How to balance time between your family and your boyfriend?

[Anonymous]

I was single for 5 years and always did everything with my family. Every family function I was there. Every birthday party. Family gatherings. Game nights. Sunday brunch. Movie nights. Drinks and dinner. Etc.
Well I've been dating my boyfriend for 9 months and I'm struggling trying to balance time between family and him. And they all get along with him well, but it hard. I have huge family, and he is an only child raised by just his mom. So it's difficult for him sometimes to constantly be around my loud crazy family all the time. He's super close with his mom and I've only been around her 3 times in 9 months. While he's been around my family more times that I remember.
I made plans with my brother tomorrow for the super bowl but at last minute my boyfriends mom invited us to her house for a bbq. I don't want to ditch my brother but I also don't want to always have my way with my family and leave his out.
Anyone been in a situation like this? If so PLEASE throw some advice my way.
thank you

[Megalizmo21]

I think relationships often require a lot of sacrifice. I understand the need to spend time with ones family, and that it's hard to spread yourself out (I come from a family of 13), but think about showing your boyfriend you really value doing what would make him happy (not that you don't).

A suggestion, maybe for future holidays/events you can plan in advance which ones you'll spend with his family.

Because I have so much extended family often I have to choose what events I'm going to go to, and even though it means separating from my family, or even a group I'd prefer to be with, it has its upsides. I know a wider range of people much better and stay connected with them all. In the case of a relationship like you, it's even more important to show that you're willing to invest time in his family's life.

[coolbreeze]

Go to both parties. Go to his mom's for a little then go to your brother's party Balance is key. And it's hard to balance things out with limited time. But just do the best you can to make it work out.

[Anonymous]

make plan