How should you deal with a heartless boyfriend?

[Anonymous]

I've been with my boyfriend for over a year now. He never seems to care about anything else but money and himself. He says he loves and cares for me, but I just don't feel it. He believes money can buy love. But it's that 'feeling' I want. I confronted him several times about this already, and most of the time he blames me for not understanding him. It's his wrong doing, why should I comfort him and apologize for speaking up my thoughts and feelings? I've been really hurt because of him, and yet he never seems to care or change.. What should I do? Will this kind of people ever change?

[Bond-007]

Multiply the year you have been dating him by 30.

Ask yourself if he is really the man you want to spend the rest of your life, possibly raise children, & grow old with. The reason you don't feel it is because your womanly intuition is telling you that his words are empty.

If he says "I will change", "I can change"...these are empty words.

We must not believe people's words, so much as their actions.

For a person to want to change they need a reason to. The new pattern of behavior needs to be more fulfilling than the old one. Selfish people generally don't change. Why should they, it's all about them anyway...that's the mentality they have. Normally it takes pain to make people realize that their current patern of behavior is unfulfilling. The only way to make tha pain go away is to create change.

What is your father like? Is your boyfriend's behavior similar to your fathers? I've seen this before, where we subconsciously look for the love & acceptance we never got from either of our parents, in a relationship. Unfortunately if a woman had an abusive father (physically, mentaly, emotionaly) this is what she will be drawn to, & she will accept this type of treatment because it's what she witnessed as a child.

He's selfish, & he will not change. As you said "he cares about $ & himself".

Breakup with him, it will only get worst.

After a year, you should be happy not unhappy.

Hope this helps.

[Anonymous]

You just said a lot without really explaining much. I didn't really get a clear picture from reading that. Could you give examples?

For instance, you said that he believes that money can buy love. Why do you think that? What makes you think he only cares about money and himself? The "feeling" thing is on your end. Sure, it could be that you're not feeling the love because it's not there. It's just that if you want good answers, it would probably help if you told a little more of the story.

[desidoll]

You don't have to apologize to him tho because its not your fault at all.If you told him about this many times and yet he isn't change.I don't think you should stay with him.He probably won't change.As you said heartless person.They won't care about what we feel.Leave him.

[Louran]

He might not change because my boyfriend too is same like yours. I tried so many times to talk to him I only see the change in one day

[AltTech]

If you are unhappy, then leave the relationship, it won't get any better. He won't ever change unless he wants to. And if you are the one prodding him, any changes that do happen won't be genuine and certainly won't be permanent.

[ImALuvrNotAFighter]

You shouldn't expect to change him; this kind of behavior typically doesn't improve with time. You don't seem to think much of this guy; why are you still with him? Life is too short to spend it with someone who makes you miserable.

[WoIIie]

Demand change. If he won't listen, break up with him.

Just a heads up... he's probably not going to listen.

[angad_12]

don;t deal with hearltess boyfriend instead leave him and find someone else.

i know its going to be tough but certain decisions are taken for best interest of both people in the relationships

[pr3ttybr0wn]

u could always leave...