Do you tend to butt heads with your boyfriend/girlfriend or someone you like?

[Anonymous]

I was just wondering do you tend to argue with your boyfriend or girlfriend or with the person you like? Is an all the time thing over the smallest things that an argument starts or what casues it? This girl I like we butt heads all the time and its mainly her that starts the argument and I just don't get it why she does that. I don't know if she is just starting a fight with me because she likes me and that's her way of showing it or idk.

[Anonymous]

use to do that to my ex. I'd expressed my dislike about something he did which was small. But when he fired back at me and got mouthy is when I got pissed and turns my dislike into anger and I start cussing. He don't like that and cusses back at me and I wound up getting called a b***h alot. And it ended up in an argurement, name calling and cussing.

In the beginning everything was cool until our relationship hit a bump in the road and from there on anything and everything set me off. It was from a lack of trust. But why she does it could be for different reasons like being pissy, goofing around or she's just immature. Women will admit to being a b***h but hate being called a b***h. Being called that will make her more mad. If she's getting pissy over small things don't feed into her anger. Tell her something like,"I can tell your mad and I'd like to sit down and talk about it when your ready too" That way it gives her some space and time to cool down and when she does she'll realize what you said and want to talk on a calm level.

[valentine8]

I think it depends on how she acts while you're arguing. For the most part, guys mean what they say and say what they mean. Girls are different. For the most part, it's how a girl says something that shows it's true meaning. Would you describe her as being playful or upset?

Is she getting agitated- grinding her teeth, crossing her arms, tapping her foot in impatience? Is she raising her voice to the point where she sounds uncomfortable?

OR does she seem calm and political about what she says? Does she smirk at you? Is she smiling through her arguing?

Pay attention to her body language while you are "arguing". She may just be decisive, confident, and opinionated.

[Asker]

I haven't seen her in person in a long time. We either argue on the phone or online. She Is def upset and all pissed off. I do something good and be the better person and she gets mad. She def raises her voice and always have to have the last word. always.

[valentine8]

Meh... that doesn't sound very healthy to me. If she's irritated by just that kind of conversation, then she's either trying to show you she doesn't enjoy talking to you, or there's something else going on. If you really care about her and want to get to the bottom of it, ask. "You seem really angry. Is there something going on?" If she says no, which she probably will, probe ONCE more- "I really do want to know- you seem to be upset with me no matter what I say- what's going on?"

[Asker]

ya but has done this way more than once. We fight and then don't talk to each other for awhile then she just comes back out of no where. Like if she blocks me on fb she will unblock me and don't give me a reason. She said sorry one time but she never changed so I asked if she mean't it and it was prob a lie. Do you think she just picks a fight cause that's her way of showing it or she knows she is in the wrong and just continues to still argue?

[valentine8]

What kind of stuff is she arguing with you about? What do you mean by "I do something good and be the better person and she gets mad"? What are you doing that is "good" that she gets upset about?

[Asker]

Honestly She just finds some reason to start a fight. Its mainly when I fight back she will find all the reason to make me fell gulity. I called her a b**** once or twice and she said that she is tired of being called that all the time when she even admitted to me that she was acting like one. If I try to say sorry or write her a poem just do something nice for her she just gets mad at me.

[valentine8]

She's walking all over you. Next time the conversation starts heading towards b**chy, tell her you're not interested in that kind of chat, and just stop talking. It's like a kid having a tantrum. You don't teach it anything by coddling it or sweet talking it when it starts whining, you stand your ground until they realize they can't walk all over you. When she stops "yelling" at you, or starts to sound apologetic, just tell her "you're no fun to talk to when we argue"

[Anonymous]

Yes, I would be willing if I feel like I'm being trampled on.