Girlfriend slapped me hard in the face during an argument, what should I do?

I'm normally very forgiving but I feel I should draw the line at physical violence, "If they hit you once, they WILL hit you again, right?"

Do I break up? Slap back? Or should I just let it go?


Most Helpful Girl

  • TheDigitalSaint is right.

    NO ONE and I mean NO ONE will ever put their hands on me in a relationship and get away with it. It is completely unacceptable. She inflicted physical harm on you. Not unless you purposely hit her or did something to hurt her physically should she feel the need to heat you.

    Break up with her she clearly has issues if she feels the only way to get her point across is to smack you across the face. We don't live in the wild we're humans and as such we should behave like one. Not like a wild animal.

    • right but I'm not really sure what we're supposed to be doing

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    • I'm sure they'll let you go scott free with just a warning.

    • slapping means I'll be going to jail? AHAHAHAAHA! ! ! stop making a fool of yourself. it's really embarrassing.

      of course I can use "the heat of the moment excuse". everyone with a brain knows something like harmless slapping is forgivable. no, I haven't been brought up around a violent family. I know the difference between abuse/violence and mistakes that occur in the heat of the moment. insulting sb. is far worse yet people tend to forgive people who insult them in the heat of the moment.

What Girls Said 12

  • Break up. There is NEVER an excuse for laying a hand on the one you "love". Get out before you get even more hurt... physically AND emotionally.

    • she doesn't love me right?

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    • @carinabina820: hitting someone for verbally abusing you is NOT self defence

    • I agree with tohrment's comment. That is NOT self defense. Self defense is when someone comes at you and tries to like stab you or hit you even, but when they are simply verbally abusing you... those are just words. Be the bigger person and walk away.

  • Leave her!. You don't to be with somone who's going to be beating on you. Even in the case if you try to fight back its only going to look bad on you! best advise is to just walk away and be with somone who actually deserves you.

  • Why did she slap you? like you didn't tell us what happened and what led to this slap

  • Do NOT hit her back. You are much larger and stronger than she will ever be physiologically speaking men's muscles are designed that way. You need to tell her that hitting you was not OK and ask her to be mindful and not do it in the future.

    I say this because taking legal action is not a good way to go for one slap. I should know, I have a year of court-ordered therapy, $19,000 in legal bills, a public record, and got expelled from college for one slap. Don't ruin her life over one mistake, but do let her know that if it happens again (which it should not, you will consider it abusive and leave).

    • He's actually not from usa, and mostly like in cyprus they don't treat it that big.

      Just saying. :s

    • O didn't pay that close of attention...

  • What was the argument about?

  • NEVER hit back it's not right just walk away let both of you cool down and then talk about it

  • Leave her! Please! You do not deserve that at all, I don't care how caught up you two were in the heat of the moment, physical violence is never okay, and trust me the mature good women would never do that. At the very least do not let it go because she very well may do it again and it can get worse, and please do not hit her back it will only make things worse. I am sorry this happened to you, all the best

  • Better question, what did you do to cause this? Did you murder her sister? Run over her cat?

  • Dump her.

    Chances are, she might not ever go to the extreme of battering you, but physical violence is physical violence. It's also a good sign that she'll lose her temper as use her words as weapons much more commonly. People who can't control their temper often tear others down with cruel words that are not easily forgotten.

    Also, I've seen several guys slap their girlfriend back without it being hard enough to harm her and nobody calls the cops, etc. BUT ... these couples end up splitting up anyway because the temper control problem gets too much to handle.

    At the very least, sit her down for a serious conversation about how she violated you and you are not going to tolerate her losing her temper like that. Then, have her work out a solid plan for how she plans to contain it, with the expectations that if she doesn't make progress, you're gone.

  • Do NOT let it go. Do NOT slap her back. Break up if you feel you have to. At the very least, seriously sit down with her and explain how she can't do that. You can't defend yourself without you getting in trouble, it's just as bad as a guy hitting a girl, since you are defenceless. Possibly even worse since a girl can hit a guy back and no bats an eye but if a guy hits a girl back he is considered abusive and can be charged. It's not fair and hopefully one day it will change.

    If she doesn't take you seriously, she will definitely hit you again so dump her.

  • Violence is never the answer, and slapping for whatever reason is unacceptable.

    (1) Don't slap back, whatever you are feeling.

    (2) I'm assuming that she didn't just wake up one morning, head on over and slap you. There must have been some reason that she thinks she was justified in doing this.

    There's very little advice to offer here. These things are never cut and dry and are never easy to sort through.

    If you love her, have a serious chat with her and be firm about the ground rules -- NO HITTING or tantrums allowed, from either of you.

    If you are afraid of her reaction, just tell her that you found her behavior unacceptable and are obligated to end the relationship.


What Guys Said 16

  • Break up immediately.

    Any violence by any human being to another is totally, 100% unacceptable.

    I'm going to give you all the reasons why you're going to break up with this girl:

    - It shows an extreme lack of self-control, something that can not survive a stable relationship

    - Next time she could use a weapon

    - If you're hit again, you could attack back

    - If you attack back, you will go to jail, as domestic violence cases are weighted heavily against men and violence against men is not taken seriously by the police or courts

    - You should never suffer the insult to your integrity as a person to allow yourself such an act

    - You're missing out on being in a stable relationship, free from violence or the fear of violence

    For all the reasons above, you are dumping her on the curb, right now.

    As in, literally, right now.

    • lol holy sh*t, you're overreacting... it's just a slap. ever heard of "acting in the heat of the moment"? if every guy broke up with his girlfriend just because she slapped him, almost everyone would be single. you act like she beat him with a bat.

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    • of course it's not normal, but that doesn't mean a harmless slap is the end of the world. girls tend to be very emotional. they don't have much control over what mistakes occur in the heat of the moment. he hurt her feelings. she couldn't deal with it in a mature way and that's why she felt the need to slap him. it's not abuse... she doesn't beat him on a regular basis/for fun. she made a mistake (millions of women have made the same mistake). if she apologizes to him, he should forgive her.

    • Girls can be emotional, no argument from me here. That's why they need to learn to walk away when a fight escalates. If they don't, the man certainly should until they've calmed down.

      The slap isn't what I'm so much concerned about, but rather what it often leads to. I have multiple friends in law enforcement. "Harmless" slaps are often what escalates to much more serious violence instigated often times by the women, and ramped up even more by the men. Both parties lose.There's no place for it.

  • If I was in your situation, I would look at her and tell her with serious eye contact:

    "Don't ever hit me again. Now get the f*ck away from me."

    And you leave her for a while. Don't give her any attention until she apologizes for it, and means it. Until she comes clean and admits her mistake, go talk to other girls.

  • I don't understamd why some people are asking "why" she slapped him or "what did he do to deserve the slap".In my books that is irrelevant. Violence is violence. She may or may not have meant to cause harm but the thought and an act of physical violence should never be tolerated in a relationship. Surely you should have enough respect for your partner to not hit them, but to rather talk it out like civilised people.Had this been the other way people would be baying for jail time. I've seen it plenty of times. A guy getting so pissed off at his partner and giving her a slap in the heat of the moment. the cops are come to arrest him and he is forever known as a woman beater. Now a girl does the same to a guy and therefore she must have a justifiable reason to do what she did. I call BS.

    Manindark you should seriously think about your relationship and the path it will be going after this incident

  • Being physical is never good, plus she never even apologized. Leaving her would be a better move.

  • I don't know what exactly you should do. I don't know enough about ither of you. But I can say that you should never hit you significant other. I have spent way too much time visiting my mom in the hospital and my dad in jail.

  • Has she apologized since? If she did, did it seem genuine? If she really, seems sorry, it might be worth it to give her a chance. Women can be very emotional at times.

    Don't hit her back. We men are automatically guilty in society's eyes. Society has given women the impression that it is OK to use us men as their punching bags.

    Unless she escalates the situation, where you are at risk for serious bodily injury, it would be wise to stay on the defense.

    I would file a police report for this incident, to keep a paper trail of her behavior.

    If you stay with her, leave if she does this again. Until then, I would invest in a can of pepper spray. It will make her stop fighting without leaving bruises or breaking bones.

    I wouldn't blame you for leaving though. She obviously has problems.

  • Should have slapped her back.

  • if you will slap back it maybe correct because even she slapped you but the society will blame you the guilty...this is the tyme to make her feel ashamed you shld ignore her dnt answer her msgs and all neither tell her your breakin up

  • We can't give an correct answer if you won't give a correct description of what happened!

  • Pimp slap her

  • Never hit her back man. Even if she starts it.

  • leave her . end it with her !

  • tell her to apologize. if she doesn't admit her mistakes/doesn't apologize to you, break up with her. girls are very emotional. maybe you provoked her/hurt her feelings --> she acted in the heat of the moment. it doesn't mean she doesn't love you. seriously, people on her are overly sensitive. it's just a slap.

  • Dump her. Abuse man or woman is not okay. She would have to do some serious I am sorry to get you back...

  • I'd suggest not slapping back. Breaking up sounds like a good idea. At the very least, start chatting up other girls and getting numbers so you'll be ready to go when you need to be.

  • leave her.