I am the same way, I'l be 27 by the end of December and never been on a date. I believe that it is de to my social anxiety, my inability to relate to the people around me because of uncommon interests, because I am quiet anyways, and because I have no idea what to do with my life. I am also angry, but more confused as to how to form a relationship. people don't see me as relationship material, probably because of the things I listed above. and to be honest I could sit at a table with a million people and not say a word, even with friends. I feel like I need other people to make the first move.
I also feel that if I had a girlfriend or at least had a few dates, everything would be easier to do later, to try again, and again. But I don't think I have anything to offer from myself. I am very introverted I feel, and I don't open up easily, and I am not myself around people. I am more worried about how they will take me and what I say, or I am afraid that I will say something bad or say something I think is funny.
and I don't know how your parents are, but for me I have never seen my parents do anything that would suggest that they are close, like kiss, or say I love you or anything like that. I think that my parents are complete opposites and I don't know how they even got together. But I do think that a lot of my unfamiliarity of love and all that stuff comes from never seeing it. Like there needs to be a barrier between me and everything else. I don't know, just things I think about.
Honestly I think the only emotions I really feel come from music and comedy
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My sentiments exactly. You said what I've always thought about myself, but never expressed it in words. I hate being a late-bloomer. People like us are always behind the curve and it embitters us because we want something that has always been out of reach. We end up taking our anger out on the very thing that we want because we believe we've been slighted by it all our lifes. It's tragically ironic really, because if the day ever comes where we come close to getting a girlfriend, we'll just push her away out of resentment of our past, rendering us further alone.
People like us are broken. I broke somewhere in my late teens/very early 20s and am slowly trying to fix myself. The first step is acceptance. You have to accept that this happened to you and refuse that it will keep happening, because you won't let it. Take it from someone in your position, you have to be persistent. My problem was I gave up too easily. You see it on GAG sometimes, where girls will say 'my boyfriend asked me out 3 times before I finally said yes'. Had that been me, I would've given up after the first time. Persistence man. You see a girl, you go after her and don't give up. Go after multiple girls at once. If you get rejected (which you will), it's not a reflection of yourself. It could be a multitude of factors. Rejection is a fact of life. It happens in many aspects of life. But that doesn't make you less of a person. Eventually if you throw enough mud at the wall, some of it is bound to stick.
Best of luck man. We're all in this f***ed up world together.
I know it can be frustrating. But to be honest, complaining about it or being angry long-term because of it won't help much. Yes, venting is good, but not to the point where it makes you unmotivated to do anything about your problem. Believe it or not, there are lots of good girls out there in their 20's that are just as unexperienced as you. Try finding one! Or maybe she'll find you. Either way, closing yourself off 100% won't help much. Always keep at least one door open, because you never know.
Sorry if this wasn't what you wanted to hear. Oh well.
I get it. Never as much held hands with a crush of mine. But I'd rather be single then be with someone I don't like. Being alone and feeling alone are two very different things to me. My siblings are older and late bloomers too. They're amazing people so I try to remind myself that not 'being normal' in the whole dating thing has nothing to do with me, it has to do with my standards for other people.
You deserve a girlfriend but not until you change your attitude. You'll take out the pent up hatred on her, I'm afraid.
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I was 24 when I had my first relationship. I guess I was bitter before. Really a man's sexual prime is at 18, and I was not getting laid then. I am now 29, almost 30, and I have had three relationships. I am alone right now, and it really does suck to start a new one, which could start into my 30's, but I don't think it's healthy to think that I'll be past my prime. I'm finding the older I get the more attractive I am two women. But yes, I do have a fear of being alone too. It's really depressing. Just know that you're not alone in these sh*tty feelings.
I'm 28 and I haven't had a boyfriend or anything either. I'm just really scared to be honest. I try to avoid the subject whenever it comes up. Anyway, I relate and you definitely aren't alone. There may not be a lot of women (or other guys) in the same boat, but we are out there.
Go out by yourself. It sucks, but I have done it before. To be honest, I've made out with a few ladies, and went home with one when I had gone out alone. Never actually got a real relationship out of it though, but it's good to get out and try, even if you are rejected. If you get rejected, who cares? You're hanging around a bunch of drunk people.
I will be 29 in a few weeks and I haven't had a girlfriend yet or ever been on a date so you are not alone, my sex drive is still pretty high, however I don't look like I'm going to be 29 so it throws off a lot of people.. however people who do look my age tend to look older then me.
My friend is trying to hook me up with someone but that's hard to make adjustment to that for not being in a relationship to just jumping right into one.. I mean how do you adjust to drop everything to make time?I feel this way too sometimes but at the same time I try my hardest to fight the negativity in my mind and I'm glad that I'm still in my 20's
meh, I still hadn't or never had one ethier I am 23,lol. I was too shy in high school.
I feel your pain on this because I was like you, I didn't have my very first girlfriend until age 27!, something I'm still kinda bitter about
feel that way all the time pal
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