Can men and women really be best friends, without ruining the relationship?

Question

According to me YES they can, and YES it does depend on the relationship they have with their partners and how they can handle their best friend of the opposite sex.

Some people say it is wrong because eventually one person will have a crush on the other.

In opposite-sex friendships, we want someone we can have a conversation with, and to feel a connection without worrying about catching feelings or awkward moments.

So Can Men and Women Be Friends or Not? Without causing confusion to their partners... How do you handle if it if your man has a best female friend or vice versa.

deeznutzbby · Accepted Answer

In MY experience, and not to toot my own horn or sound conceited, every guy that I've gotten to be good friends with has developed (or maybe had some from the start) feelings for me. But honestly, the same feelings usually develop from my end too..

It could be my sexuality- I've been told that I have a lot of sexual magnetism, lol. I love it and have had my share so it could be the whole pheromone (the more sex you have, the more sex smelling pheromones you put out, they say) theory but I don't know.

But YEAH I think some men and women can be best friends without any feelings developing, therefore ruining the relationship!

dragonfly6516 · Accepted Answer

Not everyone is capable of it, and no, it can't work if one of you does have feelings for the other. Most often my "BFF" is a dude, because I'm not at all girly, and really don't get along with other girls; I cannot stand that backstabbing, one-upping, mind game bullshit that women are stereo-typically infamous for. I have two female friends, and both are more tomboyish like I am. I have 8 guy friends that I'm always hanging around with. Ironically, the one that I'm closest with is the friend I recently posted was going through a MtF transition within the next 3 years, and he's an ex.

Kayla43 · Accepted Answer

Well.. if you were like me growing up and had more boys in your small town than girls you'd think it's all but impossible. But growing up most of my friends have been boys because of that exact reason. They never even asked me out either. Some admitted to liking me but other than that it's no big deal. Some of us were friends since early childhood, we would never think about sex with each other. They were like my brothers and I was like a sister to them, even though we weren't related our families were THAT close with each other. So yes, it's entirely possible.

rockettothemoon · Accepted Answer

Hmm I say yes in a relationship both can have friends of the opposite sex, BUT, I wouldn't condone them hanging out alone together. I do believe things can get messy that way. Personally in my relationship I don't really believe in having friends of the opposite sex, and if they do then I must know about them. I've experienced too many times where the girl who's my SO's friend suddenly gets more "comfortable" with him after knowing he's in a relationship and it just triggered me, so therefore i prefer us not to have friends of the oppsite sex.

godfatherfan · Accepted Answer

NO, Nope, Never, THis does not happen ladies.
I have been saying it since I got on this site
I will say it forever.
MEN AND WOMEN ARE NOT FRIENDS!!!
assuming both are straight
it is just not possible.
They can be Friendly. For some, it is just about the same thing.
But with the possibility of sex out there, they cannot be friends in the true definition of the word.
and no ladies, saying "I am not interested in him sexually" does not matter.
are you straight? is there a penis and vagina in the equation? then sex can happen...

art84 · Accepted Answer

I think it's possible if both have ground rules that they aren't attractive to each or would ever date each other.

BluesBoy · Answer

Well it is perfectly possible especially if you have been friends with someone at a younger age. I was raised with a girl and it never happens to us to be involved together. We had more like a brother sister relationship.

I do have female friends that I made later.

That being said since I assume I can't interest anyone it might be easier for me to see only friends as I never intend nor expect more when I met someone. That might be odd I guess since one day a female friend I made asked me if I was gay lol.

JustCallMeLeon · Answer

A "friend" is a really strong word that most people fail to understand. A friend is not someone you know, or you hang out with. A friend is someone whol knows everything about you, has been there for you, knows your "evil" and bad side and is ok with it etc. So, no. I dont think I could ever get that close to a girl (or a gay guy) like that, without any sort of sexual desire taking place, even in the back of our heads. I alone know of a few couples that were friends for a long time and now they have kids. Trust me, you re bound to bang your heterosexual "friend" sooner or later.

MrOracle · Answer

It's only possible if neither are attracted to each other (very rare) and are in other relationships. Otherwise, the guy is most likely attracted to her and wants to bang her, and that will affect the relationship sooner or later.

Girls: ask yourself: if you offered sex to your guy "friend", would he accept (let's assume he's single)? If the answer is "yes", then he's NOT your "friend".

ExhaustedMaid101 · Answer

Yea. my best friend has always been a guy. we have been friends since we were in diapers 😶. and yes he had a crush on me and i won't lie I was liking him but I couldn't cross that line with him ever. he's far to important in my life that I could not risk losing him.

LifeIsStrange · Answer

I had guy friends on my college course and I just wanted friendship but each one ended up wanting to date...
it's a shame cause it ruins your friendships!
Even my best guy friend wanted more and I had to say we are just friends.
If I have no physical attraction to them then we can be friends, but if I do then it's just not gonna work. It's so hard to be platonic with any guy and yet I get on with guys so well too 😣

Sevenyoung · Answer

Yes. I have one guy friend who has a girlfriend and I have no feelings for him whatsoever. We're not best friends but we are friends. But it could also be because he's not really my type. I don't like how he back chats to teachers and skip classes sometimes.

ASEXY · Answer

They can be best friends if they both don't find each other attractive and their partner isn't jealous/suspicious about them being friends. I'm asexual/aromantic and I never been best friends with a girl because all my previous friendships with girls never turned into best/close friendships. I don't want to be best friends with girls because in most cases she either liked me, she had a jealous boyfriend, and/or we had absolutely nothing in common. I rather be acquaintances or causal friends with most girls because I'm afraid they would ruin the friendship by saying the worst things about my asexuality and lack of interest. I wouldn't mind being best friends with lesbians, straight guys and asexual/aromantic people.

UnknownXYZ · Answer

They can. If they couldn't, then either you are invisible, family or an agenda to get into opposite sex's pants. The bigger question is why don't people genuinely care about other unless sex is involved?

DarkHumorRUs · Answer

I mean, if one or both of them already have a BF/GF, then yes it's entirely possible.
Otherwise, as long as they are attracted to each other they'll eventually want to be more than friends.
The problem is when only one likes the other, but even still it's possible to remain friends. That's what I've gone through (I told her I like her, we're still friends)

MarriedMale43 · Answer

Yes, absolutely. Though in my teens and early twenties, many of my friendships started out with a crush one direction or another, now most of my closest friendships are female and platonic. Somewhere along the way, you learn not to fan the flames of attraction into full-blown crush.

likitb4istickit · Answer

All of my female friends are friends because they are simply unattractive to me (about the same attractiveness as a guy and I'm not gay). So it depends. If the guy thinks the girl is nice but ugly then sure.

PlacentaSalad · Answer

One of my best friends is a married woman, I don't have a crush on her or anything. But this is probably because she is married and I have the maturity and self-control. If she were single when I had met her, then that'd be another question. She's total wife material and very pretty. It'd be crazy to remain satisfied with just friendship unless that were the only option.

I have other female friends but this is because they aren't any type of dating material.

Sirakyus · Answer

I'm not gonna say it's impossible but 9 times outta 10, I'll say no. Just speaking from my own personal experience, most guys I know and myself included, to a certain extent, become friends with girls we find attractive... I don't think men and women can have a deep relationship without feelings getting involved

HastaLaPasta · Answer

I believe that they can, but my ex cheated on me with one of his friends... so if I get into another relationship I will be aware of it and might be a little more watchful. I personally believe that you should be friends with whomsoever you choose.

BrittBratt2416 · Answer

It's hard to say.. I had guy friends.. sort of and at one point I found myself thinking what it was like to date them. But if both find each other unattractive then I guess it's possible.

Sephora_Addict · Answer

No it can't. If the girl is attracted to the guy and the guy isn't, she'll resent him and vice versa. I was friends with this guy in high school, one day he tells me he loves me, I told him I didn't feel the same and the rest of the year he made fun of me and we stopped talking to each other. Mind you he was with me everyday in high school and I considered him my best friend.

Amy_cw · Answer

I think they can! If they feel no sexual attraction near each other, they can't catch feelings to. At least thats what I think.

Prof_Don · Answer

If either one has a bit of attraction to the other, odds are high that somewhere during the route of the friendship, one will ponder being "more than friends" for the other.

vonasaurus · Answer

i've always been good at separating friendships from romantic relationships, and i have a ton of close guy friends (both gay and straight).

it's definitely possible, but someone usually develops feelings.

Anonymous · Answer

I would only have a guy best friend if he is gay, I wouldn't want a straight one as it might make relationships with guys awkward. I know I wouldn't be comfortable being with a guy who has a girl best friend because he will go running off to her with any relationship issues. it wouldn't be helpful as he probably wouldn't want me to ask guys for advice about the relationship instead of talking to him

Can men and women really be best friends, without ruining the relationship?

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