OK, so my boyfriend and I have been together 5 years.
We went out with friends on Saturday night and we both ended up in a drunken state. The pair of us was arguing with bouncers and I ended up KO'd on the floor when the bouncer pushed me away from the entrance. They barred me for jumping over the railings to a smoking area; I didn't even see the gate at the time to be honest. I don't know why we decided to argue the point with the bouncers, we were about to leave!
When I came round I put the blame on my boyfriend and humiliated him in front of friends.
My boyfriend and I left and went to my house and he called me all the nastiest things you can think of and started breaking things he made at work for me (he’s a joiner) because he thought I’d hid his house keys. I hid in the bedroom as I knew he was angry and didn’t want to make the situation any worse considering I was the reason for his anger. He found his keys and left, I have not seen him since and he won’t answer any of my calls.
I know I have messed up and seriously hurt his pride. I completely take responsibility for my actions; being drunk isn’t an excuse. I fear I have ruined everything on one drunken night out. Other than this, we have worked very hard on our relationship and we have been happy.
It's not a regular occurrence for me to behave like this, if fact I’ve never humiliated him in this way before. But I should mention that when we first we first got together I had a binge drinking problem, we broke up and I didn't see him for over a year. Looking back I don't blame him. I grew up, got help and changed my life. Maybe my actions on Saturday have hit a nerve and sent him back to square one with me?
I text him yesterday asking him to answer his phone, told him I hated the way things were and that I missed him. He text back telling me that I am messed up; he can’t handle it and doesn’t deserve it. I responded by saying is this really the end for us? He didn’t reply and he hasn’t changed Facebook status to single.
I haven’t yet apologized, I don’t think doing it by text is appropriate, it will just end up misconstrued. I want to apologize to his face or at least on the phone so he knows I am sincere and regret my actions. Unfortunately right now he won’t answer his phone and I don’t think turning up unannounced will go down well, it will probably make him angrier. But I am also worried that my lack of apology might ruin any chance of reconciliation.
Is he just angry? Do I give him time and space? Would you forgive me? Do I just apologize via text? Call it quits?
Any advice would be hugely appreciated, apologies for the essay.
Thank you.
We went out with friends on Saturday night and we both ended up in a drunken state. The pair of us was arguing with bouncers and I ended up KO'd on the floor when the bouncer pushed me away from the entrance. They barred me for jumping over the railings to a smoking area; I didn't even see the gate at the time to be honest. I don't know why we decided to argue the point with the bouncers, we were about to leave!
When I came round I put the blame on my boyfriend and humiliated him in front of friends.
My boyfriend and I left and went to my house and he called me all the nastiest things you can think of and started breaking things he made at work for me (he’s a joiner) because he thought I’d hid his house keys. I hid in the bedroom as I knew he was angry and didn’t want to make the situation any worse considering I was the reason for his anger. He found his keys and left, I have not seen him since and he won’t answer any of my calls.
I know I have messed up and seriously hurt his pride. I completely take responsibility for my actions; being drunk isn’t an excuse. I fear I have ruined everything on one drunken night out. Other than this, we have worked very hard on our relationship and we have been happy.
It's not a regular occurrence for me to behave like this, if fact I’ve never humiliated him in this way before. But I should mention that when we first we first got together I had a binge drinking problem, we broke up and I didn't see him for over a year. Looking back I don't blame him. I grew up, got help and changed my life. Maybe my actions on Saturday have hit a nerve and sent him back to square one with me?
I text him yesterday asking him to answer his phone, told him I hated the way things were and that I missed him. He text back telling me that I am messed up; he can’t handle it and doesn’t deserve it. I responded by saying is this really the end for us? He didn’t reply and he hasn’t changed Facebook status to single.
I haven’t yet apologized, I don’t think doing it by text is appropriate, it will just end up misconstrued. I want to apologize to his face or at least on the phone so he knows I am sincere and regret my actions. Unfortunately right now he won’t answer his phone and I don’t think turning up unannounced will go down well, it will probably make him angrier. But I am also worried that my lack of apology might ruin any chance of reconciliation.
Is he just angry? Do I give him time and space? Would you forgive me? Do I just apologize via text? Call it quits?
Any advice would be hugely appreciated, apologies for the essay.
Thank you.
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