Is it normal for my boyfriend to curse and degrade me whenever he gets angry about anything?

It's not possible to confront him about anything (no matter how small the issue is) without him threatening to harm himself. He'll curse at me and degrade me, in public and in private. We've been together for nearly two years now. In the beginning he was great to me, that didn't last longer than a month though. I didn't know at the time but he was still flirting with other girls, including his exes. When I try to talk to him about anything that bothers me he starts getting nasty with me. He puts me down and really treats me like garbage. I fell for him in the beginning because he seemed so genuine and sweet, now I'm wondering if his behavior is all sub-consciously pointing to the end of our 'relationship.' He was the first guy I ever really let get close, whereas he has been in a handful of relationships (the majority of which ended because he either cheated on the girls or they cheated on him). He says he wants to marry me and have a family someday. He blames his bad ways on feeling depressed. He also lies a lot, even about the pettiest things. I don't know what to do at this point. I don't feel like I have any say anymore, I don't want him to commit suicide, I love him; he just doesn't respect me. I feel as if I'm the only one in the relationship the gives a damn. What do I do?

I wouldn't be able to live with the guilt of him committing suicide, he's attempted it in the friends see our relationship as a misery loves company situation. I'm blindly optimistic and fear I'd be throwing away something fixable=/


Most Helpful Girl

  • Honestly girl, I say get out of there. if he is saying that he will harm himself and commit suicide,tell him you will tell someone. and if he truly loves you he wouldn't put you through that and that suicide is a selfish thing. one of my counselors told me that majority of people who say they are going to commit suicide,dont actually do it. they know that you care for them so much, and it is there way of making you do things or hurting you. also,it still needs to be taken seriously if he has attempted before. I also say get out of there,because it is a mentally abusive relationship. he uses what he knows hurts you to get what he wants and make him be the victim. this is not a good relationship to be in it can leave permanent damage to your mental preference. it may be hard, but after two years I think you should break it off because it doesn't matter how long you've already dealt with this, you can't deal with it any longer let alone the rest of your life.

    good luck to you:]

    • Report

      Thanks hun, I appreciate the advice. I suppose I should try to ease him out of the relationship by 'taking a break' maybe after some time passes he'll grow accustomed to not having me around...

    • Report

      Yeah that would be a safer way:]