anything!
If you ask her out now, the chance of her being over her ex is slim. I'd give a guess of less than 4%.
What is likely going to happen is:
1. She's going to want to immediately jump into a relationship. It'll end because she's going to compare you to her ex. You likely won't live up to him. It will end because she'll realize that no matter how bad it was, she's still stuck on him.
2. Rebound. You're going to be the guy who she uses to distract herself from her ex. Go on a few dates, have some fun, and it'll end because she'll either find someone else, go back to the ex, or move on.
3. She might tell you no and say "you're a good friend".
- Give her space. Flirt with her but let her be.
You don't have to go all out and try to immediately start a relationship with her especially since she's just left her ex. But I think you should make your intention to be more than a friend clear. If she's flirting then she may like you to and be open to the idea. Just because she ended it with her ex doesn't mean she needs a certain amount of time to move on as not everyone does tbh. If she thinks it should of ended a long time ago then she could be feeling free to explore. Just make it clear that you don't intend on just being a rebound so want to take time to gradually get serious if that how things naturally progress.
I think you should wait to get really close to her. If you get close enough to her that she will open up to you and tell you how she feels about the situation, then your chances will be better. Even if the relationship wasn't good for her, breakups are still hard. You're losing someone that was a big part of your life for a while. I think it's important for you to be there for her right now and tell her that you care about her and want to eventually have a relationship with her, but that if she isn't ready, that she can take her time.
Opinion
69Opinion
"B" For Best from the Rest to Go Slow, Joe, anyways. Being she has just gotten Out of an Old Relationship, she is Vulnerable Now Somehow.
Be Lite and Semi Sweet with every Tweet. I have seen Many a Time, how these Things go with Some Jill and Joe, Where they Will... Kiss and Make up.
Good Luck. xx
u You will never know when she is recovered from a break up, so how will you know when you have waited long enough? It is better to approach her and say, "I know that you just broke up and you may want some alone time to cool off from the experience and not just jump into a rebound relationship, but when you are ready, I would love to spend some time with you. If you are interested, will you let me know when you are ready?"
GO NOW... maybe if she isn't ready you will make an impact on her and when she is ready.. . give you a shout. If you wait and she doesn't know your intentions well.. YOU MY FRIEND ARE SCREWED.
Take the number of the greatest units of time she was together with him, and then wait for her for a smaller unit of the same number. So if they were together for two months, wait two weeks.
This little fact was taken from a study made straight out of my ass.
I have tried this and it worked for me. Do exactly what you see was missing in her relationship, and the ask her immediately after doing that. But do remember you are currently just a rebound and she will eventually get over you too because your 'novelty value' or your newness will fade and then either she might get back to him, find some other guy, or be single again. One thing to be cautious of is her private conversations with her ex, because no matter what she is saying now, she once had feelings for him and she will listen to him. I found that when we where having a good time, and saw her ex, she would would get a little nervous and that's the key time when you have to act and provide her the comfort and warmth she is craving for.
The other way which I am unaware of is when the girl will get close to you just to make her ex feel jealous. And this might actually frustrate the other guy.
Well, just play it cool still. Ask her out for coffee or like a drink at the pub or something casual still. Then see from that event how she acts around you and if she talks about her ex at all. Then work from there. But from my experience and from observation of women, don't ever think you know exactly what's going on in their brains or assume their feelings on any situation. They may say one thing like I don't care about that guy, I hate him, and then the next thing you know, he says or does something that makes them crawl back. So, go easy and be like you have been with her, it seems to be working with her. And let her decide if she is really over him.
The prudent thing would be to let her process her last relationship before getting together with her, but the common philosophy these days is to get over somebody you need to get under somebody else. Women who typically do this are train wrecks; they don't know who they are, what they want and it's ALWAYS the guys fault.
I was in the same position 2 years ago, and I did the prudent thing and gave her space & time to heal. She ended up jumping on some other guy immediately and just broke up with him a few months ago. She was hot and I did truly enjoy her company but her inability to take inventory after a break up was a huge red flag to me.
Stay close to her but don't jump into anything too soon. If she's still getting adjusted to single life and y'all start things up right away, you'll be a rebound. If she's someone you're good friends with then I would stay in touch and slowly warm up to her. If you move in too quick it could put her off.
Under most circumstances I would say wait, or else you might risk being nothing more than a rebound. However, since it sounds like it was an easy breakup for her and she's already flirting with you, I'd say go for it, but take it slow. Start with casual dates and build up to more romance later on.
It's really not an exact science. Some girls will be open to a new date after little time and others will have to wait longer. Try to pay attention to some signs, try to see if she's open to other guys already. If she is (or if you think that she is), don't wait.
You don't want to be the filler guy. As hot as that sounds, it's not. It's the rebound guy she goes with right after the break up, then realizes what she is doing and how that's wrong for her. Then she moves on to a whole different guy, who she then applies herself in a more emotionally present way.
A shoulder to cry on is a dick to ride on 😂. Dont waste much time just ask her.. Though ur first few months r going to be hell becoz all she is going to talk about is my ex was this my ex was that.. My ex liked this my ex hated that blah blah.. But eventually ull be the one bcoz of whom she will forget everything.. She will start loving u more and more by time..
PS-Do note the things that she didn't like about his ex while she is telling u the story and improvise on it :']
Ask her out. I mean be honest. What are you wanting? If you want to hit it then try. If you want to get together ask her. While talking to her just ask... Hey I know you just split ( this is basic don't copy verbatim) but I'd like to take you to a movie. Don't pressure but you and her could hang out, she can get out freely after her longneeded breakup. And she'd know you like her if she doesn't already. But she may just be happy to be flirty
As long as you are sure it's over and she's let go , I guess the time is right when she's showing signs of interest in you.
I'd just bide your time, get to know her more. Let things develop I'm there own time. Rather than jump right in and rush things
Just be careful you aren't a rebound relationship though, but I'm sure that's not the case considering the relationship was over long ago for her, even though she was still with him.
I would suggest you to wait. I mean, talk to her and tell her that you are interested and that u like her, but that u prefer to give her some time for her to be fully prepared. She might be ready, but most likely she still has feelings for him (perhaps not strong enough). Also waiting might be a good thing for you too. Who knows what's going on in her mind. She may see u as a way to hurt her ex (even if she is the one who broke up) or even as a rebound.
Since your saying that it looks like she moved on already, I would suggest moving in for the kill already, it's a fast passed society, no difference there.
If she looked really hart broken just support her for now until she seems more lively and positive.
Keeping yourself restraint because of what others might think isn't a very good idea. Be you, but be considerate of her feelings.
I don't know how long was her relationship. But considering that she said 'it should have ended long time ago' and that she has been flirting with you she might get over it sooner.
I think you can be honest and let her know that you are into her. Then give her time whenever she is ready. You can directly tell her that you respect if she might need time and that she can tell you whenever she is ready to move on and start new relationship.
This is a hard one to gauge! Because waiting seems like right idea but you have no idea how some people act after a break up. It is rare someone will take time off the dating game to reflect, also a girls goal is to not be the loser after the break up even if it is her fault so a lot of girls have that back up weeny. So I say just swoop in and get it over with
B, she can accept your relationship offer because she is looking for another ship. She is lost in a sea and seeking for another ship. For scientific research's "Peoples can be sad for a broke up for only 28 days but then their hearts will return to the base levels"
She just dumped a guy and you moving in her life can be very tricky because you never want to be the rebound guy. The reason because she might be frustrated and disappointed with her previous relationship so there is a good chance she might accept you but she is doing to get over the dissapointment she had and there are strong chances that she might dump you.
scenario 2
She might just reject you.
My advice find an another girl because you don't want to spend all that effort on this girl.
You can also add your opinion below!
Most Helpful Opinions