It seems in the last year, while I've been single, I am crushing big time on ONLY women with boyfriends. Why am I doing that? Why can't I find a nice single girl to date? Is it something I'm doing? Are these women finding me a good "man friend" where their boyfriends lack? Two of which, by the way are work mates of mine. I am crushing on the girlfriends in social settings. I have never acted upon them because I'm not a jerk, but living this way has been torturous. Help me! What can I do?
Most Helpful Girl
I think you're being duped by your emotions. You know another man has found the woman attractive, desirable to be with etc and that makes her more attractive to you.
The "safe" thing is another emotional trick but I think you feel safe with her because she's already been "pre approved" by her boyfriend.
Interesting that you work with two of these girls. Could it be that you don't do your own "research" and find a single girl that may suit you? I know it requires time and some emotional risk but you'll feel better about yourself don't you think?
Could this be a confidence issue with you?
Just realize that most crushes (whether the lady is taken or not) are based on an idea of what that person would be like and not who they actually are since it's impossible to really know them well without actually being in a relationship with them and taking some time to see how they handle various circumstances/situations.
I hope you figure this out soon and get to enjoy a woman of your own soon. I think it would help you quickly forget the others.