How do I know if he is serious about marrying me?

My boyfriend and I are in college, I'm 19 and he's 21. We have been on and off again for about 6 months, including the little bits of time when we were broken up. At around two months, he admitted that he wanted to spend the rest of his life with me, but he said it in a very casual way, kind of like "oh who knows what will happen?" But over the next months, he mentioned that he couldn't see himself spending his life with anyone else, he was more in love with me than he ever was before, and a lot of stuff about us being together in the future. He was looking for a new apartment to live in when he graduates and he asked me which ones I liked the best because he wants me to live with him. He doesn't talk about marriage all the time, but he's made it very clear that he wants to marry me. (Although we're not officially engaged at all) do I know if this is something he really believes? I definitely believe that I want to marry him but I know we're young and I just want to make sure that it's for real. I have never met a guy who talks about the future as much as he does, and it seems do I tell?


Most Helpful Girl

  • I would say that you don't need to take this seriously at the moment. It sounds like he is really in to you and it is good that he said it but it is way to early in the relationship to be getting serious about that.

    You said that you have been on and off for six months, that does not make the relationship sound serious. The other thing is you are still young and in college. You are going to want different things in the future and nothing is serious in college. You need to concentrate on having fun, concentrate on your college work and let nature take its course. If you are meant to be then things will work out but don't put any pressure on it or take things to seriously at the moment.


What Guys Said 1

  • Even speaking about it in a casual tone is a huge step for a guy. He sounds like he is really into you, but like everyone else he is not 100 percent completely positive about the future just about 95 percent. Focus on what he is saying and that is he wants you to be a part of his future when he is not saying that stuff is when you should be worried.


What Girls Said 3

  • I wouldn't even be thinking about that right now no matter how much he mentions it. It's only been six months and you have a while. Don't get carried away so quickly. I think it's an idea he likes but it is not something that is that definite right now.

    • Good point, that makes sense!

  • Don't worrry, I am in a similar situation. My boyfriend and I have been together for about a year and before that we were best friends. We are both just starting college and just before he left, he told me that he wanted to marry me once we were both done with school. I do really love him and I believe he is the one I do want to marry. The thing is though, nothing is set in stone, who knows if you guys will still be together once you are done with school. Or even if things will work out when you guys live together.

    He does know where he wants to be in life though and I know that if he is anything like my boyfriend, he will do anything to go after what he wants. No matter how simple or difficult the task at hand is, he is always determined to get it if he believes strongly enough. And for him, he wants to get married, settle down, and have a family.

    I wish you the best of luck.