• Ask
  • myTake

When is the right time to start a family?

Nowadays many couples are starting families before marriage or even later in marriage. There are many couple who are starting families even in their... Show More

Most Helpful Opinion

  • I am 27 and I wasn't ready to start a family until about this time last year. I knew before then that I just wasn't ready for that kind of responsibility. Now that I older and married, I'm so ready to have some little ones. I kinda feel like I'm ready for the next step after the whole single and partying stage, if you get what I'm saying.

What Guys Said 16

  • IMO, the primary reason to get married is to have kids, and I think it's a bad idea to have them if you aren't married, because otherwise there are a lot of benefits and legal issues that will be immensely more difficult. And if you aren't committed enough to get married, then IMO you aren't NEARLY committed enough to bring new life into the world, because that is an even higher level of responsibility.

    • Replace "marriage" with "committed monogamous relationship" and I agree with you. Civil unions should have the same rights as marriage. Technically it's a violation of the first amendment that aren't treated the same.

    • Best answer.

  • Never! Humanity is a plague and ought to perish.

  • I think mid to late twenties would be a good time for me. I don't really know, though. I think it varies from person to person but I never think that sixteen is a good age to start a family.

  • Ideally, after you have achieved some semblance of relationship and financial stability. Marriage is irrelevant, half of them end. The age is really secondary, but obviously from a biological standpoint women need to start before 40 in most cases and it's safest for them from 19-35. For me it's late 20's to early 30's. Definitely not ready for that right now.

  • I'll have kids when I'm married and financially secure and prepared to raise a child. There's no point to start a family and struggle.

  • Well... I think after a wedding is probably the most important part. As for the age thing it is not the same for everyone, not to early not to late, maturity plays a large role And... look at it from a financial point of view, figure out if you can afford to have kids. there are a lot of people struggling in this world because they could not and still do not have a salary that will support and make for a prosperous life for them and their families.

  • Apparently during high school

  • I think it should occur when the couple is stable financially and in their everyday life. Too many couples are starting families with no means to even support themselves. but that's my opinion. I think I could start a family at earliest between 25-27

  • I would say that whenever they are both physically and phycologically mature enough to have children in order to ensure that the child has a decent life and in order for this to happen I would say that early thirties would be ideal. I personally would say that it would be alright for anyone who is 20 or 21 to get married after a few good years of dating but they should just try to enjoy each other and hold off the kids until they are in their early thrities so the child can have the best life that he or she can have by not having parents who are struggling financialy or career wise or be to tried to play with him or her in early childhood. If kids happen younger than they do but I think that you shouldn't plan on them until you are both at least 30-33.

    I know that 20 is a bit young for marriage but if they where abstinant as teens for their own personal convictions then I think that it's alright.

  • When they are fully ready to take on the responsibilities of having a kid and know of all the financial requirements.

    I wish people had to take a test in order to have a kid lol jk

  • i'd say mid 20's.

    don't wanna be too old to keep up with your kids when they're teens.

  • There are a lot of factors to consider, and no calculation is concrete from one person to the next. Marriage is the most unstable thing in American Culture. Why, we devour our self in individualism. Not a bad thing, it just frays the ability to devote one's self to someone for life. Which is exactly marriage is.

    For Richer or Poorer

    In Sickness and Health

    For all that they are

    The Good and the Bad

    Till Death or Beyond (depending on belief)

    To marry someone is to completely acknowledge and accept them. You know you love someone, when you don't view yourself as the most important person in your view of the world. When your ready and willing to protect them, be selfless, stand with them, cherish them, imagine the future with them.

    Its normal to make your world all about you. But until your both ready to make (AND FEEL) your world all about the other person, then your not ready to get married.

    And never, ever, ever get MARRIED just because you think you should. Otherwise your dooming yourself to, later on (some sooner then others), feel trapped. Most people panic, and make bad choices when they feel trapped. Leading them into all kinds of regrettable events.

  • I say whenever it feels right. It's not a matter of reproduction for me; it's a matter of if I have the right state of mind and the right partner. If those two ifs are never fulfilled then I probably won't create children plus there are already too many children in this world who lack familes. So if I really want to continue my legacy, I would adopt.

  • Whenever you're ready?

  • If you want a lasting marriage, it will be after marriage. Statistics show you're more likely to break up from cohabitation. If you both wait to have sex after marriage, then statistics are even better. Divorce rates of families who do natural family planning is at a 1-4% rate I believe. Do not base it around general consensus or popularity, relativism is a corrupt unstable ideology. Once you're married, I suggest waiting until you're financially stable to support said child/children. Other than that, time does not really matter.

What Girls Said 30

  • I really do think that this is a subjective matter. What works for one perons may not work for another. I think that a couple should do what is best for them. But I also think it's alright if a person elects to be a single parent (I suppose this would apply more to women since man can't physically have children).

  • Its different for everyone. I would say anywhere from mid-twenties to mid-thirties is the best, but many great parents have kids much earlier or much later in life.

  • high school and then drop out.

  • Mid twenties. I had my

    daughter at 23 and to me,thats too young.

    But,thats just my opinion.

  • I voted D and I feel that when a couple feels its right is best. I also think that everyone is different... a majority could be like their age group but that isn't necessarily true for everyone. So that's why I don't think a specific age group is really right. However I think mid twenties to thirties the people would probably be more "stable" so to speak.

    I think its when two responsible people, who have considered everything that comes with a child, and are financially stable should be able to start one if they want to.

  • I would go for C. I'd like to be fully ready and have lived my life before having kids.

  • Whenever you're married, and ready to settle.

    • I'm not saying teenager marriage though, because that won't last. And, A couple should wait a couple of years into marriage before producing together.

  • D. When you can provide for the child and are prepared to sacrifice everything for the child and realize life as you know it is going to change. Age has very little to do with maturity and actually the best time for a woman(health wise) to have a child is 16 due to the fact the health and stability of her eggs deteriorates with age. Married-not married I don't care.

    I'm 30, financially secure, in a long term relationship but I don't want kids because I like my life the way it is.

  • I picked D. To me there's no prerequisite of needing to be married, a certain age, or being in a heterosexual relationship to be good parents and have a loving family. It's a serious decision that should be given a lot of time, and thought between the couple, but overall it's when both partners are mentally ready and mature for that responsibility.


    Good God this world is going down the sh*tter...thank goodness all the others have waaay more votes!

    For the record, I chose B! =)

  • I say whenever it feels right because if you truly feel committed to a person than that's true love. True love is committment. When you both have committment for each other marriage is the right choice.

  • i chose C. only becasue I feel that's the right time for, becasue I will be done with school and more stable

  • Stable work and payment, plus I'm graduated and independent.

  • I felt D should have won overall, because everyone is at different stages in their lives its not just ONE perfect time to start a family for everyone. Maybe for some its 20s and others its 40s. Its really no perfect age in my opinion.

  • Love and children do not need to be part of the same equation. You can love someone and be with them and only them for the rest of your life. Someone should not have a child until they are BOTH financially secure and emotionally ready. They should not have any qualms about whether they want to be with each other for the remainder of their child's life.

    Marriage is not necessary, but it might help with bills, and finances.

    I would aslo say 20 is far to young to have a child, you don't have the life experience nor the ability to hold yourself stable at 20. 30-35 is probably a good age where all of these things can be aquired. 50 being the max, because you would still want to run and play with your children.

  • i wanna have kids when I'm around 26/27

  • everyone is different, some woman find they want babies as soon as they find the man of their dreams and others wait until it kind of just happens, and I do believe that there are people in this world that just aren't going to reproduce and that's cool too lol to each is own

  • 25 and up

  • I chose A wrongly :/

    When is the right time to start a family? When you are ready for it after 5 years or so of marriage, having children before marriage is just a very bad idea and having children after one month of marriage is a big mistake also, your marriage may not work.

  • i wouldn't mind having a kid at 24, but I'd rather I be 28-30. I kinda just wanna live my life out first. Also, depends how old the guy I'm with is.

  • When you are ready, and by that I mean when you both are mature and financially stable, emotionally stable, and are together. Yes, she said it! TOGETHER! Children deserve to have 2 parents. You may not have had 2, that's fine & dandy, but there were times you probably wanted, needed 2. Give your children the best start in life that you can.

    It is hard enough to raise children under the best circumstances, let alone when you all have problems. Like no job, no money, no place to live, no partner, etc. Too young, you are not ready yet, too old & you'll be in the nursing home when they graduate college. Plan it out, for goodness sake.

    People plan out what they are doing for prom longer than when & how they are going to have a baby. So, think of others, think of your baby. Plan it out.

  • no set age. some people are ready for kids earlier/later than others

  • there really never is a right time or perfect time. but when it happens everything will be okay you will figure it out and things will fall into place

  • I picked 30 and up but I would have to say late twenties to mid thirties to early thirties... or really whenever is best for you. I want (if I do have kids, if I do good, if I don't whatever) to be settled down and have things running properly. I don't want to be in college or just married. I want to enjoy life because once you have kids a lot of things change, it not just about you anymore. I don't want kids if my life is to hectic to begin with. Their should be stability where you know you can raise that child in a healthy household and give them the things they need. Financially and emotionally, it's not just about having the money because a lot of kids are raised with all the money and more and turn out more screwed up then a poor person. It's not just about love, they need proper care too. SO many things come into play when it comes to raising a family and not everyone's life is going to be fit for that, no family is perfect. You start a family when you are stable and ready.

    but who can say when the right time is?

  • After a wedding. And I said mid-twenty's, but only because I don't wanna get married till then. If your married and finacially stable then anytime is fine.

  • I used to have a plan that by the time I was 25 I would be married with a child on the way. Seeing as that has not happened I am not really sure there is a better time to have a child then another. I would say whenever, if ever you are blessed enough to have a child it will be the perfect time for you to have a child.

  • 30 and up because you've lived and enjoyed life with your partner a little longer. Once kids come along then they become your life for the next 18 years at least. I'd be 48 and to me that is still young so it's no biggie.

  • For me, my ideal time is in my mid twenties. I hope to get married a year or two after I get out of college (so when I am 22, 23, or 24). Then I want to have 2 or 3 years to spend with just my husband and I, and by the time I am around 27 I would like to have my first child. I want to have 2 chidlren, and I figure I can have my 2nd one when I am 30 or somewhere in my very early 30s. that way they will be far enough apart in age. I know this is very precise and it probably won't work out like this at all, but that is my ideal situation.

  • I 'll never have kids before marriage or even sleep with a guy , I personally will never get married or date any pig or sleep with one.

    I discovered that I am a lesbo, I like girls and I won't marry one either.

  • its different for everyone, depends on what you want. I'm not having a family until my mid-late 30s. I don't need to be married to be honest. in any case, I want to accomplish my goals, travel, experience life and build a career first. older moms have the advantage when it comes to that and I read they tend to be more calm about it and more ready psychologically. either way, its the right path for me. I'm already 22, I couldn't image having a family in my 20s.

Have an opinion?